Do yourself a favor.

[Sayara]

I say this to everyone. Do not let yourself be taken through with an online relationship. Unless you have direct plans to visit right away. In most occassions the results are deadly.

And i mean that.

Not sure if this is much of a rant, if it isnt could someone dump me in the trash then?

[Scrub]

I was in an online relationship, and it ended with much tears and chaos like any would. I felt the worst pain I've ever felt.

Would I do it again? To feel so great to talk to somebody whom I adore so much? I'd do anything for that.

There is also more on my matter which I'm not at liberty to publicly discuss.

[EphekZ]

I had one......Didn't like it....Boring....



Does this sudden upbringing of this subject have to do with ToH and Eanae?

[Sayara]

No. Me.

[EphekZ]

Ah, well sorry to hear that

[_Sinue_]

I've had a few online relationships. Too many, I think.. which is weird since I never have gone online to "look" for someone to have a relationship with. It just sort of happens. *Shrug* It got to the point that eventually in FFXI and PSO, I would get pissy at people for even mentioning what gender they were. Who cares? You're a screen name and a bunch of pixels. Just do your job in the party, and leave it at that.

Not that bad experiences in the past have turned me away from dating online.. but for right now, I want something tangable. Most "online relationships" to me, turn out to be just that. Online.. and I don't want any part of any relationship where I feel it's not 100% being given by both people.

[Daikarin]

On 2004-12-11 08:13, Tingle wrote:
Not sure if this is much of a rant, if it isnt could someone dump me in the trash then?


It is what we call, an "indirect rant". In this case, you were dumped. http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_wacko.gif

Don't worry, there's plenty of fish in the sea.

Just don't go fishing on the internet, it doesn't work.

[Ness]

Online relationships?

Been there, done that, and never going back.



<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Ness on 2004-12-12 11:03 ]</font>

[Mystil]

Yes I've been in one, and..it's crushed me for quite a long time. I should have never met this person, for everything that had to do with me online, changed for the worst. And there's no way I can reverse it. Don't listen to me if you don't wont to, but I implore you all dont never get into online relationships. YOU are going to be the only one faithful...and.. things will just hit the fan..

[Aredhel]

The lack of sexual contact gets to people. Deny it if you want to, but urges are urges.

If you would avoid this sort of thing just because the odds of you spending the rest of your life with them are low, then you might as well avoid all relationships completely - pretty much all of them end in tears and regret.

[SpikeOtacon]

On 2004-12-12 16:37, Aredhel wrote:
The lack of sexual contact gets to people. Deny it if you want to, but urges are urges.

If you would avoid this sort of thing just because the odds of you spending the rest of your life with them are low, then you might as well avoid all relationships completely - pretty much all of them end in tears and regret.



This is quoted for emphasis, and has been approved by SpikeOtacon.

Everyone knows I have a history with relationships, and them all failing miserably. Some my fault, others not. But I must say, Online relationships are some of the hardest to maintain. Even if you know the person in real life, the lack of contact and whatnot will get to you. And you will begin to doubt. And then tears will ensue.

[Scrub]

Not always it's that you'll start to doubt, but that you'll trust too much and the trust will be exploited.

THEN there's the tears.=P

[space_butler]

ive never had one, and dont intend to..the only guy I know who is in one seems happy enough though, so they cant all be bad.

[Sagasu]

ha. haha. hahaha.

You can't posses a person over the internet.

You can't really put a leash on one another.

So naturally, possesive feelings aren't really all that strong, lasting. Blah.

[Aredhel]

On 2004-12-13 08:33, Sagasu wrote:
ha. haha. hahaha.

You can't posses a person over the internet.

You can't really put a leash on one another.

So naturally, possesive feelings aren't really all that strong, lasting. Blah.



=)

So glad somebody else understands.

The fuel for most shitty relationships (read: most relationships) comes from peoples' misgivings about the "love they share". In all actuality, the only thing that keeps the relationship going is the fight for control - whether this is manipulated through sex, money, lies, or a combination therof is up to the individual chocies each paticipant makes. You don't get to control those easy variables over the internet - all that's there is two people who are forced to deal with one another even more directly than many do in the real-world. A lot of people don't like that sort of blatant honesty - it forces them to deal with themselves and with others in a way that social engineering hasn't taught them to do so in the past.

[Sagasu]

Eh, its usually either that, or the extreme lack of trust.

