Love, or crush, or whatever you call it

[Shiro_Ryuu]

I have met this girl, I only got to know her for a few days, but when I met her, I just have this aura when I'm with her, its a different one from what I feel with other people, a good feeling, and I keep thinking of her a lot. I can't understand why I feel this way, I don't understand these emotions I'm having, I don't understand anything of what's going on with my emotions now. Either way, I'm enjoying my stay in Japan, but man, this girl is just something, something about her that I could never find in any of the girls I have met in my life, except maybe one, although that one never acknowledged my existence, this girl actually KNOWS that I exist. I once fell in love with this other girl, but it ended up with horrible results. I feel lucky enough to get her email, although I won't see her in person for at least a VERY long time, I don't know if I'll even get to see her again. I only have 3 weeks left in this country which I'm very reluctant to leave because I love it so much. I'm just a helpless victim of my emotions, although at the same time. Don't take this the wrong way, I'm not letting my feelings get in the way of me having fun in this country. I'm having a hell of a time here, but I just don't think that I'll ever be able to hook up with this girl, and I feel that I really like her alot.


<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Shiroryuu on 2007-06-04 02:18 ]</font>

[RFB]

Well, not much can be said I'm afraid. Just try to make good use of your time left in Japan, see if you can somehow change your schedule to have time to meet up with her, try to make it clear wether it's lover or something else. If it indeed is love, fight for it, and try to find a way to go back to Japan.

Then again, saying it is very easy. Making it happen is a different story =S Good luck.

[Mystil]

Try to spend as much time with her as possible. Not too much time(don't wont to get creepy to her), but enough. When you leave try to stay in touch vai email.

Crushs can lead to serious feelings(lust can lead to the wrong ones). Sounds like you are beginning to fall in love but I don't know. All I know is, it's depressing when you can't spend a lot of time with someone you're really into, so try your best http://www.pso-world.com/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_smile.gif.

[AlexCraig]

Dude, hook up with her. That is plain and simple. There was this one girl, freshman year, at my school. I had a serious crush on her the entire year. So I hear later on that she is going to a different school far from here. Finally, within the last several weeks of school, I work up the nerve to talk to her; tell her how I feel about her. A week later, I gave her my address/phone #/ the whole shebang. About two weeks into the summer, she sends me a letter with her e-mail address. We kept in touch for over a year.
This is where I warn you, do NOT push your feelings upon her too much. That is how I LOST contact with this girl. Asked her to a dance, but she did not have the same feelings for me as I did her. BUT you should at least let her know. Keep in touch with her.

[DurakkenX]

There was something a smart person said once about this which I can't quite remember but it goes something like this...

"I'd rather regret something than live my life regretting that I had done nothing"
in other words
"No risk, no reward"

[AlexCraig]

Those are words to live by



<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: AlexCraig on 2007-06-04 08:25 ]</font>

[Skuda]

Definately. The only thing you really have to lose is pride.

[amtalx]

Hey, whatever it is you're feeling, go for it. If it doesn't work, you'll know it wasn't meant to be. If it does...well then, it does and that's awesome. http://www.pso-world.com/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_smile.gif

[clynn]

I would love to help you but i suck with these things:
But i will tell you that you should give it a shot, you cant mess it up (i hope your not like me because then you can..easy..)

[Feelmirath]

I say "GO 4 EET"- you only live life once, so jump at yer chances.

[ABDUR101]

If you've only known her afew days, how can you love her? You love the 'thought' of her, but unless you know someone's worst and best sides; and still enjoy them for who they are as a whole, it's not love, it's an infatuation with the 'thought' of what you 'think' they are.

Get to know her, but don't mis-use the word 'love'. Love is alot more than a mere infatuation. Until you're dealing with the worst possible scenarios with someone, and seeing them through it until the end, and fighting to keep things together because you WANT things to work, regardless of the bad; it's not love.

I've seen alot of people get all mushy and gushy and say how they love each other; and you know what, it's easy to love someone when all they are is bullshit and covering up their own farts. And as soon as shit starts to stink; dear lord, no way, what were they thinking, it wasn't PERFECT so something must be wrong; love is PERFECT so it could'nt have been love, etc.

