SEVEN 【Chapter 6 posted 11.10.11】

[CupOfCoffee]

,,,,,,

[Xaeris]

A new story already? You have a problem. Seek help.

...

I'll read it with glee, later.

[qoxolg]

Awesome! very different from spaceman, but also very awesome! I keep wanting to read more of it!

Make sure to let me know if you want me to draw/paint stuff from the story :D

[McLaughlin]

If he's got a problem, I hope he never finds the solution.

Again, I have been hooked.

[McLaughlin]

I really dig this. Great read.

[AzureBlaze]

Reading along, going great so far!

But, I've got to ask: is Perry Mason named after Perry Mason the defense attorney famous detective from a long time ago books & TV shows? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Perry_Mason It seems to remain an iconic name, though it's old now.

[Seth Astra]

Just saw this. Looks like it's gonna be pretty darned exciting. *Goes to subscribe*

[ZombieCoffee]

Well, the subscribing went disastrously. My whole account exploded in the process. Hopefully Ryna already used his (her?) health kit and decided to grab that defib unit I saw a ways back.

[McLaughlin]

I'm sure that's really frustrating, but I just can't help laughing.

I blame your mastery of description.

[Seth Astra]

Lol. Glad you're alive. *Pulls out a revolver*

[McLaughlin]

http://www.tattoodonkey.com/pics/-/w/-warning-trespassers-will-be-shot-survivors-again-e-g-tattoodonkey.com.jpg

[McLaughlin]

I think you've got that country-bumpkin dialect down pat.

Great read as always.

[Seth Astra]

Good chapter. I love logging in during lunch to see a new fanfic chapter.

[qoxolg]

Awesome read :D

I think these kind of mash-ups are great. It creates possibilities tone creative, yet everyone that reads recognizes the subject.

Also society/culture can change all ways, and it doesn't always move forward (dark ages in Europe anyone?)

Although I do visual art, I've been thinking of mashing-up PSO with steampunk and that kind of stuff.

[Xaeris]

It's interesting to imagine a series of events that would lead the futuristic setting of Pioneer 2 to regressing into the more rugged and primitive one being portrayed in the story. It almost seems ludicrous that society could lose the progress of milllenia in a few short decades, but given a force large enough to take out that inertia (say, a megalomaniac corporation), it's plausible, leaving one to wonder what it was they did, exactly.

[McLaughlin]

And the plot thickens. Great stuff.

[Seth Astra]

(Insert intellegent-sounding compliment here).

What? I'm tired!

[blace]

Interesting chapter and as always, hoping to see another well on its way.

Nice use of the foreshadowing at the beginning.

[McLaughlin]

Great chapter. You really have a way with speeches.

[McLaughlin]

One question though; aren't the Hunters six strong? Nick, Laurel, Pris, Canaan, Penny, and Mason? Or has Mason not truly committed yet?

[McLaughlin]

I see I see. Hurry up and post the next chapter, haha. (Yes, I am a mega-hypocrite)

[Xaeris]

I think I have you beat on that front.


Sometimes that was a weakness and sometimes it was a strength, and sometimes it was both—for different reasons, in different ways.

I really like this sentence. It does, like, a loop de loop. Sometimes, I trip over your prose (that's more me than you, I think) and have to reread a passage for comprehension, but the things like that we get out of it make it worth it.

[Seth Astra]

It's been days since this came out and I still haven't said anything about it....

Anything about it.

^^;

[qoxolg]

Just to let you know I am still enjoying the story :D

[blace]

Aside from several spelling mistakes near the beginning, it's starting to look rather dark. Was wondering when things were getting, glad to see it's not too far off to see what fate has in store for this quiet sleepy town.

[blace]

In the nightmare sequence you misspelled daisies. I need to get a computer attempting to find any other errors.

[McLaughlin]

Great chapter. Was not expecting Emily to nearly separate that guy's head from his shoulders.

[Xaeris]

I don't like Emily. As a person, not as a character mind you, if that makes sense. It's a wee bit nutters to challenge someone to a knife throwing match to the death over a close call. Pride being srs business is hardly a new thing in literature, but in this case, I felt myself squirm just a smidge when she buried that dagger in the poor dude's throat. And his reaction, "no one told me sharp objects did this!" was a nice bit of description.

On a side note, it appears my typo disease is contagious.

[Xaeris]

Hey. Hey. You. Yeah, you. Stop slacking.

[McLaughlin]

That's a bummer, but I understand.

[Xaeris]

That's unfortunate, but I do understand. Sometimes, it feels like writing a chapter is rolling a boulder up a hill and it's just exhausting. It was a good run while it lasted. Still planning on writing a fan contest entry?

[Xaeris]

Yup. I'm going to have to work quickly to make the submission date, but I will. I'm also having trouble choosing a memory though. I've got plenty of them, but it's an issue of picking one I can make an interesting story out of.

[McLaughlin]

I think I've got the one I want to write about picked out. The question now is whether or not my mediocre writing skills will do it justice. Really wish I could draw, ha.

[McLaughlin]

That is very true. The artists around here are majorly talented. I just wish I could manage better than stick people, haha. Sometimes, I feel like a scene would be better described as a picture, as opposed to text. Of course, the inverse can be true as well.

[Xaeris]

I'm not expecting a competition out of the literary field. ...Okay, wow, no, that sounds horribly arrogant. What I mean is that I don't expect every entry in the gallery to be read by the forum goers. I figure a good chunk of the votes will be based on who's friends with who more than anything else.

I have a bit more hope for the judge's panel, but ultimately, I'm not expecting a win here.

[McLaughlin]

Does that Graffiti app still exist? I found it pretty amusing, but when they changed the layout for the umpteenth time a lot of those wall apps kind of disappeared.