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Allos
Apr 23, 2006, 04:20 PM
________

zwandude15
Apr 23, 2006, 04:32 PM
It does suck to be just that "extra" friend of hers who she can come to.

As much as I'd like to talk about this, I couldn't possibly say it all in a post without your responses.

Maybe in a Instant Message or something, PM, whatever it may be, but there's a lot of potential things you may be missing.

Don't worry, at least you know now that 1 person can relate...

Although I can't say I do now, seeing as how I'm a tiny bit taken.

x]

ABDUR101
Apr 23, 2006, 04:54 PM
If she's only going to use you as her little pity-pal when she needs cheering up, stay away from her or you'll continue to feel used and neglected.

darthsaber9x9
Apr 23, 2006, 05:48 PM
Slit the bitches throat and lob her corpse into a canal....
















is what you should do if you want a hard ass-raping in the slammer.


Sensible advice: Listen to ABDUR101

Saraphim
Apr 23, 2006, 06:02 PM
On 2006-04-23 14:54, ABDUR101 wrote:
If she's only going to use you as her little pity-pal when she needs cheering up, stay away from her or you'll continue to feel used and neglected.



True, she will string you along, with no concern as to you or your feelings.

Daikarin
Apr 23, 2006, 06:32 PM
I don't remember any of your past "episodes" but it seems to me you're more of a friend to her. And if you don't have the impression, it at least seems she enjoys riding your emotions like a rollercoaster. Do you consider it to be enough dialogue and honesty in your relationship? If things go back and forth all the time it must mean something's not right - It's either the way she sees you or you see her, or something else.

If it were me, I'd dump her. Still friends, sure - but I'm not into a relationship with a woman to let her play her game all the time. It's not about being on control, it's about not being controlled.

DevinTre
Apr 23, 2006, 07:43 PM
My guess is that if you were to start seeing someone, she would come right back, screwing up your plans and trying to show the "new girl" that she has no business being in the picture.
Sure, she's off doing her own thing now, but if she even gets a whiff of you moving on, especially seriously ... that will be the most likely be the scenario.

As Daikarin said, it 's about being uncontrolled. There's caring about someone, and there are control issues. It's up to you to decide to fully move on or keep it in mind that she'll come back and let someone else get hurt. I know that's not the issue at hand (YET), but if you tell yourself it's time to move on but your heart isn't really in it ... things could get messy. It's not easy to get someone out of your system, no matter how much they've hurt you and/or let you down. =/

Daikarin
Apr 23, 2006, 08:07 PM
I would like to add a thing or two, and I would appreciate it if you read it.

If you let her have your way with you, if you ever get the slightest idea that you're only a shoulder to be cried on, then finish it off immediatly - For your own sake. Do not let her take you for granted nor use you as a happyness tool or jealousy-testing-dummy.

A relationship like that, when one "lover" takes the other for granted, (in your case, since you "screwed up", and she apologised) always ends up with you being used and abused as being what she/he always saw in you: A safe-keeping. Probably a temporary safe-keeping until she decides to find someone else. Question is, do you feel she treats you like a "safe-keeping boyfriend"?

If you do, finish off immediatly. It's not healthy for you to be honest in wanting to start something and letting her twist your notion of relationship the way she wants to, due to the fact that she's aware that you owe her. If you two have different notions of what your relationship should be, talk it out. If you don't reach a common sense, let each other follow their way.

I don't know the girl, so I can't say she's taking back at whatever you did - That's up to you to judge, based on her character. But if she is, if you feel you are this "fallout boy" you claimed, then for your sake, get a load of self-respect and don't let yourself be a love dummy.

Don't trade your pride over a crush on someone - A relationship in which that happens has you setting your sights on the sweetest of joy, but only reaching camel manure instead.

"Mais vale estar so do que mal acompanhado."



<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Daikarin on 2006-04-23 18:25 ]</font>

REJ-
Apr 23, 2006, 08:15 PM
Leave her. At this point, your just setting yourself up to be used, like an emotional tampon that she can string along and when she's in a mood swing, she'll have hold over someone who she can throw up her emotions on. She'll make it seem like there's hope for a relationship to go on, and say things that seem like it can happen, but then go on some other direction. Basically, don't listen to anything she says, let her actions speak for her instead of her words, cause there's a huge difference between what a girl SAYS, THINKS, WANTS, and DOES. I can't offer much advice other than this, so I hope it'll do.

Allos
Apr 24, 2006, 02:47 PM
_________

Orange_Coconut
Apr 24, 2006, 03:25 PM
It's always hard to abandon hope because it's the hope that makes you want to hang on.

