Females and common courtesy...

[hollowtip]

Before I proceed into my rant, I'm apologizing to the women ahead of time that do not fit this particular mold that I'm about to detail, but considering the disrespect I've encountered from what I now consider the normal female, I have to get this off my chest.

common courtesy and respect seem to be prevalently absent qualities in females.

Let me summarize a few of my personal experiences:

experience #1: I planned on meeting this girl that I had been talking to for a couple weeks. The night comes and goes without receiving a phone call or a text message. The next morning she explains that an emergency was the reason she was unable to get in touch with me, so we reschedule. The next meeting falls through as well but this time I don't get contacted at all. It's been about 3 weeks and I just learned of her engagement to another man but not through her.

experience #2: I met a girl a couple of months ago and started dating. We made our relationship official after a few weeks of knowing each other. about one week into the relationship we get into an argument about decisions she's made in the past, and me giving her advice for the future. She perceived it as me "lecturing" her. The next phone call we basically just continued where we left off and our contact came to an abrupt end forever with a, "oh hey I have a really important phone call on the other line, let me call you back."

Experience #3: Same exact situation as experience #1 but with a different girl, and happened on the first planned meeting with no reason as to why she bailed.

Now these are only a few experiences. I could list at least a few more, but it would be overkill, and I can drive my point home with what I listed above.

Is it too inconvenient for a woman to respectfully explain why it is they lost interest in a man? This isn't a rhetorical question. I honestly don't understand why females cannot give common courtesy to reject a man with integrity.

What bothers me more though is that within the female social construct, this is an accepted way of rectifying the newly found lack of interest for the male.

Doesn't anyone else think this is disrespectful? I can understand if the man is obsessive, and doesn't paint the picture even when it's spelled out in the most comprehensible terms, but I'm nowhere near obsessive.

I perceive it as a slap in the face, where the female is basically saying, "you're not worth my time." I would rather the female tell me I'm hideously ugly or a poor pathetic waste of a man as an excuse or reason as to why they don't want to continue dating me rather then leaving me to wonder what the hell happened.

At least I could learn from the mistakes I made with that particular girl and not make them again with another in the future.

[enoch]

ha, girls are aliens, didnt I say this before?
but seriously. Ive only met one decent girl in my life and shes like my best friend ( not gf lol)
I think its rare (sorry girls lol your so indecent) Im about to get shot....

[SabZero]

Well, that's lack of respect, and it's not gender specific.

Eh, sorry about that. I guess it proves you're better off that way http://www.pso-world.com/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_razz.gif

[enoch]

i didnt say all girls were bad....just the ones you end up trying to date.....>.>

[Freeze]

Must be payback for all the years we've been doing it to them. Seriously though general respect for each other seems to be slowly disappearing with each generation. There are always exceptions but both genders do it.

[Kylie]

Get with the Southern ladies. http://www.pso-world.com/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_wink.gif

Naaaaaaaaaaaah. I think anyone can be decent anywhere if they care enough to be. A lot of men I've met are pigs, and I honestly can't stand many girls (actually, I think I have something like twenty male friends in real life to one female right now http://www.pso-world.com/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_lol.gif). But there are some decent ones out there and probably just as many decent males.

[enoch]

southern? im in texas o.o. these girls are scary...they are alot stronger than meeee

[hollowtip]

On 2008-04-08 10:53, Kylie wrote:
Get with the Southern ladies. http://www.pso-world.com/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_wink.gif

Naaaaaaaaaaaah. I think anyone can be decent anywhere if they care enough to be. A lot of men I've met are pigs, and I honestly can't stand many girls (actually, I think I have something like twenty male friends in real life to one female right now http://www.pso-world.com/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_lol.gif). But there are some decent ones out there and probably just as many decent males.



Well I think that's the root of the problem. If a female loses interest (care) in the male, the respect goes with it. I'm totally agreeing with you as far as a lot of men being pigs, but from my personal experiences with my male contacts and friends, they at least bring closure to a situation by voicing why they became disinterested in the female, even if it was because of selfish intentions. In contrast, women deem social abandonment as an acceptable conclusion to their disinterest for a male without expressing reason.

I am at least honest and direct with women when I've lost interest in them after awhile of dating (and I've dated a decent amount of women), because I feel obligated to give them at least that considering the time that went into getting to know each other.

