Wheee!

[navci]

I am done angry and sad for now.

Yay.
My mom made a deicision for me, that I am heading back in the beginning of September no matter what.

Yippie!
Woohoo.

Not.
Thought you'd all like to know.

[Sef]

I'm just a little confused on this. Could you be a little more descriptive, navi?

Sorry, I just don't get it. http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_disapprove.gif

[ABDUR101]

Back home I'd assume?

[Sef]

On 2004-08-20 22:43, ABDUR101 wrote:
Back home I'd assume?


That was what I had guessed. I suppose that's one place that could result in an reaction like the one navi gave.

[Mixfortune]

Yeah, it's about heading back home.
There would be possible plusses, but the disadvantages seem to completely dilute and disintegrate them.

This is a very unfortunate turn of events and I wish the best for you. It may seem completely over, but since I do not know your parents personally I can only imagine... do your best to overcome what anything they may say about you that isn't true. If you stay strong you can overcome this. Look to a positive future, and if you are unable to return to PSOW, remember us as we will you.

I'm probably sounding incredibly cheesy right now... -_-

[EJ]

Hopefully you can get through this Navi. I wish you luck.

[BogusKun]

If you don't come back Navi remember I still love you...

...if not that I have a crush on ya http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_wink.gif

[navci]

Well I havn't exactly elaborated on the situation, I was a little too upset to do it at the time.

Anyway. So you all know the story, I havn't been able to find a job blah blah blah. Mom wants me to go home cuz she can find me jobs blah blah blah. She finally made a deadline that I am to go home by the beginning of September (which is like in a little more than a week) no matter what. Because any job I can possibly get here will prolly be crap job and I will have no future. And stuff.

In a way, I agree with her and think going back maybe a good idea for career. But, I know full well that she being the control freak she is, she will destroy me as a person completely. See, she gives me phone calls, and everytime she is calling, I feel sick to the stomach. The kinda things she says to me leaves me depressed all night. Let's not forget this is the person that knocks me over everytime I'd like to try to stand back up. ... There are more, but they are not important.

The important thing is I am not going to head back. I am going to keep trying to do what I am doing. Afterall, if I have some crap money, even if it is crap, there is nothing she can really do to me, right? A friend of mine is moving into the city on September first, I will talk to her and see if I can just stay with her for a little while when I sort this out. If she can't reach me, there is nothing she can do.. I hope? The deal is, I still need to keep looking. ... This time I am willing to relocate outside of the country if I need to. There is the problem of working visas and citizenship issues, but well, compare to totaly mental destruction I think I can deal with those.

.... I realize this is no longer a rant, really. But, well, I have come to know that there are some people who do care about me around here, thought they should at least know what is going to happen.

[astuarlen]

*lots of hugs for navi*
I can't say I understand your predicament, but I have experienced the intense frustration of living with (and not living with) a complete control-freak. For me, the day said person left was the day my life became 99% less stressful and more fulfilling. I don't feel qualified to give advice, but I will give you my encouragement. I believe you're doing what you must to survive as your own person, and I believe you can get through. From what I've seen and experienced, the first step--getting away from the controlling influence--is the most important and sometimes the hardest. You have my respect and encouragement and my hope that you will succeed. http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_smile.gif And read Mix's reply again, because it's so good, and I think he's right. http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_smile.gif

[Outrider]

Navi, keep your chin up. I hope everything works out well, and if not, we can lead a team of specialists to infiltrate your home and get you out when it gets bad. http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_wacko.gif

But seriously, try not to let it all get to you. I hope you'll be able to stick around on PSOW cause I don't know what things would be like without you.

Here's hoping you strike it rich in Canada and don't have to leave?

[Sord]

Well, considering the fact that she is over in Hong Kong, and you are in the Canada, and above the legal age, there is technically nothing what so ever she can do to force you "back home" as your home is where you choose.

The only way she could force you, would be to cut off any money supply towards you, if she even gives you money, and anything else she gives you supplies of, if she does that.

But no, she can not force you you to come back. There is no way she can get the police after you, regardless if Canada police would be willing to cooperate with Hong Kong police, because you have not done anything wrong or violated any law.

[Mixfortune]

Personally I would have thought the cut off of support would have been the major risk of not returning, but it seems as if there's a bit more to it than that.

While true that they cannot forcibly cause navi(nator) to return, there are other matters at work that are on a more personal level. It's unfortunate that there is that secondary matter, and I hope that it is able to clear itself in time.

[navci]

On 2004-08-21 14:34, Mixfortune wrote:
While true that they cannot forcibly cause navi(nator) to return, there are other matters at work that are on a more personal level. It's unfortunate that there is that secondary matter, and I hope that it is able to clear itself in time.


It is true that there isn't anything she csn do, physically, aside from cutting support. But she can always mentally break me as long as she can contact me. As mentioned above, she is my mother, she has a lot of influence on me. I will fight it anyway. Nothing has changed, but if I make a decision and work on it, I suppose there is something I can do.

[ABDUR101]

Eventually, you'll either stop feeding into the drama and live as you choose, or you'll just be subservient to your mother and how she see's you.

Your choice, but overall, look at your mother's point of view or whatever, and see if it coincides with how you want to go about things.

I don't know anything about you or your mother, other than she seems to bring you down.

Like I said, learn to cut her off and ignore her, and if needed, change your damn number. She used to support you with money I guess, and if you were supporting yourself money-wise, I'd say just tell her how you feel, let it out and get down to the nitty-gritty with her, and tell her if she can't talk to you as an adult with a brain, then to not contact you, and if she can't desist, just change your damn number and be done with it.

But, you don't have a job, and she's made the deadline. I'm sure she's looking out for your best interests, but if you aren't accepting what she's offering, then you have to deal with things on your own.

Also, if you want to continue to have a good relation with your mother, I'd suggest telling her all-out how she makes you feel. You can't suppress it and all that bullshit forever, whats the use? It's stupid to not say anything(or to say something and not have it sink in) only to have her keep knocking you down and feeling like shit.

I love my family, but there are family members I just tell to their face what I think of what they say or do, I could care less because most often I don't care if I talk to them or not.(Sister's, neice, nephews, cousins, etc)

Your choice, but whatever you're doing, gotta get in gear and make the decision. How you live, the relationship with your mother, etc, all in your hands and how you want it to play out.

[Bradicus]

Though I can't express my advice as well as Abdur, I will say this: Never let your mother make you feel like anything less than an independent human being.

I hope all works out for you, and even if worst comes to worst, everyone here will always be behind you in spirit. We know you as a funny and talented person. Most importantly, folks around here respect you.

Best of luck. You can do it.



<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Bradicus on 2004-08-21 15:23 ]</font>