From your post, it seems like you're rushing and thinking far too much into it. You have no idea how this person feels, what they generally like, what they're looking for, hopes, dreams and what they aspire to do with themselves; and thats not even thinking of what they want in another person, IF they even want to bother with another person right now.

Slow down, talk to the person, get to know them. Three weeks isn't long enough to get to know someone for who they really are; it takes a long time to see all aspects of a person, good and bad; and only then can you know if it's right and worthwhile for you.(and vice versa for them)

[trypticon]

On 2007-06-04 13:23, ABDUR101 wrote:
If you've only known her afew days, how can you love her? You love the 'thought' of her, but unless you know someone's worst and best sides; and still enjoy them for who they are as a whole, it's not love, it's an infatuation with the 'thought' of what you 'think' they are.

Get to know her, but don't mis-use the word 'love'. Love is alot more than a mere infatuation. Until you're dealing with the worst possible scenarios with someone, and seeing them through it until the end, and fighting to keep things together because you WANT things to work, regardless of the bad; it's not love.

I've seen alot of people get all mushy and gushy and say how they love each other; and you know what, it's easy to love someone when all they are is bullshit and covering up their own farts. And as soon as shit starts to stink; dear lord, no way, what were they thinking, it wasn't PERFECT so something must be wrong; love is PERFECT so it could'nt have been love, etc.

From your post, it seems like you're rushing and thinking far too much into it. You have no idea how this person feels, what they generally like, what they're looking for, hopes, dreams and what they aspire to do with themselves; and thats not even thinking of what they want in another person, IF they even want to bother with another person right now.

Slow down, talk to the person, get to know them. Three weeks isn't long enough to get to know someone for who they really are; it takes a long time to see all aspects of a person, good and bad; and only then can you know if it's right and worthwhile for you.(and vice versa for them)



100% agreed.

If you insist on persuing this, and you're worried about her forgetting about you, you could always try to get her pregnant. At least then she will always remember you, and you might get a chance to see her again. Although, this might also be a huge dishonor to her family, and they may wind up disowning her due to her having intercourse before she's married. She may also be seen as a "used good" after that, and may not be able to become wed in that culture.

I'm going off some culture in China with that, while knowing that Japan is an honorable society, too.

If you're only going to be there for that long, you may as well forget about her. A chance for you two getting together and staying together in a positive situation is a long shot, at best.

[AlexCraig]

But a long shot is better than no shot at all. As for getting her pregnant, that is completely uncouth and cruel if he's not gonna be there for her. While I do agree that you should get to know her, you should tell her your feelings. That way, you can get to know her and build a better relationship, while at the same time getting that pressure off your shoulders.

Besides, if you don't take advantage of your time there and tell her your feelings, you will regret it for the rest of your life, past marriage, children, and old age. And the pressure on your shoulders will turn to hate for yourself about not telling her your feelings.

Go for it!

[DurakkenX]

While I agree with what ABDUR said as far as some points I have to say that it is best to be forthright and do what you feel, but do not get your hopes up thinking that there will be some long term relationship, but also remember not to just say avoid since it may not happen.

in other words, "hope for the best, expect the worst"

Also... Love as an emotion is easy to create... it is produced by the same chemicals in heroine and effects the brain in much the same way according to science...I'm not saying this is all love is, but realize that this could easily just be a biological reaction.

[Shiro_Ryuu]

Thanks guys, and no, I am so NOT going to make her pregnant, that is uncool.

[VanHalen]

I say go for it. Don't make the same mistake I made this year by not telling the girl I liked I liked her when I had the chance



<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: VanHalen on 2007-06-04 16:12 ]</font>

[navci]

On 2007-06-04 13:23, ABDUR101 wrote:
If you've only known her afew days, how can you love her? You love the 'thought' of her, but unless you know someone's worst and best sides; and still enjoy them for who they are as a whole, it's not love, it's an infatuation with the 'thought' of what you 'think' they are.
....