[enoch]

come to think of it..I see that happens alot. except for this one chick I know. shes Bi and shes really awesome. like ALOT different than other girls. does her being bi have something to do with it?

[Kylie]

On 2008-04-08 11:43, hollowtip wrote:
Well I think that's the root of the problem. If a female loses interest (care) in the male, the respect goes with it. I'm totally agreeing with you as far as a lot of men being pigs, but from my personal experiences with my male contacts and friends, they at least bring closure to a situation by voicing why they became disinterested in the female, even if it was because of selfish intentions. In contrast, women deem social abandonment as an acceptable conclusion to their disinterest for a male without expressing reason.

I am at least honest and direct with women when I've lost interest in them after awhile of dating (and I've dated a decent amount of women), because I feel obligated to give them at least that considering the time that went into getting to know each other.

Not all women are like that (me for example). If I don't want to be around someone, I'll tell them that and why. I could never be fake or mean enough to just start hating on someone and not tell them why. However, there are situations, because I'm very anti-conflict, where I've tolerated someone because I didn't think it was worth bringing up the issue, or I've avoided someone that I wouldn't have to talk to much anyways. At times I've done that to the point I go crazy, but it comes out eventually if it needs to (if I feel it'd be beneficial to me and the other person to do so).

Every woman and case is never the same, and I think it'd be equally unfair of me to say that all men are pigs, when not all of them are. http://www.pso-world.com/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_razz.gif Not all women are rude or dishonest either. And I say this with having problems with many women, myself, so I know where you're coming from.




<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Kylie on 2008-04-08 12:22 ]</font>

[Zorafim]

Hm, I suppose I'll add this. Women say that chivalry is dead, but it's rather difficult to be a gentleman when there isn't a lady to be one around.

[Vanzazikon]

On 2008-04-08 13:49, Zorafim wrote:
Hm, I suppose I'll add this. Women say that chivalry is dead, but it's rather difficult to be a gentleman when there isn't a lady to be one around.

LOL! Now that´s Classic.

[rogue_robot]

On 2008-04-08 13:49, Zorafim wrote:
Hm, I suppose I'll add this. Women say that chivalry is dead, but it's rather difficult to be a gentleman when there isn't a lady to be one around.



QFT - even worse when they blatantly ignore chivalry rendered in spite of said certain individual woman being a complete bitch.

[HUnewearl_Meira]

Hollowtip, I've got a better question for you: Why are you attracted to women who will lose interest in you? Consider that, and once you've figured it out, the solution to your problem will become more apparent.

What I'm seeing out of this, is that the women that you're asking out, tend to be somewhat fickle, but more likely, they are moderately submissive and heavily anti-confrontational; they'd rather wish you away than face you. Probably, their fathers tended to be angry-ish men, who were prone to exercising verbal abuse in one form or another. I'd guess that your father and your mother's father probably have similar qualities.

I'm guessing that your mother used to work full time, and you didn't see a whole lot of her; when you did see her, I'd furthermore suppose that she didn't seem to connect to you. She might have been somewhat flighty, and unreliable in following through with the promises she made. This is what I'm guessing-- if I'm horribly wrong, please correct me. If I'm right, however, then this is likely why you keep finding yourself with these women. I promise you that it's not entirely by accident, that you keep getting ignored.

[Chuck_Norris]

I don't think it's just woman. It's most people now days :/

People have been getting lazy about things for years. With advancements in technology(?). And that seems to be tansfering over to the way they act twards other humans.

Or maybe you're just a total bitch magnet. http://www.pso-world.com/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_wacko.gif

[omegapirate2k]

Yep, inconsideration rolls both ways, my friend.

[Sekani]

In the text-message era, breakups are supposed to be as impersonal as possible. Times have changed.

Most women also believe that chivalry is boring, despite what we all see on TV, and is almost a guaranteed way to end up in the friend zone.

[SStrikerR]

Yeah, the last girl I "dated" lost interest (as did I) within a few days, so she sent someone else to do the honors of ending it. I already knew it was coming, and I even knew what was next, "She feels really bad about it, she hates herself now." Yeah, right. I just keep laughing when shit happens and go up and find someone else, because I'm never gonna find a good girlfriend till I try, right?

Sucks sometimes, and it's worse when it ends up in a bad way, but just roll with the punches.

