The Allos Trial

[SpikeOtacon]

The court of PSOW's FK is now in session. All rise for the honorable Judge Bradicus.

[Bradicus]

*enters*
please state the case bailiff Spike.

[SpikeOtacon]

Today, we shall be evaluating the evidence laid against DTPA commander Allos. According to sources, he has, over the years, raped FK no0bs feet, and stolen various undergarments from other DTPA member's living quarters. YOU, as the members of the jury are here to determine wether or not this man, **points to Allos** is guilty.
Allos, your opening statement.

[Shattered_weasel]

As Allos lawyer i would like to have some tie alone with my client.

*to Allos*

pay me now ho

[Allos]

You're not my lawyer! Where's Kiz!?!??!?


Anyway, I would just like to say that I, in fact, did not rape the noob's foot. I point the blame on Ketchup. I vaguely remember him being on the forums on the night of the crime. The bastard is trying to put me in jail. If you ask me, I think he payed the mods to turn a blind eye. Before we begin the examinations, I would like to add that the judge may have a promotion in store for him in the near future.

[Bradicus]

Hmmm... these are serious charges, and i want a fair trial. I will not have anyone turning this court.. er chatroom into a circus. We will now have the prosecution's opening statement.

since Allos doesnt want you as his lawyer, i guess you can prosecute, Shattered.

[Allos]

Shattered has nothing to do with this.

[SpikeOtacon]

Actually, your honor, Ketchup has offered to be the Procecution.

[Bradicus]

*smacks gavel*
you will keep yourselves under control... very well, ketchup will prosecute, whatever.

[Allos]

And I quote from South Park



"I said stop screwin around! You screw around too much!"

[Bradicus]

the accused will refrain from quoting >:(


The prosecution's opening statements?

[SpikeOtacon]

**takes seat in jury box**

[Allos]

*Looks to see that the jury is made of all DTPA members*

http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif

[Bradicus]

hmmm... i guess the prosecution hasnt showed up yet, so lets hear the defence.

[Ketchup345]

On 2003-11-22 17:37, Allos wrote:
You're not my lawyer! Where's Kiz!?!??!?


Anyway, I would just like to say that I, in fact, did not rape the noob's foot. I point the blame on Ketchup. I vaguely remember him being on the forums on the night of the crime. The bastard is trying to put me in jail. If you ask me, I think he payed the mods to turn a blind eye. Before we begin the examinations, I would like to add that the judge may have a promotion in store for him in the near future.


I was not on the forums the night of the rapes.

I was nowhere near the Fresh Kills Forum when any possible "foot rapes" took place. Allos was here (he never posts outside of Fresh Kills). Allos has tried to rape my foot when I first came, and also has attempeted to on Cheatachu72 and DrunkenPine. He is Also the leader of a world-wide terrorist organization, and cruelty to pants (that's next trial; I'll organize that one) who have been known to plot attacks on pants around the world and especially in major cities, such as New York. Allos is also against new posters to this forum, making several topics such as this one. (http://www.pso-world.com/viewtopic.php?topic=69904&forum=14&61)

I also move that this case be moved to have the judge and jury contain people who do not regularly post in FK or are a member of the DTPA or ADTPA, since the jury and the judge are biased towards Allos, as they are all members of the DTPA; and their position and life are on the line depending on how they vote.

[Bradicus]

A bit late, but whatever.... i am not biased. I act as a fair unblackmailed judge!

lets hear the defence.

[SpikeOtacon]

**bailiff stands up**
Your honor, the defence attorny is a bit late.

[Shattered_weasel]

I HAVE EVERY THING TO DO WITH THIS THINGY....because i am law

*Shoots Allos*

oops

[Ketchup345]

On 2003-11-22 18:09, Shattered_weasel wrote:
I HAVE EVERY THING TO DO WITH THIS THINGY....because i am law
*Shoots Allos*
oops


Allos is dead, so I guess no need to go on with the trial. Bradicus, you are now the leader of the DTPA.



<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Ketchup345 on 2003-11-22 18:12 ]</font>

[Bradicus]

im flabbergasted...























really, i am.