Slow down, talk to the person, get to know them. Three weeks isn't long enough to get to know someone for who they really are; it takes a long time to see all aspects of a person, good and bad; and only then can you know if it's right and worthwhile for you.(and vice versa for them)



:> That is why I love this dude, he knows shit about people. I don't believe in love at first sight, or even second, or even third. It takes a bloody long time to really love a person, especially all aspect of them. So you don't end up slashing them into pieces.

But on the other hand


On 2007-06-04 08:27, Skuda wrote:
Definately. The only thing you really have to lose is pride.



I have to agree with that as well.
So. Ya, try not to creep her out. XD

[DurakkenX]

Remember that the old saying of eyes half closed when dating and fully open when married is wrong... it should be the other way around ^.^ If you trust the person then you have no reason to keep your eyes on them >.>

[DikkyRay]

i say.....get to know her.
Theres a difference between love and infatuation. You can only tell when you really get to know her.
But dont make the same mistake as me. I really really liked a girl. I got to the point that i knew it wasnt infatuation.
But....she really changed in the course of a few months. Started smoking and drinking. And all the respect and love for her all went down the drain.
but eh.....you are older than me so do what you want...... listen to others with more experiance

[Sekani]

Ask her out on a date.

It's a good way to find out if she has enough of an interest in you to try and form a relationship without muddling things up in case the feeling isn't mutual.

[AlexCraig]

Yeah. I think Sekani has the right idea.

[Jehosaphaty]

If you insist on persuing this, and you're worried about her forgetting about you, you could always try to get her pregnant. At least then she will always remember you, and you might get a chance to see her again.

This could be the funniest quote I've seen in weeks. Wonderful really.

[HAYABUSA-FMW-]

On 2007-06-04 20:15, Jehosaphaty wrote:

If you insist on persuing this, and you're worried about her forgetting about you, you could always try to get her pregnant. At least then she will always remember you, and you might get a chance to see her again.

This could be the funniest quote I've seen in weeks. Wonderful really.


That reminds me of the King Of the Hill episode with the Japanese version of Hank Hill.

[Shiro_Ryuu]

Well, kinda had a double date with her, her best friend [a girl], and some other gaijin [a dude] that I got to know in the trip who's from another state than me. While I was talking more to the girl I'm talking about, that other guy was talking to that girl's best friend. Well, she turned out to be a pretty cool girl, I kind of liked her alot. We talked about lots of things, like taste in music, where we were born, what we want to do w/ our lives [we both wanna be teachers =D], etc. She seems to be a very nice girl so far. I'm gonna try and hang out w/ her more often.

[Mystil]

Heh adbur has definitly seen his fair share of ups and downs in life.

[VanHalen]

I'm glad to here things are going well http://www.pso-world.com/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_smile.gif

[ABDUR101]

Lets not forget, that you're only in the country for another week or so. I don't mean to 'burst your bubble' but I will gladly hit you with a dose of reality. Just because you went out on a double-date, TALKED about yourselves to one another and were nice to each other; it doesn't mean anything. If you were able to stay in country, and had the basis for a relationship that isn't long distance; I'd say keep showing an interest, keep getting involved, and see where things go.

But lets face the reality here. You're leaving the countru in afew weeks. You're 20, yes? How old is she? Older, younger? Both of you want to be teachers right now; and thats all well and good but that takes a college education to be able to step into. Even if you kept in touch over the phone, the internet, whatever; what are the odds of a long distance relationship lasting until both of you are in a position to continue and move forward with it?

Everyone thinks it's so easy being in a long distance relationship if there's 'love and commitment'; but guess what, it's not. Not being able to touch the person you care about, not being able to go do things with them, not being able to comfort them physically and just be there when they need it; even the thought of the distance between you is enough to frustrate and cause bad tension.

I'm not saying it hasn't been done; it has, but lets not kid ourselves when I say it was no small feat of endurance mentally to follow through. Aswell; even if you do keep in touch and intend to get together, if everything goes well long distance wise and you keep in touch and finally get together; how do you know neither of you will have changed from what you were, that initial spark. And then lets not forget, that until you live with someone for a solid year or more, constantly; you don't really know the person. You don't know their habits and little itty bitty things about them that they do, that you might really dislike and hate, but thats them as a person and can't be changed.

Long distance relationships are hard, because we get lost in our minds with what we want to see of the other person, instead of whats really there. Aswell, its all too easy to put of a facade and show nothing but a false sense of who you are on the internet and telephone; people do it everyday, all day, it's second nature.

Tread carefully and slowly, take everything with a grain of salt and have no expectations; it's not just your life you can mess with when you involve someone else; alot of people forget that.

[Shiro_Ryuu]

Yeah, thanks Abdur, I understand what you are talking about. I just feel that I can't control my emotions though. Before this trip, I tried to just completely give up on love [yeah, sounds a bit immature, I know] and if anything, just go for a good fuck. I don't know, the feelings just popped out on their own. Oh well, I'm aware of the pain I'm going to go through when I go back to America and at the very least, not going to see her for a very long time. I'm 21 and she's like 18 if you wanna know. I'll follow your advice though, I'm taking it slow. Some are telling me to be more aggressive, but DJ from this site told me to take it slow as well.

[DurakkenX]

On 2007-06-05 23:18, ABDUR101 wrote:
Everyone thinks it's so easy being in a long distance relationship if there's 'love and commitment'; but guess what, it's not. Not being able to touch the person you care about, not being able to go do things with them, not being able to comfort them physically and just be there when they need it; even the thought of the distance between you is enough to frustrate and cause bad tension



This is very true. Ive been there, being that I've only been able to get into long distance relationships due to my choices in life. Quite frankly, even if the relationship goes good and whatever your emotions something always happens within a or two's time...

Before you proceed think about this very carefully...
#1 if you really do have emotions for this person is it not wrong to do something that it will hurt them, such as starting a relationship that you will have to stop soon or won't be able to follow through with?
#2 Do you believe that no matter what you can trust this person? There may be a time when you run into someone that tells you something that may not be true, but knows more than you do of them.
#3 Do you have enough in common to talk for 4-8 years and not get on that person's nerves?

I've had 2 great relationships fall apart on me first one because of trust, second because suddenly something changed the ability to speak to each other just changed for some reason and then it broke into an argument about who's fault it was.

This being said...Don't miss an opportunity for love. You never know what will happen and you never know what importance it will play in your life. Go with your feelings. The only thing that could happen is it doesn't work out you learn something.

[opaopajr]

dude Abdur, total debbie downer.... http://www.pso-world.com/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_frown.gif

seriously people, love at first sight does exist -- but it's not all that common. 2nd, just because it's love doesn't mean it's always the same type of love we envision as "long-term, stable" love. sadly our english language only leaves us with 1 word so we are kinda stuck with it. being able to tolerate someone's farts in bed and stare in the same direction for decades on end holding their hand is just one type of love and not necessarily everyone's goal, nor should it be.

so here's my "logic," if such an insipid and useless thing as logic can be applied to such affairs of the heart:

f*** slow. (yeah, double entendre 'n all)
go for it.
enjoy it.
do everything you'd like, she'd like, and quite a bit of stuff you both are still timid about, too.
visit condomania -- bitchin' store.

you got 3 weeks and then the rest of your life. burn like a bottle rocket, land, and if the stars bring you on back together in the future, light up the nights again. some of us fogies' most intense memories of love were filled with sparks like fireworks, and often burned out just as fast. just 'cuz some people's long term love steams quietly like shit on a cold day doesn't mean it's the ideal for what's budding between all y'all.

remember: no risky, no frisky and, if it's real love it can handle a bumpy ride or two. you better have that headboard bangin' in days or you'll regret it!