That's all you can do though. http://www.pso-world.com/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_wacko.gif

[BlaizeYES]

On 2008-04-08 09:11, Freeze wrote:

There are always exceptions but both genders do it.




precisely. guys do the same thing, except that girls are usually much more persistent when they begin being "obsessive."

if you meet a girl, have fun for a week, decide to go out, then was suffocating you... wouldnt you want to break away? honestly. think about it rationally. then on top of this, trying to know everything about your past and then "lecture" you on it, even going as far as to continue the conversation she was lecturing you about that you hoped would be buried THE VERY NEXT DAY on the phone on the exact same subject, won't you start to see it as a pretty bland, conflicted "relationship" that really doesn't go anywhere? i think the problem is YOU, MY BOY!


no offense, it's just you have to think of it from both points of view before saying that girls are assholes because how you act as soon as they say you like them

[hollowtip]

On 2008-04-08 14:49, HUnewearl_Meira wrote:
Hollowtip, I've got a better question for you: Why are you attracted to women who will lose interest in you? Consider that, and once you've figured it out, the solution to your problem will become more apparent.

What I'm seeing out of this, is that the women that you're asking out, tend to be somewhat fickle, but more likely, they are moderately submissive and heavily anti-confrontational; they'd rather wish you away than face you. Probably, their fathers tended to be angry-ish men, who were prone to exercising verbal abuse in one form or another. I'd guess that your father and your mother's father probably have similar qualities.

I'm guessing that your mother used to work full time, and you didn't see a whole lot of her; when you did see her, I'd furthermore suppose that she didn't seem to connect to you. She might have been somewhat flighty, and unreliable in following through with the promises she made. This is what I'm guessing-- if I'm horribly wrong, please correct me. If I'm right, however, then this is likely why you keep finding yourself with these women. I promise you that it's not entirely by accident, that you keep getting ignored.



bits and pieces of your Freudian analysis is true, but it's mostly off base. Yes my mom has always worked full time, but she could receive a mom of the year award and there couldn't be anyone else more deserving. I can't count a single incident when she dealt with me that she didn't follow through with a promise. Antonyms for flighty and unreliable would be the most accurate ways to describe her. We got to see her all throughout the summer because she worked in the school district.

Her step dad was the only real positive influence in her life growing up. She barely knew her real dad.

My dad was verbally abusive at times but it wasn't an everyday occurance, and it never went beyond quips.

And this is honestly the truth, I'm not trying to be conflictive to prove you wrong.

As far as the women I've dated:

You could make the argument that I've chosen women with judgmental flaws or overlooked other qualities in favor of a pretty face, but the behavior seems to be prevalent even with the women absent of any major character flaws that I've dated.


On 2008-04-08 22:12, BlaizeYES wrote:

precisely. guys do the same thing, except that girls are usually much more persistent when they begin being "obsessive."

if you meet a girl, have fun for a week, decide to go out, then was suffocating you... wouldnt you want to break away? honestly. think about it rationally. then on top of this, trying to know everything about your past and then "lecture" you on it, even going as far as to continue the conversation she was lecturing you about that you hoped would be buried THE VERY NEXT DAY on the phone on the exact same subject, won't you start to see it as a pretty bland, conflicted "relationship" that really doesn't go anywhere? i think the problem is YOU, MY BOY!


no offense, it's just you have to think of it from both points of view before saying that girls are assholes because how you act as soon as they say you like them



First of all, in the situation you pointed out, I didn't try to know everything about her past. She was very open about her circumstances when we first started dating. Secondly, you define having a "conflicted relationship" because of one simple argument? It was honestly the first real friction we had the whole three weeks we dated before making it official. I don't "suffocate" women as you put it.b

[Kouta_]

This is why I love being gay. http://www.pso-world.com/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_wacko.gif

[Solstis]

On 2008-04-13 01:57, Kouta_ wrote:
This is why I love being gay. http://www.pso-world.com/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_wacko.gif



I think that we've pointed out that boys are just as stupid as girls.

[F-Gattaca]

As bad as this'll make me sound, I'm envious that Hollowtip even got that far with a girl ... because I haven't.

There's a reason for my sig after all.