[Shattered_weasel]

*shoots Ketchup*

no more of you either

[Ketchup345]

On 2003-11-22 18:14, Shattered_weasel wrote:
*shoots Ketchup*
no more of you either


No, no, really, I think I'll be fine, I'll pull through.

[Allos]

I was not on the forums the night of the rapes.

I was nowhere near the Fresh Kills Forum when any possible "foot rapes" took place. Allos was here (he never posts outside of Fresh Kills). Allos has tried to rape my foot when I first came, and also has attempeted to on Cheatachu72 and DrunkenPine.


Lies. I do post outside of FK (but not as often as i used to). I never tried to rape your foot, and I declare perjury of you! And i have also never heard of those two. DNA and semen samples will prove my innocence. True, I have made anti-noob threads, but I'm just trying to contain this community. And by no means is this jusry biased. They were chosen randomly and it's a coincidence that they're all DTPA members.



Oh yeah, and I'm not dead.

[Allos]

Damn.

[Ketchup345]

I also move that we see Allos's will (that was his last message) http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_cry.gif. I vote we also try Shattered_Weasel for Murder and Attemped Murder.

[Allos]

I'm not dead you fucking moron!

[Bradicus]

he did it in defence, and he is a young offender.

As for you allos, if you can provide proof of you posting outside of FK in the last month, Ketchup will be guilty of perjury.

[Allos]

Go to the forum search and check.

[SpikeOtacon]

Due to circumstances beyond the courts control (Allos is watching saving private ryan)
we must postpone all trial until tomorrow. All rise as the judge leaves.

[Bradicus]

booya!
oh btw, http://www.pso-world.com/viewtopic.php?mode=viewtopic&topic=69822&forum=9&start=30
i'll speak to you later 'chup!

[Ketchup345]

On 2003-11-22 18:22, Bradicus wrote:
he did it in defence, and he is a young offender.

As for you allos, if you can provide proof of you posting outside of FK in the last month, Ketchup will be guilty of perjury.


Ok, I'll admit he has. Sorry, my fault; I'll change that. He has, but pretty much lives in Fresh Kills.

I plead guilty, and that gets me up to 5 years. That will be a separate trial. After the Allos Terrorism, and Shattered_Weasel's muder and attempted murder. I also request an unbiased jury, one who has no members of the DTPA, or that are currently part of the court now.

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Ketchup345 on 2003-11-22 18:40 ]</font>

[Bradicus]

a sad truth for most of us http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_cry.gif
*strikes Ketchup's comment from the record*

[Kizaragu]

Am I late? Did I miss the Trial!?

[SpikeOtacon]

No kiz, we are continuing this morning.

Ahem, The court of FKs is now in session. All rise for the honorable judge Bradicus.

[Allos]

*Yawns* Hey, I've been shot!

*Falls over dead* http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/coffin.gif oh well, let's get on with this. http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/coffin.gif

[Ketchup345]

On 2003-11-23 05:52, Allos wrote:
*Yawns* Hey, I've been shot!

*Falls over dead* http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/coffin.gif oh well, let's get on with this. http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/coffin.gif


Allos is dead now; even he admitteded it. Joy, no trial for foot raping. Oh well. How bout a funeral first?

Next trial: The DTPA's trial for terrorism along with several other charges.

I am organizing that one. Once I find a suitible jury, I'll make a thread.

[Shattered_weasel]

*shoots self*
*revives*
damn scape dolls

[Allos]

http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/coffin.gif This trial can continue. I'm just currently in the ghost state. One reason that Bradicus was recruited for the DTPA was that he can resurrect people. It's only a matter of time Ketchup. http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/coffin.gif

[Bradicus]

Alrighty, lets see if i cant work my mojo.

*dance of life*

That should do it.

[Allos]

Ahh, that's better. Bring it on Ketchy boy.

[SpikeOtacon]

Seeing as the procecution is out, the defence may continue.
**points towards kiz and allos**

[Kizaragu]

It was all Allos. He made me do it. I'm innocent! Innocent I tells ya! Honest Guv'!