<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: opaopajr on 2007-06-06 04:00 ]</font>

[Mystil]

On 2007-06-05 23:44, Shiroryuu wrote:
Yeah, thanks Abdur, I understand what you are talking about. I just feel that I can't control my emotions though. Before this trip, I tried to just completely give up on love [yeah, sounds a bit immature, I know]



That's not immature at all. Any reason to give up on love has a universal understanding. Even just being alone for awhile is ok. Because it is the one thing that will hurt more than a wound and linger more than a bad oder. When you get into, you feel like you are in paradise. When you are crushed, it's a feeling you wouldn't wont to experience ever again in life.

[Skuda]

On 2007-06-05 23:18, ABDUR101 wrote:
Not being able to touch the person you care about, not being able to go do things with them, not being able to comfort them physically and just be there when they need it;



owww... Totally hit close to home there, abdur. ;<

But yeah.. long distance relationships are tough. If you really want it to work, you can't do anything but tough it out, and hope for the best.



<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Skuda on 2007-06-06 05:40 ]</font>

[omegapirate2k]

Well, if you can get an arrangement like that to work, then all the best to you.

[Shiro_Ryuu]

Oh yeah, about touching her, remember that she's Japanese, and even now in person, I refrain from touching her since thats how Japanese people think for the most part, that men touching women isn't right. But not hearing her voice is one thing that'll be tough. I'm just gonna try my best and see how it goes. I know that if I do nothing, I'll regret it for the rest of my life.

[AlexCraig]

Atta boy! ^_^

[Banish]

The more a person falls in love, the better person they become http://www.pso-world.com/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_smile.gif

[Sinue_v2]

being able to tolerate someone's farts in bed and stare in the same direction for decades on end holding their hand is just one type of love

ROFL. I remember reading a quote in like Heavy Metal magazine YEARS ago where I think it one of the guys from Warrant said "True Love is being able to fart in bed and holding her head under the covers, and she still forgives you."

Also: If you did get her pregenant, you could always go for that Miss Saigon angle. Then again, that didn't work out so well for Kim - so it might not be a bright idea.

Also Also: Remember...
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v203/Sinue/1178638162839.jpg

And finally, listen to Abdur. I'm suprised that's not common sence for everyone here, but he's dead on right on this point.

[Banish]

http://i14.photobucket.com/albums/a314/fatterpiller058/funny%20stuff/safesex.jpg




<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Fujita on 2007-06-07 12:02 ]</font>

[chaos89]

"Abdur the Wise" never doubt him

[Shiro_Ryuu]

Man, I think I should just give up. Some part of me is telling me that I should just give up and forget about her. I just don't know what to do anymore.

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Shiroryuu on 2007-06-07 23:57 ]</font>

[trypticon]

On 2007-06-07 23:44, Shiroryuu wrote:
Man, I think I should just give up. Some part of me is telling me that I should just give up and forget about her. I just don't know what to do anymore.

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Shiroryuu on 2007-06-07 23:57 ]</font>


That's probably not a bad idea. It's going to be the choice that gives you less pain in the long run.

[AlexCraig]

What are you, a quitter? Don't give up! Of course things are going to be tough, but what would things be like if everything in life was easy? Someone said earlier that it will be very rewarding in the end if it all works well. Granted there is a high chance it won't work out well, but that is life. A gamble.

[Sinue_v2]

We choose to go to the moon and have long distance relationships with Japanese chicks in this decade - and do the other things. Not because they are easy, but because they are hard.

http://newsimg.bbc.co.uk/media/images/40967000/jpg/_40967024_kennedy_ap.jpg

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Sinue_v2 on 2007-06-08 10:43 ]</font>

[ABDUR101]

I think you're too much thinking about yourself, and not thinking about her. You're talking like you're the only one with emotions and a say in the whole thing.

Have you even talked to her about any of this? If you haven't, wow, you might as well give up because long distance relationships don't need one person to be self-centered. You say you don't know what to do, well, if you don't talk to her about it, how the hell can you even begin to START thinking about it period?

[Shiro_Ryuu]

Yeah, one reason why I was thinking of giving up is because once I leave and we get too close, it may be painful for her if she likes me. Also, I don't know if she'll even like me, and if she doesn't, it'll be hard work for nothing. I have spoken to her, but I don't wanna go to fast w/ that, but at the same time, I'm out of here in 2 weeks, and I know that if I do nothing, I'm going to regret it. Part of me still wants to keep trying.