However, in my experiences I haven't had girls just quietly dissapear on me that I was at least close to forming a relationship with. Instead ... it was always that they'd drop it on me that some other guy stole their heart (they KNEW how I felt about them and felt the same way prior to this), then they'd pat me on the head and say "I'm sure you'll find someone someday!"

After more than ten times of that in a row, that rings as hollow as a bell.

[Seority]

I guess I'll be the first to say I know you're not saying, "ALL GIRLS ARE A-HOLES". You obviously stated also that you know guys act the same way. All you're asking is reasons as to the why.
It can be the same reason for both boys and girls that they are uncomfortable expressing their true feelings, they don't wish to take responsiblity for their own actions, and are just plain our jerks.

Why women do it more is probably because most are grown to not of known how it is to be treated that way. They dont relitivly care if they tell you a reason nor why. They just thought you'd get the idea eventually.
Women also love to lie, be sneaky, and have back-up plans. I spose I'll also state that I KNOW men can be this way to, but it's strange that more women then men do that. I've been through that stage myself. I'll hook up with many men at once and pick who I think is best, then blow the others off. Unlike your experiences, I told the other guys that I no longer wanted to see them, because I can take responsiblity for my actions. Of course the guy would end up ditching me in the end, but still. If my current relationship is going sour, I'll find a date quickly and use that to lean against until things are smoother with my current bf. Do I do that anymore now? No. I found out that never, ever works the way you want it to.
If anything I'd blame a bit of it on the nature of women, were we have to grow up out of it. Another I'd blame is our uprising, but that goes for everyone.

Another thing I'd like to mention is that "not-so-new-anymore rights" of women. To make this simple, a women wants the same respect and rights as men, but still get PO'ed if men don't hold the door for them or pay for the meal. Anyone else think that's annoying? I understand the gentlemen ways that some men pride themselves on, but I say that if you want that special treatment, then you should have only these certian rights. God I'm not saying that we don't deserve the right to vote or anything, but just common courtesy to cook the meals if you don't work, and pay for your own meal if you have your own source of income. Just something to state.

[Powder Keg]

When I meet a girl, get her number or whatever...I'll try twice to make a meetup/date, whatever. If both planned times fall through, then that's it, I don't waste my time anymore. Girls do it a lot.

[Sekani]

On 2008-04-13 13:42, Seority wrote:
Another thing I'd like to mention is that "not-so-new-anymore rights" of women. To make this simple, a women wants the same respect and rights as men, but still get PO'ed if men don't hold the door for them or pay for the meal. Anyone else think that's annoying? I understand the gentlemen ways that some men pride themselves on, but I say that if you want that special treatment, then you should have only these certian rights. God I'm not saying that we don't deserve the right to vote or anything, but just common courtesy to cook the meals if you don't work, and pay for your own meal if you have your own source of income. Just something to state.


It's almost a pet peeve of mine. Also, you're the first woman I've heard say that they actually see a problem with this. Props just on that.

[DreXxiN]

On 2008-04-14 06:48, Sekani wrote:

On 2008-04-13 13:42, Seority wrote:
Another thing I'd like to mention is that "not-so-new-anymore rights" of women. To make this simple, a women wants the same respect and rights as men, but still get PO'ed if men don't hold the door for them or pay for the meal. Anyone else think that's annoying? I understand the gentlemen ways that some men pride themselves on, but I say that if you want that special treatment, then you should have only these certian rights. God I'm not saying that we don't deserve the right to vote or anything, but just common courtesy to cook the meals if you don't work, and pay for your own meal if you have your own source of income. Just something to state.


It's almost a pet peeve of mine. Also, you're the first woman I've heard say that they actually see a problem with this. Props just on that.



I love my woman =).


I think the OP is taking this a bit harshly. You shouldn't be so hurt that you've been neglected by such women that would even think of doing something so rude. Regardless of what others say, it is just common courtesy to let you know if they've lost interest. It shouldn't have to be a riddle or anything of the sort. The "You didn't ask" stuff is bullshit too..

..So you going to be depressed about it? Think of the bright side, would you really want to STAY with something so immature or ignorant as to lay those actions upon you? Live in secrets and fear of her being unfaithful for the rest of her life? Exactly, you don't want that, so move on. Consider the fact that through multiple failures, you are narrowing down possibilities to your "Ideal girlfriends", and can use what you've learned from the failed relationships to prove the one that, hopefully, you'll settle with for the rest of your life.