There seems to be a lot on your mind about her, but I've noticed that it's all in rants. I don't know how long you've known her, but there are people who change... But there are also people who have been the same, when it's really you who have been blinded all along by hanging on to a good moment or good attributes, trying to outweigh the bad.

It's rather cold-hearted to even mention another guy like that around someone whom she knows has feelings about her. No contact for a week means that she thinks far less of you than you do of her, of course. Plus, when you said you got a hold of her do you mean she didn't even try to call you back after the several times you called her? And that you just happened to catch her with another phone call? Well, if so, then I really don't think she should be on your mind as much as she is.

If she's a good friend, then that's one thing. But it sounds like there's not much of a chance to get together with her now. Also, it sounds like you're one of the last things on her mind as well. I'm not trying to be rude/mean, I'm just saying what I think this situation sounds like. If you were to go up to her and tell her how you feel about how she's been treating you, then tell her not to bother to call you again, would she be very sad? Think about it, think about how you could see her reacting and then think about what you two have together now, and see if everything you've been through is really even worth it.

Maridia
Apr 24, 2006, 04:17 PM
Allos, could you tell me if this is the girl that has basically been the topic of every rant I've ever seen you make? The one who kept getting with that guy who didn't care about her, etc. If this is that SAME girl from ALL those rants, you have got to get a clue, man. You can't be anything more to her. I imagine when she decided that sex thing, she was simply horny, lonely, and you happened to be there at the time. That doesn't mean she doesn't care about you at all, it simply means that she thought she wanted it but then realized she really didn't want it with you. I don't think it's anything you fucked up with, but she might be letting you believe it's something you did. Seems her mind has been made up for awhile now. You didn't do anything, she simply decided not to go through with it and then when you showed disappointment, she did your typical girly overreact thing to cover it and make you feel bad. Girls are devious. Even if they don't realize they're doing the things they do.

You will probably never be anything more than a friend to her. She probably likes a certain type of guy. If this is the same girl as before, she obviously likes more "bad" guys. And you're just beating yourself up over this for nothing. You may think she's perfect or the only one for you, or that you love her more than anything else, but you know what? You'll love again. And it ain't gonna happen with this girl. I want to be comforting and hug you and tell you a lot of other things but the cold hard truth is what you really need to hear, and I hope you actually take it to heart. This girl only goes to you when she's feeling lonely or neglected. That cannot be the basis for any relationship. She is your friend, and you have to keep her at that and move on.

If you can't seperate your feelings for her from your friendship, you may need to stop seeing her. I know that's easier said than done but you must find a way to deal with this. You are so blinded by your feelings for her that you really aren't seeing the real picture here. I don't even think SHE realizes how strongly you feel, which is why she doesn't think twice about talking about other guys. Or maybe she's just really that braindead. Or maybe she realizes your feelings and is trying to subtley give you hints. No matter what it is, she won't change. You have to be the one to walk away from this before you do anymore damage to yourself. I hate watching you beat yourself up over this girl who obviously could care less about your true feelings, and frankly, if she isn't the one to seek YOU out, why bother? She obviously is far too blind to see what a good guy she has in front of her.

There's a time to persevere, and there's a time to be smart and move on. This has gone on long enough, Allos. And I think deep inside you know it's all true. This is one of those cases where willpower and self discipline will come into play. You have to do the right thing for YOU. Hell, if I was you, it would have been over at the kick in the nuts. http://www.pso-world.com/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_razz.gif All this shit she's been putting you through and THEN to sack you? No thanks. Bitch can go find herself another emotional and physical punching bag.

Good luck. I really mean it. Getting over someone can be hard, but sometimes it's a cold reality. I'll be behind you all the way.



<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Maridia on 2006-04-24 14:20 ]</font>

DevinTre
Apr 24, 2006, 04:26 PM
I think Maridia hit every applicable point perfectly.

Skorpius
Apr 24, 2006, 04:33 PM
She's a stupid whore. Move on.

sprky585
Apr 24, 2006, 05:44 PM
i kinda had the same problem, with my best friend that was a girl and that i was goin to ask her out like in a week or so but then another guy did and she said yeah and i kept tellin her that he was gonna crush her heart, but she didnt listen, and what happend, her heart got broken, so i asked her "why didnt u listen" and she said that i didnt tell her anything, we arent best friends anymore, just friends, but still, what a bitch

Allos
Apr 24, 2006, 06:30 PM
________

REJ-
Apr 24, 2006, 10:39 PM
I think you'll be able to handle it. It might take some time, but since you know how to deal with the situation, you'll be fine soon enough.

Maridia
Apr 24, 2006, 11:27 PM
You should focus your attention into the DTPA. I came along after all the cool stuff happened. http://www.pso-world.com/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_frown.gif