[Shiro_Ryuu]

Right now, I'm still more in the mentality that if I do nothing about this, I'm going to regret it for the rest of my life. I think I'll stay the course and see how it goes.

[AlexCraig]

*thumbs up*

[DonRoyale]

There's plenty of fish in the sea d00d. Patience, you'll find what will work.

Distance relationships won't, she could cheat on you and you'd have no clue ;o

Teacher...I fucking hate kids =

[Jaysky]

On 2007-06-10 18:07, DonRoyale wrote:
There's plenty of fish in the sea d00d. Patience, you'll find what will work.

Distance relationships won't, she could cheat on you and you'd have no clue ;o

Teacher...I fucking hate kids =


Don, you know nothing about love so don't give out advice like this. Plenty of fish in the sea? Shiro was going to give up on love, and then he meets someone which changes that in him, and then you say there's plenty of fish in the sea?! We're stepping outside...

[trypticon]

On 2007-06-10 18:31, Jaysky wrote:

On 2007-06-10 18:07, DonRoyale wrote:
There's plenty of fish in the sea d00d. Patience, you'll find what will work.

Distance relationships won't, she could cheat on you and you'd have no clue ;o

Teacher...I fucking hate kids =


Don, you know nothing about love so don't give out advice like this. Plenty of fish in the sea? Shiro was going to give up on love, and then he meets someone which changes that in him, and then you say there's plenty of fish in the sea?! We're stepping outside...



Yes, but on the same note, this person he has met, though not feasibly possible for a long term relationship, has successfully caused him to open up to romance again. There are others out there, and finding somebody he has more in common with (home country, for starters) will allow him more feasibly accessibly romantic possibilities.

[Sord]

honestly, unlike a lot of other people that say go go go for love and all that, I say forget it. You don't have anywhere near the time needed to get to know each other, and you'll be way to far apart. Even learning about each other over time over the internet is definitly not the same as being with them physically. All the odd quirks and annoyances of a physical contact are gone, and that leaves you to fantasize your little mind away about just what emotions are behind certain words.

I don't care what others might say, I sincerly doubt you will regret abandoning this for years and years to come. The average life time is somewhere between 60-90 depending on where you live. In that time you will most likely meet a person who you can love, while you are more stable in life, and in such a position that you can actually meet regularly. You may never forget her, but you human, and as such your feelings will dull in time.

Even after the greatest of losses, the death of a loved one, many people can look back after a few years and not cry about that persons death. It no longer saddens them or grieves them enough to cause tears at a minor thought. You will put it behind you, and you will move on (unless you do something as royaly stupid as suicide,) and maybe even forget about it in years to come. Human feelings never remain the same, they always fluctuate and are subject experiance and time.

Despite what you feel, you will not regret throwing in the towel in this one instance for the rest of your life.

[Solstis]

It is silly to think that you will only have one love. First love, yes.

A love isn't significant without the time investment, or maybe my experience just makes me more practical about it. I know that there are posters that have been married for a while (or divorced for a while), and they can probably say more on the matter than I can.

Taking the advice of weepy-eyed teens is probably just as bad as listening to the severe cynics. Pursue what's there, it'll probably be worth it, but don't expect much from long distance. I've considered longdistance relationships before, but holding out was worth it. You don't want to meet someone in person and have to go through the dilemma of having to dump the person you're tied to via phone/'net.