[enoch]

T theres alot of fish in the see. and jellyfish...and sharks.. all different vareties. most of the m kill you tho >.>

[Seority]

Glad we can agree on something Sekani http://www.pso-world.com/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_wacko.gif

Thanks hun.
http://www.pso-world.com/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/anime1.gif

[F-Gattaca]

On 2008-04-14 13:55, DreXxiN wrote:
I love my woman =).



On 2008-04-15 12:17, Seority wrote:
Thanks hun.
http://www.pso-world.com/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/anime1.gif


Now, if we want to talk about things that'll really tear a lovesick guy's heart in two ... PDA is up there on the list.

[Raine_Loire]

On 2008-04-08 23:12, hollowtip wrote:



On 2008-04-08 22:12, BlaizeYES wrote:

precisely. guys do the same thing, except that girls are usually much more persistent when they begin being "obsessive."

if you meet a girl, have fun for a week, decide to go out, then was suffocating you... wouldnt you want to break away? honestly. think about it rationally. then on top of this, trying to know everything about your past and then "lecture" you on it, even going as far as to continue the conversation she was lecturing you about that you hoped would be buried THE VERY NEXT DAY on the phone on the exact same subject, won't you start to see it as a pretty bland, conflicted "relationship" that really doesn't go anywhere? i think the problem is YOU, MY BOY!


no offense, it's just you have to think of it from both points of view before saying that girls are assholes because how you act as soon as they say you like them



First of all, in the situation you pointed out, I didn't try to know everything about her past. She was very open about her circumstances when we first started dating. Secondly, you define having a "conflicted relationship" because of one simple argument? It was honestly the first real friction we had the whole three weeks we dated before making it official. I don't "suffocate" women as you put it.b



Actually Blaize is right about this... you guys are fighting after 3 weeks (that is NOT A LONG TIME TO GO WITHOUT CONFLICT!), about her PAST which is something that she can't change and you shouldn't have an opinion on, and was open with you about up front... well, she should have said "Look, this relationship isn't heading in a place I want to go, so let's just end it now before we get hurt" rather than "Oops, other call" but really... if something bothers you about her in the beginning- it doesn't go away after a long time together. It gets more and more annoying over time. So while she didn't handle it well, which could just as well be because she's non confrontational rather than just an asshole, or maybe when you were arguing, you frightened her without realizing it, either way, she probably saved you guys a painful path.

[enoch]

On 2008-04-13 13:42, Seority wrote:
I guess I'll be the first to say I know you're not saying, "ALL GIRLS ARE A-HOLES"


correction, all girsl are aliens >.>

[Seority]

On 2008-04-16 07:08, enoch wrote:
correction, all girsl are aliens >.>


correction, all humans have flaws


@F-Gattaca:
Cuz when you're in love with someone, you're not supposed to let anyone else know? lol
Also, I didn't notice any real PDA things like kisses or hugs. Just, the terms, 'my girl', and 'hun'.
Just pointing out =)

[F-Gattaca]

By the same token, do you think your love is only valid when you make sure EVERYONE who can see or hear you knows it?

To people who have had seriously bad luck in romance, that kind of thing can come off as flaunting or even gloating. I know my sentiments are not rare because people wouldn't cynically call Valentine's Day "Singles Awareness Day" if that were the case.

[Raine_Loire]

On 2008-04-17 05:09, F-Gattaca wrote:
By the same token, do you think your love is only valid when you make sure EVERYONE who can see or hear you knows it?

To people who have had seriously bad luck in romance, that kind of thing can come off as flaunting or even gloating. I know my sentiments are not rare because people wouldn't cynically call Valentine's Day "Singles Awareness Day" if that were the case.



LOL don't get all worked up over it! Drex and Seority are just kids and that's just how kids are.

In my experience it's mostly insecure people who do that, though. Personally, Laguna and I prefer to NOT make people uncomfortable around us, so we make fun of each other when we're around other people. Good times, good times.

[Seority]

Acctually we refain from doing it a lot. If you hung with both of us, and didn't know, you'd say we were friends.

I personally like it that way.

Kids? Wow. These "adults" will never understand. *heads off to college like adults would*
http://www.pso-world.com/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_razz.gif

[panzer_unit]

On 2008-04-15 14:04, F-Gattaca wrote:
Now, if we want to talk about things that'll really tear a lovesick guy's heart in two ... PDA is up there on the list.

