I am alone now...

[MetaZedlen]

(Not just about one person...)

As I look at what is going on right now in my life, there is NOBODY that I can talk to or hang out with anymore...

1. My best buddy is in jail for a shit reason
2. The girl I wanted is with someone else
3. One of my other buddies is being really emo right now for some stupid fucking reasons (let's just say that he can't get over stupid shit, such as a kid he barely knew not talking to him anymore on MYSPACE, and he acts like the world is coming to an end...)
4. None of my other friends SEEM to have time to talk or hang with me...

Damn, I don't know where it all went wrong, but it is a bitch right now, and I feel like I'm going through another depression... (which I sure as FUCK don't want ever again...)

Side-note: Sorry if you guys think that I am making too many topics about me, but there is nowhere else to go... and I have to get this shit off of my back.

[Sinue_v2]

Wow.

Sucks to be you huh?

I dunno about #1, but #'s 2,3, & 4 all seem to have the same root cause. Maybe you should look into that.

[Kylie]

I know how it feels, but it's nothing to get down and out about. Make sure you're doing all you can to make friends and to be around your existing ones. If that doesn't work, at least you can say you tried. Last thing you need to do is feel sorry for yourself.

[Aisha379]

Sinue kinda has a point, even if he does kinda come off as a prick in saying it.

You don't have some kind of attitude or odd problems thats pushing people away, to your knowledge, do you?

[The_Gio]

but being alone is the best way to be...no im not trying to lie to you...my whole life, from kindergarden to where i am now,a "super senior" cuz im stupid lol i have been alone. Its taught me you dont need anyone but yourself. You got your thoughts, your motives, your life. thats all that should matter and no one should tell you differently. Only recently i have actually started to get friends and all that stuff, it just makes me realize, i can understand why some people think its horrible to live without any of it, but really when it comes down to having a relationship, having someone to talk to, its all a bonus in the end, that none of it is necessary to live

[TheOneHero]

With all due respect Gio, I've lived the majority of my life alone as well; but I've always felt "complete" when in a relationship. To me at least, you connect with them on a much deeper level than your other friends, even the "best" ones.

Please tell me Zed, that your friend warrants being called emo. It always bothers me when someone calls another person emo just because they want to talk about how they're feeling or are in a rut. :???:

[Sinue_v2]

Sinue kinda has a point, even if he does kinda come off as a prick in saying it.

You don't have some kind of attitude or odd problems thats pushing people away, to your knowledge, do you?

Yeah, being a prick is kind of my specialty.

I suppose I'll put it another way.

There's an African philosophy called Ubuntu, which one of it's precepts are that the only way to gauge your own humanity is to see it reflected back in others. OP's humanity is being reflected back at him, and he's not liking what he sees. Rather than seek false pity on the internet by people who don't know him, perhaps he should do something to change his personality - or barring that, at least the people he surrounds himself with.

[The_Gio]

With all due respect Gio, I've lived the majority of my life alone as well; but I've always felt "complete" when in a relationship. To me at least, you connect with them on a much deeper level than your other friends, even the "best" ones.


thank you for at least being respectful...like i said tho, i can see how people would think its horrible to live without that type of thing, and i agree with you, it sucks ass to not have anyone, but at that point, what else are you gonna do? curl up in a ball and not do anything, or just accept whats what and live on, with that said, im not saying to just say, OH WELL THIS TYPE OF STUFF HAPPENS, i know its hard and it requires time to get to that point and just be glad you even got to experience something as grand. this very friday, i spent my night with a girl ive been admiring for a while now, and i spent the whole night not believing where i was or that what was happening is actually happening, from what i felt that night, i see why people would get depressed or bothered when they have something like that everyday and then get it torn away without any consideration of them. Im just saying...that...alot of things in life looked at like a necessity, really are only a necessity because you see other people have them everyday, that doesnt mean it is needed to live, it just means its in abundance, and probably for the wrong reasons. Sex being the number 1 on the list.

[Aisha379]

Yeah, being a prick is kind of my specialty.

I suppose I'll put it another way.

There's an African philosophy called Ubuntu, which one of it's precepts are that the only way to gauge your own humanity is to see it reflected back in others. OP's humanity is being reflected back at him, and he's not liking what he sees. Rather than seek false pity on the internet by people who don't know him, perhaps he should do something to change his personality - or barring that, at least the people he surrounds himself with.

Yeah, I kinda knew what you meant and agree to an extent.

You worded it better than I could though =S


Of course, it is still simply possible that you have just run into a rut of bad luck / bad choices in friends, Zedlen.

[Zarode]

Sometimes, being alone is best. It gives you a lot of time to reflect upon yourself and find ways to improve yourself, with no distractions from friends/family.


Sure, it sounds cold hearted, but it certainly sounds like you could use some time to yourself.