Based upon my own personal reflections, love is the ultimate trust. In the stages of general interest to another person, and they return that interest, their is more of an exchange of assurance of loyalty, compassion, etc. I find that the doubt never ceases in most relationships, and breeds other unpleasant situations.

As for the power struggle, its based entirely on who were talking about. Myself, I prefer those who are capable of asking for what they really want. It allows me to get a basic grip of the situation quickly. Others are different, everyone is different. So I have doubts what we say here is applied to anyone, much less the greater majority.

Nobody likes to be judged, much less the judge. Especially when their being compared to other people, then things are uncomfortably competitive and personal. Meh,

ping

[Sayara]

In a nutshell, I was foolish to think it would of worked and i felt the ultimate price. I'll get over it soon enough.

Thanks for the replies folks.

[IamBob]

*sigh* ive never really brought this up to many people... but i have never been in a relationship with...well...anyone...

and i kinda feel left out, you know, missing the "action" of a teenagers life. makes me feel bad that right now im just sitting here at my computer when i could be out with friends and having a good time... but im not. and sometimes i get really down and lonely because i have no one here beside me. i dont ever get depressed because i know someday, ill find someone...but i dont want it to be a short, meaninless relation... i want someone who will stay with me for as long as possible...and i want them to be true, and respect me for who i am and what i do, not for looks or popularity (which i dont have much anyway). i want someone with the right things for me, and i want to have the right things for her.

like i said...i never really told anyone these feelings, and in fact ive lied to a few people about going out...which i now see is bad and wrong. i hope i did not waste too much of your time for reading this.



<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: IamBob on 2004-12-13 13:32 ]</font>

[Aredhel]

On 2004-12-13 10:55, Sagasu wrote:

Based upon my own personal reflections, love is the ultimate trust. In the stages of general interest to another person, and they return that interest, their is more of an exchange of assurance of loyalty, compassion, etc. I find that the doubt never ceases in most relationships, and breeds other unpleasant situations.



Exactly. Most relationships are just doomed from the start as neither person (or just one person) is willing to put absolute trust within another. That is why "love" is so often mistaken - people fail to realize that it's truly an ideal rooted in absolute understanding, forgiveness, trust, and compromise. As such, I believe that it's common for love to be found in many of the most unlikely of circumstances; outisde of the boundaries of the common mating rituals for human beings (i.e. dating, parties, etc...). It blossoms the most when both people have so much love for themselves that they are willing to share it with another. The feeling never goes away, even though the relationship may be forfeit, love remains a residue on our souls. But it's so much more than this as well - ideals can only bring the human spirit so far. That is why one should not seek love - it's just not meant for everyone, despite each individual's capacity for it.

But getting over this one is a good thing, Tingle. =D

[ABDUR101]

On 2004-12-13 13:31, IamBob wrote:
*sigh* ive never really brought this up to many people... but i have never been in a relationship with...well...anyone...


Me neither and I'm 21. I'm not in any rush, prolly never will be. If it happens, it happens, guess it'll just be all that much greater when it does, and if it doesn't, oh well.

Although after realising the mentallity and attitudes of my brother's last two girlfriends, one of which was 27 and the current 22, I'm definately not in any hurry, if not worried of getting with someone akin to them.

I'll take being alone over the company of someone like them any time.

[AUTO_]

Internet relationships have always been a mystery to me why people even bother.

I have an old friend from PSO, who I still talk to, whose been in an internet relationship for just over three years now, and I can't even begin to imagine how much it's going to crush him if it doesn't work out.

It just doesn't seem right to me that you could get so involved with someone you've never met only to have them completely fuck with your psyche.

No thanks.



<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: AUTO_ on 2004-12-13 17:28 ]</font>

[lain2k3]

I never understood how the hell an online relationship could work in the first place.

It's definetely one of the worse ideas people have had.

[Sef]

On 2004-12-13 13:31, IamBob wrote:
*sigh* ive never really brought this up to many people... but i have never been in a relationship with...well...anyone...

Everything he said in that post described me perfectly. Right down to every little bit of it.

I've had a couple instances where I started to develop feelings for some of the people that I talk to over the internet, but after seeing some of the outcomes I just turned it all off. Almost everyone that I talk to now has the same respect and concern from me.

I will heed your warning, Tingle. =] And I hope that if you have not already gotten over it, that you will soon be your merry self again.

[undevil]

I always thought the cyber sex part was weird. Chances are you are talking to another dude.