I hear ya, but this is teh internets... "use at your own risk"

[enoch]

PDA? o.o all i know is that it kills at school, especially here. we cant even give hugs anymore......sorry my hippie friends T.T I will mss your hippie hugs

[thunder-ray]

Oh really then what is it that *adults* will never understand?


<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: thunder-ray on 2008-04-18 08:40 ]</font>

[DreXxiN]

Why did this stray off topic?

And sorry, Gattaca. It just comes out, I'll try to be a bit more considerate, but just remember, as recently said, it's the internet.

It's like saying you are afraid of peaches...but go on the internet and say people are inconsiderate for peach sales coming off as popups...

Except not...

Nevermind..


In the same aspect however, I'd lock yourself in your house and never stare out the windows if a form of affection between opposite sex's hurts you, or seek professional help. (I'm being serious, I'm not trying to mock you or anything)


<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: DreXxiN on 2008-04-18 16:52 ]</font>

[rogue_robot]

Seriously, Gattaca, you really are taking this one a little too harshly. I mean, geez, I'm a lonely guy myself, and PDA in any form does build up those pangs of envy in me, too, but damn, man, try to take at least a little cheer from seeing that it still is even possible for two people of the opposite sexes to be happy together, or, at the very least, reign the envy in and try not to make every couple you encounter feel guilty about their happiness.

[Seority]

What adults don't understand:
Just because someones younger then you, doesn't mean that they know less then you do. Also, if someone is your age, doesn't mean they have the same intelligence you do.

I believe you already know that, but just because you're 20 something and I'm 18, doesn't mean I can't understand things the way you do.

This is why age doesn't matter at all.

[enoch]

lol ;o does expirience count then? most people believe adults are smarter because they have more expierience. but a person of 16 can have more expierience than a person of 60 based on situation.

also teens have umm >.>"""" raging hormones.....

[BlaizeYES]

experience counts for a good majority of everything, but only as much as what you've gathered and learned from it. if you've learned nothing from anything in your life, you havent grown as a person at all, and the experience was completely meaningless. and stop with the "girls are aliens" shit. jesus. if your friends came up with that "saying," tell them to come up with something a little more original.

[thunder-ray]

Seority I agree with you 100% and just incase I wasent asking u that question cuz I was pissed over your other comment. I just wanted to see what you would say if i asked you that question and you pretty much said what I felt to. Also for the record since you told me your age im 22 years old >.>. Where not very much far off but I dont view a person's exp based on age anyways. Thanks for replying my question ^_^

[F-Gattaca]

It's funny, really. I spend a little time away from the forums and ... well. It's quite something to see Drexxin saying I'm the mentally instable/insecure one, make some kind of strange analogy involving peaches, then tell me I should become a hermit if I can't stand it. Oh, and for rogue_robot to chime in saying I'm taking it way too harshly while saying I shouldn't be raining on their parade. I can understand you guys might be ticked off with Raine_Loire saying that only kids seek to announce their relationship to the world (and having seen much older couples be obnoxious with their romance, I don't agree with her on that), but to think this started from a brief observation using Drexxin and Seority's exchanges in this thread as an example ...

Oh well. The issue's been pressed, so I stand by what I said earlier:

Love isn't something validated by going out of your way to flaunt it to everyone who so much as sees you.

You can tell me to lock myself up in my room and become a hermit, to check myself into a mental hospital, or that I'm the one with the problem and that I'm a bad person for making people who are in love feel guilty about it, but I know for a fact I'm not the only person in the world who feels this way. It's not a sign of mental illness to be made uncomfortable, put off, or depressed by a couple determined to broadcast their love to everyone around them, and those reactions to PDA are not the domain of bitter singles who hate couples and romance. Far from it. (Besides, if I hated love--as a certain couple here tried to imply--why would I be lovesick?)

I also know that singles aren't the only ones who have that same idea; Raine_Loire proved it, acknowledging that she is in a relationship herself but knows that it makes people uncomfortable to get their PDA on. I've met other couples in the past with the same feelings about obnoxious public displays--yes, other couples, thinking that making a point of getting lovey-dovey in public was a turn-off. I guess they should seek professional help too, huh? *shakes head sadly*

Some of you said "it's the internet" in response; who said I was speaking strictly about the internet here? This is as much as--if not more of--an occurence in real life. Though, yes, it's become something of a convention for couples who play MMOs to broadcast it on forums through their signatures/posts or in-game.