[MetaZedlen]

@Sinue: Oww on your first post... but (this also goes with Aisha) if I were to change my personality, everybody would KNOW that something is up, my friends know who I am, and they would think that something is up if I were to change like that, and as far as I can think, I don't think I have any attitude problems. Also, I'm not trying to get youguys to feel sorry for me (Sinue), I just find this place to be a refuge that actually has intelligent people to talk to about situations (yes, my family sucks that much to have to talk to random people). Oh yea, about #1, he "stole" a camera from an ex (she was a psycho obessive bitch to begin with), and the cops showed up at the place he was staying, but he also had a bench warrant (now that I remember), so he got canned for that...

@The Gio: My mentality used to be like yours, I loved being alone, but after I moved away from the shithole town I was in, I started making a lot of friends, and now it is kinda hard to take hold of the problems I am having right now...

@TheOneHero: Everybody else that has contact with him knows that he is NOWHERE near the person he used to be, such as the "problem" I stated.
Now, I'm not saying that he can't be like this at all, because his idiotic parents kicked him out of his house because they were afraid that he was going to be just like his sister (who has "fuck-up" written ALL over her), but for some other reasons that I really wouldn't like to explain for his privacy, but let's just say that he can't live in the NOW, he can't be responsible for himself, he complains about not having gas money even though he pisses it away on fucking WoW...
He isn't one to be practical with his money at ALL... (If you want more, PM me)

*exhales* there, I think that should be the answers everyone is looking for.

[Sinue_v2]

My suggestion is not to completely overhaul your personality and pretend to be someone you are not for the sake of keeping friends. My opinion of you thus far is already pretty low, but it would be far, far more contemptible for you to be so dishonest as to lie to yourself and everybody else by denying who you truly are for the sake of other people's superficial affection. I'm only suggesting that you take cues from the ways your friends behave around you to inflect upon yourself as a means of identifying and rectifying personal iniquities you may not even know exist - but are none-the-less unhappy about. Perhaps you are not already being true to yourself, and others are picking up on that and dismissing you for it. Get in touch with yourself. Grow a pair of balls, and grow as a person. You can change many, many times over the course of your life - but you will always be yourself.

If growing in such a manner leads you away from your former friends or interests, then so be it. It wasn't leading you to happiness anyhow. Friends come and go. Lovers come and go. You will always be yourself, so be true to it - because you are truly the only person with the power to make yourself happy. Who you are, your word, and your convictions are all that you have in this world. So fucking stand by them, identify your humanity, affirm yourself in it, and seek out those who appreciate who you are. Alot of people still won't like you, even current or former friends. Fuck em, and be comfortable with that.

As an aside, I never got the impression that you were trying to make others feel sorry for you. I only got the impression that you were trying to feel sorry for yourself, and were trying to validate your reasons for feeling sorry for yourself in the cheap words of internet strangers.

[The_Gio]

hmm well its not that i love being alone...its just not a big deal to be...like i said, its not that i only rely on myself, i love having people around me...but to be alone isnt that bad either, like Zarode said, it gives you time to not only reflect, but to get your stuff straight and see what went wrong. The problem with that is people sink into depression when they see the only ones to blame are themselves...but people get depressed because they dont know what to do. I honestly dont blame you for being the way you are right now (if you really want my sympathy) but what im trying to tell you is you gotta look to the future cus living in the past doesnt help you move forward. And im trying to make you see that by giving some personal things ive experienced myself...you'll be fine. just be glad your not like me, I get caught up in this type of stuff too. I wait for someone to ask me if im fine and just get worse when no one does. But once i give up on people again, something good happens which causes the whole time of being pissed pointless.....

you'll be fine...

[MetaZedlen]

Sinue, my mentality about this kind of thing has ALWAYS been like you stated, I don't worry about what has happened in the past, because I know that I can't fix it, I just live with it and move on to what is going on now, it's just that this particular topic is what's going on now and I just talk about this kind of stuff to get it off of my chest. Also, I know that it is plain stupid if you feel sorry for yourself, I know what it was like, and I don't do it to myself because I just try to forget it and move on.

I don't live in the past, because I know that I could be missing things that are happening right now, and I'm not just saying this, this is who I am.

[Vanzazikon]

If you really do follow your own wordsI know that it is plain stupid if you feel sorry for yourself, I know what it was like, and I don't do it to myself because I just try to forget it and move on.

I don't live in the past, because I know that I could be missing things that are happening right now, and I'm not just saying this, this is who I am.then the fact that you started this topic is ironic. You said you started it to get it off your chest, if you were to get it off your chest then this method would have been the opposite approach. It seemed you created this topic because you were confused on what to do and how to handle these type of issues.

When I see your topic, it seems like you wanted to share your grievous issues in life with us, however people suggested why you suffered these issues and then you say you are none of that, then you gave reason why you posted it. You posted here because this website (accoriding to you) is a refuge for situations where intelligent people can look into them and give suggestions on how to cope with them. After more suggestions were given you say you are none of that again and now the reason is you want to get this off your chest. If you were none of those suggested and you know who you are then why is it you posted this topic? Because many of the suggestions listed were pretty good advice.