[Shiro_Ryuu]

Guess what guys? There's another program that I'm seriously considering that would let me study here in Ritsumeikan University [in Kyoto] for a YEAR. Well, this girl is not the primary reason why I'm thinking of doing this, but yeah, I may be doing this program for a year [and don't worry guys, I'll try to be on PSU and I'll try to write up on my fanfic for this year in Japan]. Now that we got that out of the way, there may be plenty of fish in the water, but you still gotta find that really big, heavy one, and I feel that I found it.
Seriously, I was gonna give up on love before I just flat out ended up like this guy: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ER-0Anqbfns

[opaopajr]

first, outside of hilarious gratuitous violence, there is nothing worthwhile in Fist of the North Star. not in the anime, in the manga, in the video games, or the merchandising. nothing. would possibly be the last place on earth to listen to any sort of advice. heed my wisdom. http://www.pso-world.com/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_razz.gif

second, married couples in japan don't touch in public, what makes you think you can get away with it? that's what love hotels, private booths, and karaoke rooms are for. seriously, if you think this has any chance of going anywhere someone's gotta make a move sometime. and i think it would be a bad bet waiting for her to make the first move... just a hunch.

third, good on you. hope you get to stay another year. but just in case it don't work get what you are feeling out now. yes, long distance relationships suck -- i don't recommend them at all -- but who said anything about eternal devotion from 6000+ miles away. never understood the 'i touched your hoo-hoo, i guess this means we're wedded at the hip now' level of early dating monogamy. the kids need to rediscover dating! third base (or home) does not equal marriage engagement! /shakes fist of impotent rage

[Shiro_Ryuu]

Actually, I'm in Japan and like boyfriends and girlfriends kind of touch eachother quite a bit, like some cuddling, guy w/ arms on girl's shoulders, I see quite a bit of that in public, but she doesn't seem like one of those girls. And Fist of the North Star is awesome. >=(
And I was actually acting like that before I even heard of that show, like during my emo high school years.

[SStrikerR]

u betr hope she has aim lol.

[Shiro_Ryuu]

Well, if she has it, we'll be in different time zones. ._.

[SStrikerR]

oh.... -_-. didnt think bout that. stinks for u.






notice-this isnt a rant anymore, this should be moved to like, off-topic. altough it is an interesting topic.....

[Shiro_Ryuu]

Well, I today I talked to her for hours again, about stuff like our family, our religious beliefs, and we went out for sushi after the school field trip, and we sat together and such. Now, next time I meet her, I think I'm going to spill the beans and tell her that I like her. I have nothing to lose and everything to gain, so yeah, I'll do it. I asked everyone from my roomates, some of my friends I know from my class, and even a Japanese dude whom I've befriended, and they all told me to do it, so I will, and I'll tell you what happens. I'm ready to take this dive.

[AlexCraig]

*Thumbs up* Alright, Shiroryuu!

[astuarlen]

On 2007-06-05 23:44, Shiroryuu wrote:
I'm 21 and she's like 18 if you wanna know.

I find your lack of precision disturbing. I hope this is, like, just an "improper" insertion of like.

Also, if I were a girl--oh, wait a minute!--I might feel a little uncomfortable if someone I'd known for such a brief time (well, most any amount of time, really) had taken to posting my picture, professing his love, and discussing his perceived relationship with me online. But, yeah, maybe that's just me.

[Weeaboolits]

Yeah, astuarlen's right, that's probly a good way to scare girl off. :/

[Wheatpenny]

On 2007-06-04 17:57, DikkyRay wrote:
i say.....get to know her.
Theres a difference between love and infatuation. You can only tell when you really get to know her.
But dont make the same mistake as me. I really really liked a girl. I got to the point that i knew it wasnt infatuation.
But....she really changed in the course of a few months. Started smoking and drinking. And all the respect and love for her all went down the drain.
but eh.....you are older than me so do what you want...... listen to others with more experiance


LOL why didn't you ask me I do have a specific thread to ask questions.

Damn Dikky Ray took the words out of my mouth.
You need to make sure it is the real deal like he said though.



<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Wheatpenny on 2007-06-13 14:52 ]</font>

[Shiro_Ryuu]

I've kind of gotten to know her in the limited time I've had to meet her. And that 21-18 difference isn't so great when we get older, like 3 years from now for example, it'll be me 24, and her 21, and like a few more years later, that difference is gonna seem even smaller.

[AlexCraig]

Did you tell her how you feel yet?