<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Kizaragu on 2003-11-23 13:15 ]</font>

[Allos]

You're my attorney! What did you do???? I'm the one on trial here!

[Kizaragu]

What I meant to say is:


On 2003-11-23 13:14, Kizaragu My client Allos wrote:
It was all Allos Ketchup. He made me do it. I'm innocent! Innocent I tells ya! Honest Guv' Dude!

[Ketchup345]

On 2003-11-23 13:14, Kizaragu wrote:
It was all Allos. He made me do it. I'm innocent! Innocent I tells ya! Honest Guv'!


Ok, so Allos didn't do it, but he was a conspirator. Ok, Kiz admits he did it, but Allos played a part. If this was a real jury, I wouldn't have to say much more. But since its not, I'd like to close with this note:

If you vote Allos Guilty, you will ALL gain a rank in the DTPA.

[Kizaragu]

I retracted that statement. I made a mistake. Check my previouse post.

[Allos]

On 2003-11-23 13:42, Ketchup345 wrote:

Ok, so Allos didn't do it, but he was a conspirator. Ok, Kiz admits he did it, but Allos played a part. If this was a real jury, I wouldn't have to say much more. But since its not, I'd like to close with this note:

If you vote Allos Guilty, you will ALL gain a rank in the DTPA.




First of all, you get five years for perjury, but that aside....



If you vote Allos guilty, there will be no DTPA. Guntz has strict orders to ban and kill all of the members if this happens. I trust that none of you will vote against me, but I had to do this. Guntz was my first member anyway.

[SpikeOtacon]

**clears throat**
well, jury. You've heard both sides of the case. Take a moment to evaluate.
**sits in the jury box, thinking**

[Ketchup345]

On 2003-11-23 13:45, Kizaragu wrote:
I retracted that statement. I made a mistake. Check my previouse post.


The first one is still there, and it was first, and said Allos made you do it.

Also, that's 5 years max, which is normally only when someone pleads innocent and found guilty. I pleaded guilty already.

Plus, don't forget, there's the FK v. DTPA trial next; so either way you are going to probably die, or go to jail. I would choose die myself.

[Bradicus]

teehee! Either way, i have diplomatic immunity.

[Allos]

I've died twice in the past (recently and in the Super Smash FK Melee, long story), both times I've been brought back. And the entire DTPA has faced jail before! Just ask Bradicus of last years festivities at Christmas and the police are sure to be mentioned sometime.

[Bradicus]

This time, we have the party, the drinking competition, and the weapons test at different times K?

[Allos]

Agreed Brad. Oh, and I almost forgot to mention that the Smiths (the Smiths live next door to our hideout spammers) want us all over for Thanksgiving. Something about returning the favor of Mr. Smith's missing legs was mentioned.

[Bradicus]

Count me in... sweet, three thanksgiving dinners in one year

[Ketchup345]

On 2003-11-23 15:18, Allos wrote:
And the entire DTPA has faced jail before! Just ask Bradicus of last years festivities at Christmas and the police are sure to be mentioned sometime.


You've face jail, but never for charges of terrorism, murder, and putting thousands of poor Chinese children out of their job.




On 2003-11-23 15:15, Bradicus wrote:
teehee! Either way, i have diplomatic immunity.


Actually, not for this trial, as a result of the terrorism charges. The Taliban didn't have diplomatic immunity for them supporting terrorism, you won't get it for your role in supporting and carrying it out.

[Bradicus]

Goof!
Being a foreign politician, as well as royalty, i get diplomatic immunity.

http://members.chello.nl/~h.vaningen/goof.gif

[Ketchup345]

On 2003-11-23 15:35, Bradicus wrote:
Goof!
Being a foreign politician, as well as royalty, i get diplomatic immunity.


As I said before, that doesn't applie to when there is terrorism charges involved. The Taliban doesn't/didn't get diplomatic immunity because they supported terrorism. You won't get immunity because you fund it, support it, and participate in it. The Taliban was politicains in Afghanistan, and I'm sure the old royalty wn't get it.

[Shattered_weasel]

*ties random H-bomb to himself then runs into the courtroom exploding. Then raises from the dead*

Darn scape dolls