Coincidentially, a few days ago I saw Drexxin and Seority AFK-hugging right next to the recharge cube in Holtes City East, Uni 02. Normally I wouldn't have said anything about this except, well, I think it illustrates my point considering how the two have acted in this thread (and their signatures). There comes a point where it seems less like you guys are doing it because you love each other, and more because you want everyone else to know about it for whatever reason--especially by planting yourself in a place that you know is frequented for whatever reason.

(And yes, despite Uni 02 being mostly concentrated at Pavillion of Air, I was able to find a party at Holtes East and found people running through on their way to wherever, or recharging.)

----


On 2008-04-17 06:12, Raine_Loire wrote:
LOL don't get all worked up over it! Drex and Seority are just kids and that's just how kids are.

In my experience it's mostly insecure people who do that, though. Personally, Laguna and I prefer to NOT make people uncomfortable around us, so we make fun of each other when we're around other people. Good times, good times.



On 2008-04-17 11:06, panzer_unit wrote:
I hear ya, but this is teh internets... "use at your own risk"



On 2008-04-18 16:50, DreXxiN wrote:
Why did this stray off topic?

And sorry, Gattaca. It just comes out, I'll try to be a bit more considerate, but just remember, as recently said, it's the internet.

It's like saying you are afraid of peaches...but go on the internet and say people are inconsiderate for peach sales coming off as popups... Except not... Nevermind..

In the same aspect however, I'd lock yourself in your house and never stare out the windows if a form of affection between opposite sex's hurts you, or seek professional help. (I'm being serious, I'm not trying to mock you or anything)



On 2008-04-18 19:43, rogue_robot wrote:
Seriously, Gattaca, you really are taking this one a little too harshly. I mean, geez, I'm a lonely guy myself, and PDA in any form does build up those pangs of envy in me, too, but damn, man, try to take at least a little cheer from seeing that it still is even possible for two people of the opposite sexes to be happy together, or, at the very least, reign the envy in and try not to make every couple you encounter feel guilty about their happiness.


<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: F-Gattaca on 2008-04-19 15:52 ]</font>

[Raine_Loire]

On 2008-04-19 15:31, F-Gattaca wrote:
I can understand you guys might be ticked off with Raine_Loire saying that only kids seek to announce their relationship to the world (and having seen much older couples be obnoxious with their romance, I don't agree with her on that)


I didn't say ONLY kids are like that- I just said that that's why THEY were like that. It's what my friends and I call SO high school.

I gave another explanation though- insecurity. A lot of people who don't have a lot of experience in relationships like to act overly lovey dovey, to make themselves feel better when they ARE in one. That would most likely be the older people you mentioned http://www.pso-world.com/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif

[Seority]

Well if we were to sit appart from each other, people would mail us asking, "ARE YOU GUYZ OVER???" Then we'd be getting hit on by many randoms who think we are just for that.
Using your example, we can't just stop sitting together to make you feel better about not having another, nor are we sitting together to piss people like you off. It's something that couples do. You hold hands when you walk together. You kiss when you think the time is right. Etc.
I remember being single and seeing others like us now. Did it piss me off? No. Did I get offended? No. Did I get lovesick? Yes! But only because it's natural. I'm not going to go home and cry about it. I did something about it. Hang with friends, play games, etc.
PDA is nothing offensive nor wrong. (Having sex in a public place is not PDA. That is a whole other subject, which I do find disturbing.)


Oh! You're welcome thunder. Forgot to add that. I didn't think you were upset at me, but could tell you wanted me to answer the question XD.


<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Seority on 2008-04-21 11:43 ]</font>

[BlaizeYES]

On 2008-04-19 12:32, enoch wrote:
sorry, i didnt know it offended anybody, here I will just hide it in a spoiler box so you dont have to look at it >.>"




lol, it isnt offensive. it's just a dumb "saying" that i heard in like 5th grade and you just keep butchering the clever wording of a 10 year old. no offense, it just doesnt need to be repeated every few posts. it's like the "girls dont poop" one that i used to hear back in highschool, it really doesnt add anything to conversation. its just retarded.


and on a side note, public displays of affection are just an image booster to make sure people see how "happy" you are with a person, and i don't tolerate it at all. and the ones that are big on "public affection," don't use the excuse "why should we care what other people around us think? we do it because WE DONT CARE"... because you care more about image than the others that dont show it around a group of friends. in a relationship, we can joke around together, given her sense of humor, if its good or not. but with other people, what we do privately does not apply when we're with other friends... and its ESPECIALLY not a reason to even get MORE AFFECTIONATE because of other people watching. i dated a girl for about 2 weeks like that. when we'd get in public, suddenly she would try to hold my hand, act like we're in the conversation together, and when i'd be talking, she did this thing where she'd be hugging me and looking up at me, making some sort of pouting face, like shes some sort of dog, and i just couldn't take it. i HATE ANIMALS. and because of what i associated with her when she would act like some mutt desperate for my attention around other people, she didnt make the cut.

LET IT BE KNOWN: if you try to make attempts at flaunting your relationship with me, i will RIP IT OFF LIKE A LEECH.


jesus it is GORGEOUS OUTSIDE TODAY



<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: BlaizeYES on 2008-04-22 10:53 ]</font>

[enoch]

girls dont poop...i think I just found my new catch phrase!

jk

it makes me laugh inside though, i guess you just had to expirience what I did with a girl
I thought I knew everything about her then its like WTF PLANET ARE YOU FROM?!?!?!?!?!?

[Raine_Loire]

On 2008-04-21 13:14, BlaizeYES wrote:

On 2008-04-19 12:32, enoch wrote:
sorry, i didnt know it offended anybody, here I will just hide it in a spoiler box so you dont have to look at it >.>"




lol, it isnt offensive. it's just a dumb "saying" that i heard in like 5th grade and you just keep butchering the clever wording of a 10 year old. no offense, it just doesnt need to be repeated every few posts. it's like the "girls dont poop" one that i used to hear back in highschool, it really doesnt add anything to conversation. its just retarded.


and on a side note, public displays of affection are just an image booster to make sure people see how "happy" you are with a person, and i don't tolerate it at all. and the ones that are big on "public affection," don't use the excuse "why should we care what other people around us think? we do it because WE DONT CARE"... because you care more about image than the others that dont show it around a group of friends. in a relationship, we can joke around together, given her sense of humor, if its good or not. but with other people, what we do privately does not apply when we're with other friends... and its ESPECIALLY not a reason to even get MORE AFFECTIONATE because of other people watching. i dated a girl for about 2 weeks like that. when we'd get in public, suddenly she would try to hold my hand, act like we're in the conversation together, and when i'd be talking, she did this thing where she'd be hugging me and looking up at me, making some sort of pouting face, like shes some sort of dog, and i just couldn't take it. i HATE ANIMALS. and because of what i associated with her when she would act like some mutt desperate for my attention around other people, she didnt make the cut.

LET IT BE KNOWN: if you try to make attempts at flaunting your relationship with me, i will RIP IT OFF LIKE A LEECH.


jesus it is GORGEOUS OUTSIDE TODAY



<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: BlaizeYES on 2008-04-22 10:53 ]</font>


I agree with everything you just said... except... It's not gorgeous outside here, it's cold and snow flurries.

I hate sounding cynical, it goes against my deeply romantic nature... But there are some people you just have to sit back and laugh to yourself when they speak (or post if it's on the internet) because you know what they're heading for and warnings don't work for anyone.

[Morganna]

Best way to deal with relationships is to maintain an inner sense of control. Do not make the first move. If she really wants you, then she will let you know. Sure, maybe she might not, but then do you really want someone with no confidence anyway?

In any case, in a relationship, make it clear that you have already freed her. If you love someone, set her free. This means that you are free, as well. You do not have to fear her disapproval, or crave her approval.

[enoch]

On 2008-04-22 13:42, Raine_Loire wrote:
-snip- for space
I hate sounding cynical, it goes against my deeply romantic nature... But there are some people you just have to sit back and laugh to yourself when they speak (or post if it's on the internet) because you know what they're heading for and warnings don't work for anyone.



oh so sad and true >.< speaking of course of myself....



<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: HAYABUSA-FMW- on 2008-04-24 19:38 ]</font>