[Aurra]

If Your Child is a Gothic, Reform Through the Lord!

Listed below are some warning signs to indicate if your child may
have
gone astray from the Lord.

Gothic (or goth) is a very obscure and often dangerous culture that
young teenagers are prone to participating in. The gothic culture
leads
young, susceptible minds into an imagined world of evil, darkness,
and
violence. Please seek immediate attention through counselling,
prayer,
and parental guidance to rid your child of Satan's temptations if
five
or more of the following are applicable to your child:

-Frequently wears black clothing.

-Wears band and/or rock t-shirts.

-Wears excessive black eye makeup, lipstick or nailpolish.

-Wears any odd, silver jewelry or symbols. Some of these include:
reversed crosses, pentagrams, pentacles, ankhs or various other
Satanic
worshipping symbols.

-Shows an interest in piercings or tattoos.

-Listens to gothic or any other anti-social genres of music. (Marilyn
Manson claims to be the anti-Christ, and publicly speaks against the
Lord. Please discard any such albums IMMEDIATELY.)

-Associates with other people that dress, act or speak eccentrically.

-Shows a declining interest in wholesome activities, such as: the
Bible,
prayer, church or sports.

-Shows an increasing interest in death, vampires, magic, the occult,
witchcraft or anything else that involves Satan.

-Takes drugs.

-Drinks alcohol.

-Is suicidal and/or depressed.

-Cuts, burns or partakes in any other method of self-mutilation.
(This
is a Satanic ritual that uses pain to detract from the light of God
and
His love. Please seek immediate attention for this at your local
mental
health center.)

-Complains of boredom.

-Sleeps too excessively or too little.

-Is excessively awake during the night.

-Dislikes sunlight or any other form of light. (This pertains to
vampires promoting the idea that His light is of no use.)

-Demands an unusual amount of privacy.

-Spends large amounts of time alone.

-Requests time alone and quietness. (This is so that your chid may
speak
to evil sprits through meditation.)

-Insists on spending time with friends while unaccompanied by an
adult.

-Disregards authority figures; teachers, priests, nuns and elders are
but a few examples of this.

-Misbehaves at school.

-Misbehaves at home.

-Eats excessively or too little.

-Eats goth-related foods. Count Dracula cereal is an example of this.

-Drinks blood or expresses an interest in drinking blood. (Vampires
believe this is how to attain Satan. This act is very dangerous and
should be stopped immediately.)

-Watches cable television or any other corrupted media sources. (Ask
your local church for proper programs that your child may watch.)

-Plays videos games that contains violence or role-playing nature.

-Uses the internet excessively and frequently makes time for the
computer.

-Makes Satanic symbols and/or violently shakes head to music.

-Dances to music in a provocative or sexual manner.

-Expresses an interest in sex.

-Masturbates

-Is homosexual and/or bisexual.

-Pursues dangerous cult religions. Such include: Satanism,
Scientology,
Philosophy, Paganism, Wicca, Hinduism and Buddhism.

-Wears pins, stickers or anything else that contains these various
phrases: 'I'm so gothic,' I'm dead,' 'woe is me,' 'I'm a goth.'

-Claims to be a goth.

If five or more of these apply to your child, please intervene
immediately. The gothic culture is dangerous and Satan thrives within
it. If any of these problems persist, enlist your child into your
local
mental health center.

*looks down and sees a Reebok shirt that happens to be black*
*notes the day-old bowl of "Count Dracula" cereal (could've sworn the box actually read "Count Chocula," but oh well) on the computer desk*
*Remembers that time he misbehaved at school*
*Watched cable TV last night*
*Is currently suffering of boredom*

Oh no! I've got five or more Satanist warning signs! I'm a goth! Evil spirit, begone!!! Well, looks like instead of driving to Salem today to purchase some dangerous rock albums by the Antichrist, misbehave, drink whiskey, associate with people who speak eccentrically, use computers, and dance to music in a provocative manner, I'd better drive to my local mental health center to be cured of my Satanist tendancies by leeches or electro shock therapy. Damnit. See you guys in a few weeks.

[Aredhel]

-Expresses an interest in sex.

ROFLMAO!

Damn those Goths and their inherently human reproductive urges!!! It's a sad state of affairs when people want to have sex instead of worsip the lord

Lessee, I wear black clothing sometimes, I wear rock T-shirts (I just LOVE Tool-inspired artwork), I have almost every Manson CD, I spend almost an hour on the computer each day (*gasp*), I sleep a lot, I meditate (though, I don't try to communicate with 'spirits'), I drink Green Tea, and I could go on...

Though, I just don't consider myself a 'goth' for some reason. XP

Where did you get this?

[Solstis]

On 2004-07-25 12:05, Aurra wrote:
If Your Child is a Gothic, Reform Through the Lord!

-Associates with other people that dress, act or speak eccentrically.

-Shows a declining interest in wholesome activities, such as: the
Bible,
prayer, church or sports.

-Complains of boredom.

-Sleeps too excessively or too little.

-Is excessively awake during the night.

-Demands an unusual amount of privacy.

-Spends large amounts of time alone.

-Requests time alone and quietness. (This is so that your chid may
speak
to evil sprits through meditation.)

-Eats excessively or too little.

-Watches cable television or any other corrupted media sources. (Ask
your local church for proper programs that your child may watch.)

-Plays videos games that contains violence or role-playing nature.

-Uses the internet excessively and frequently makes time for the
computer.

-Expresses an interest in sex.

-Masturbates (*darting eyes*)

-Is homosexual and/or bisexual.

If five or more of these apply to your child, please intervene
immediately. The gothic culture is dangerous and Satan thrives within
it. If any of these problems persist, enlist your child into your
local
mental health center.

Uh-oh! Time to be brainwashed! That's a wee bit more than five.

You forgot to add: Refuses to watch Fox, making him/her un-patriotic as well!





<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Solstis on 2004-07-25 12:14 ]</font>

[Aurra]

Some guy posted it at another message board, and I thought it was great.

*Looks down at sig*

OH NO! A rock band has infested my sig!!!

Damnit. I am so going to hell.

[KaFKa]

this is funny. where did you find that?

personally, i fit almost all of those criterium, but hey, thats why i claim to be goth =D

seriously though... that is the funniest thing i've seen all day.

[ABDUR101]

95% of those apply to me, I am close to Satan status!

[Solstis]

On 2004-07-25 12:22, ABDUR101 wrote:
95% of those apply to me, I am close to Satan status!

No, I doubt even Satan is that evil.

*makes a cross sign with his fingers*

Back with thee!

[Aurra]

REPENT, ABDUR, REPENT!

Put down those dangerous Tori Amos albums! Spit in the third eye of those obscure Eastern religions, like "Buddhism"! AND FOR GOD'S SAKE, DON'T YOU DARE EAT ANY MORE COUNT CHOCULA!!!

[astuarlen]

-Drinks blood or expresses an interest in drinking blood. (Vampires
believe this is how to attain Satan. This act is very dangerous and
should be stopped immediately.)

O noes! PSOW has been infected with a Goth smile. Witness the power of the cup-o-blood: Drink up, my vampire friends!

[Madzozs]

-Frequently wears black clothing.

-Wears band and/or rock t-shirts.

-Shows an interest in piercings or tattoos.

-Listens to gothic or any other anti-social genres of music. (Marilyn
Manson claims to be the anti-Christ, and publicly speaks against the
Lord. Please discard any such albums IMMEDIATELY.)

-Associates with other people that dress, act or speak eccentrically.

-Shows a declining interest in wholesome activities, such as: the
Bible,
prayer, church or sports.

-Shows an increasing interest in death, vampires, magic, the occult,
witchcraft or anything else that involves Satan.

-Drinks alcohol.

-Is suicidal and/or depressed.

-Complains of boredom.

-Sleeps too excessively or too little.

-Is excessively awake during the night.

-Dislikes sunlight or any other form of light.

-Demands an unusual amount of privacy.

-Spends large amounts of time alone.

-Requests time alone and quietness.

-Insists on spending time with friends while unaccompanied by an adult.

-Disregards authority figures

-Eats excessively or too little.

-Eats goth-related foods. Count Dracula cereal is an example of this.

-Watches cable television or any other corrupted media sources. (Ask
your local church for proper programs that your child may watch.)

-Plays videos games that contains violence or role-playing nature.

-Uses the internet excessively and frequently makes time for the computer.

-Makes Satanic symbols and/or violently shakes head to music.

-Expresses an interest in sex

I'm so evil, I'm 5 times the average goth without being goth.