[roygbiv]

On 2007-06-13 10:47, astuarlen wrote:
Also, if I were a girl--oh, wait a minute!--I might feel a little uncomfortable if someone I'd known for such a brief time (well, most any amount of time, really) had taken to posting my picture, professing his love, and discussing his perceived relationship with me online. But, yeah, maybe that's just me.





Yeah I have to agree, this whole thing is wicked sketchy.

[Shiro_Ryuu]

Well, um, she gave me some chocolates or something, does that mean anything? This was also before I got the chance to tell her how I felt, at which she reacted by telling me that she was very happy to hear it, and that she'll never forget me.

[Solstis]

On 2007-06-18 07:35, Shiroryuu wrote:
Well, um, she gave me some chocolates or something, does that mean anything? This was also before I got the chance to tell her how I felt, at which she reacted by telling me that she was very happy to hear it, and that she'll never forget me.



I'm not Japanese, she might just be being polite, or is totally in to you.

Only you can tell.

[trypticon]

On 2007-06-18 07:35, Shiroryuu wrote:
Well, um, she gave me some chocolates or something, does that mean anything? This was also before I got the chance to tell her how I felt, at which she reacted by telling me that she was very happy to hear it, and that she'll never forget me.



I've quoted what was important in your statement. If those were her exact words, it seems like she understands the situation of the long distance relationship, and isn't up for it. Rather than be an ass and turn you down, she's saying she won't forget you. Either that, or she's not interested in you the way you are interested in her.

I'm not sure where you come from, but it sounds more like a "good bye" than a, "hello, let's get into a long distance relationship without proof that we'll ever see eachother again."

[ABDUR101]

I agree, that was her way of letting you down easy, still wanting to maybe stay in touch, etc but not wanting to be commited to a long distance relationship. And remember; just because you're head over heels for her doesn't mean she's into you the same way or even on the same level.

As for age difference, pffft. As long as she's not a minor, it's fine. I went out with a dood who was 36; I'm 23. We're still good friends.

[Shiro_Ryuu]

Thanks for the comments and honesty guys. I'll keep those in mind. I'm sad to say that this is my last week here in Japan, and I only have a couple days left here in Kyoto, which is near the city where the girl lives (Osaka). I did do my best, I can say that much though. I'm going to see how things go in the future, and hopefully, things go for the best, though I won't expect it.

[BryantGrundle]

Stick it in da butt

[Sinue_v2]

On 2007-06-07 09:16, Sinue_v2 wrote:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v203/Sinue/1178638162839.jpg

[Shiro_Ryuu]

I love her so much, and I'm going to miss her when I'm away, and she told me that she'll miss me too. She really blushed when I told her how I felt, and although Japanese people do refrain from touching, she allowed me to put my hand on her shoulder when we took a picture together, and we hugged before she had to go home. I was too afraid to get a kiss though, I didn't have the heart to do it. But I love her, we seem to be similar in so many ways, and when I'm with her, I have a feeling of nervousness, but at the same time, a feeling of comfort and that I can tell her anything. I'll hopefully be coming back to the country to study for a year, and if I'm up for it, I might want to live in this country for the rest of my life. Some of you may scrutinize me for this, but I feel more at home here than I ever did in America, this is coming from someone who's been there, not only as a tourist, but as a student as well. I gave her some presents, like a tshirt of my college, and a couple fo CDs from 2 of her favorite bands, and she was so excited and turned red when I gave them to her. So yeah, I'm hoping for the best.

[Shiro_Ryuu]

Well, if you're curious on how things went, *sticks a v-sign/peace sign*
Being like most Japanese people, this girl doesn't seem to let other guys touch her in any way, but she did let me hug her and put my hand on her shoulder, she gave me some chocolates, said that she will keep in touch with me, was happy to hear that I liked her, and blushed when I told her. She doesn't seem to try to avoid me either. I'm back in America, but I'll try my best to keep in touch with her, and she said she'll do the same as well.

[AlexCraig]

See? You still have a chance! It may be a while, but if you play your cards right, it will all work out for you in the end! *V-sign*