Pigs in a tree.

[Lance813]

If there are 42 pigs in a tree and you eat 12 of them how long do you have until 75 apples in the pen oink?

But more importantly, If you step on 6 ant hills in the middle of December by August, if there are 23 ant hills to begin with, what is the number of times that I have tied my shoes since the day I learned?

..and last but not least, If Brad Pitt was cross-breed with a waterbuffalo how many otters would be at Seaworld?

[Dhylec]

that tree better be hueg or those pigz are tiny ;3

[Meyfei]

the answer is 1

[Volcompat321]

Pigs in a blanket?

[Lance813]

If a hueg tree is hueg or the pigs are small than the answer IS 1. Now the question to that answer is if there are 7 blankets that cover the 42 pigs in the hueg tree how many branches does a Redwood in south-east Tacoma have? If the number of branches is less than 3 start from square one, rinse, and repeat.

[Volcompat321]

=1,211,435 HAC
See what I did there?

[Lance813]

If the HAC, Hats Around Cats, does equal 1,211,435 than what I did there you must have seen. Although, since your calcuation was wrong it just proves the fact that the pigs do not fit into a blanket. Finally, you did not see what I did there only because you are blind to the facts that the pigs in fore-mentioned blanket are equal to the number 42.

[Volcompat321]

Pigs fit in a blanket, which fits in an oven, which eventually goes into a mans mouth, which eventually goes over a drink, which eventually comes out.
Also, 1,211,435 divided by the number of pigs you originally had equals to roughly 28,844 pigs in a blanket.
In order to get a blanket that big, you would need 17,000 hours of 100 people sewing 24 hours a day.
In roughly 709 days, you can have 28,844 pigs in a blanket.
28,884 pigs in a blanket equals to about 11,553,600 pounds, which equals about 5,776 tons.
So, which weighs more, the 28,884 pigs, or the blanket?

[Volcompat321]

By the way, 1,211,435 HAC =




Lance813, which equals the answer to the first riddle question.

[Lance813]

No that is incorrect. For you are godmodding.

The HAC is something that was created by a maggot therefore the maggotry must equal the square root of a maggot. The square root of said maggot must be a derivitive of its weight. Now that the false cheese has been burnt by the real cat in pink-stripped pajamas the thread can continue. So please Volcompat321 enough of your false assumptions and look to the north and open your eyes.

Now on with the intelectual theories. If a cow in outer space gets milked by a moon farmer how much milk does the cow give per hour if the gravity on the moon equals 5.7 m/s versus the 9.8 gravity that earth has?

How many cakes could you make with forementioned space milk?

[Volcompat321]

You've stumped me with your "logic".

[Meyfei]

the answer:
The milk wouldn't fall into the bucket so you get none.
thus The cake is indeed a lie!

0

[Lance813]

Ah my dear, you are half way there. You got the '0' but what about the 42?

If cattle in Seattle were to wage a war against ox in Oxford how many chickens crossed highway 75?

If at least 1 chicken made it across with out being trampled into a bloody pulp by tires and treads than the milk did not enter the bucket.

But seeing as 42 is always the answer the milk did enter the bucket. Therefore the gravity must be the same on the moon must be the same on the earth, 42.

Now, if you have any questions please see the door.

Next hypothesis.

32 inmates escape from a local jail. If 13 are mauled on the way out by dogs how many are missed? Well, you have to take into account the families of fore-mentioned inmates. Were they married, did they have kids?

Now, if the rest of the inmates make it to Mexico and escape the law are they still missed by family, etc?

It the total number of missed dead inmates is higher than the total number of live inmates in Mexico then the escape was a success. If not, than you have some pretty sad people.

Sad people need medicine. If the families of the inmates needed perscription Zoloft after the failed/won attempt divied by their health care benefits equals less than 1 they are all fucked.

Work this out.

[Meyfei]

the answer
is

the chickens were blinded, and the tires were flat, the highway was a walking path and milk went sour.
Answer: 4

The dogs were hallucinating, all inmates stayed, 3 were released and only 1 was missed.
answer: 1.42

[Outrider]

If you were skiing down a mountain and one of the wheels broke off, would it still take the same amount of flapjacks to wallpaper a doghouse?

Actually, the answer is purple, because ice cream doesn't have any bones.


I've got that entire thing memorized and I can't remember why or where it came from (although I think it came from some sort of shenanigans way back in high school).

[Lance813]

GOD DAMMIT!

Someone finally gets it. Sir, I congratulate you!

To the rest of you... I am disappoint. :disapprove: