Mixfortune
Dec 4, 2003, 07:14 PM
Thursday, December 4th.
Riots have broken out near the ADTPA headquarters earlier today, where various pants of all shapes and sizes have come together to protest.
"I can't believe this!" one pair of trousers exclaimed. "I trusted them for so long, and then they do something like this!"
The ADTPA, the Anti Death To Pants Association, is a coalition formed to combat the DTPA, Death To Pants Association. The DTPA has been notorious as of late, mainly for the advocation and pre-emptive action of the ritual burning of pants. The ADTPA was formed as a tactical response of outrage towards the DTPA's actions and beliefs, and stands to protect the rights of pants everywhere.
Wednesday night, December 3rd, at a fancy restaurant downtown, a paying costumer was dining happily, when a glob of ketchup dripped off of his hamburger and onto the leg of his pants.
"The stain just won't come out!" said the customer when asked to speak with us. "The ketchup ruined my pants forever! I had to throw them away!"
The outrage quickly spread throughout the world of pants, and various protest groups had been formed out of the ensuing chaos. The leader of the riots could not be reached for comment, but various members of the protests claim they will do whatever it takes to make sure the ADTPA leader, known by many only as "Ketchup", is exiled from the country.
When reached for comment, DTPA leader Allos proclaimed that "they had this coming for quite a while, now. I'm surprised it didn't happen earlier than it did. I see this as a step forward for the prosperity of the DTPA as a whole."
The ADTPA refused to comment.
As always, we will keep you updated on the situation as new information becomes available.
Riots have broken out near the ADTPA headquarters earlier today, where various pants of all shapes and sizes have come together to protest.
"I can't believe this!" one pair of trousers exclaimed. "I trusted them for so long, and then they do something like this!"
The ADTPA, the Anti Death To Pants Association, is a coalition formed to combat the DTPA, Death To Pants Association. The DTPA has been notorious as of late, mainly for the advocation and pre-emptive action of the ritual burning of pants. The ADTPA was formed as a tactical response of outrage towards the DTPA's actions and beliefs, and stands to protect the rights of pants everywhere.
Wednesday night, December 3rd, at a fancy restaurant downtown, a paying costumer was dining happily, when a glob of ketchup dripped off of his hamburger and onto the leg of his pants.
"The stain just won't come out!" said the customer when asked to speak with us. "The ketchup ruined my pants forever! I had to throw them away!"
The outrage quickly spread throughout the world of pants, and various protest groups had been formed out of the ensuing chaos. The leader of the riots could not be reached for comment, but various members of the protests claim they will do whatever it takes to make sure the ADTPA leader, known by many only as "Ketchup", is exiled from the country.
When reached for comment, DTPA leader Allos proclaimed that "they had this coming for quite a while, now. I'm surprised it didn't happen earlier than it did. I see this as a step forward for the prosperity of the DTPA as a whole."
The ADTPA refused to comment.
As always, we will keep you updated on the situation as new information becomes available.