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amtalx
Aug 20, 2008, 08:53 PM
So, I get off from work, excited to go pick up my copy of Too Human. Hop in my car, do the usual drive home. Traffic is incredibly light. I end up doing 75 and I'm still getting passed by those demons in the left lane.

Anyway, I roll into the store and tell 'Average GameStop Employee #2' that I have a reserve copy of Too Human to pick up. Amidst the process, he convinces me to reserve Gears of War 2 while I'm there since, let's face it, I'm going to get it. Turns out he's actually a pretty cool guy, and we end up talking for about 20 minutes. After talking about how SEGA is a mere shadow of what it once was (inorite?), I realized that I parked in a spot that said "10 Minute Parking STRICTLY ENFORCED", so I psychologically soil myself and put and end to the conversation to go find my car. What do I see outside? A tow truck with a black car behind it (I drive a black Altima). After a closer look, I realize its not mine. As relief rushes over me and I start to walk to my car, I realize that the black car wasn't attached to the tow truck at all. In fact, the tow truck is driving towards my spot and there is a guy behind my car on a cell phone. SHIT. So I book it and get out of there like its the last day of school. Score one for the home team.

Where am I going with all this? Nowhere really. I just wanted to highlight the good parts of my day before getting to the enema of failure. Good parts: got home fast, and dodged a parking ticket and towing fee. Now for mass defecation:

I put the disc in my 360, and firmly plant my ass on the couch. As I'm selecting my class (the ranger class of course) I notice the rendering gets incredibly bizarre. I think to myself "great, I haven't even fired a single shot yet and there are already bugs". Hoping it will correct itself later, I keep going through the opening cinematic. Once game play starts, the problem hasn't gone way. Super. I dump back to the dashboard thinking its a caching issue and everything will be better if I reload. Reload. No dice. So, I mutter a short series of mild expletives and begrudgingly reboot my 360. If you don't know what's about to happen, I suggest you stop reading now and maintain your blissful ignorance.

MY FUCKING XBOX DOESN'T BOOT

Now, I quite audibly unleash a much longer and more embittered string of fiery expletives delivered straight from hell's hottest oven. However, its not a RROD. Its only a single light, and the brain trust over at MS was nice enough to serve me an error code along with my steaming hot bowl of disappointment. Error code 74. Long story short, my GPU shat the bed with great vengeance and furious anger. This being my 5th 360, I was wise enough to get the warranty. 20/20 foresight on my part since this is NOT covered by the extended 'big f*cking oops' warranty MS rolled out a while ago.

This will make my 6th Xbox. Its really getting ridiculous now. If it weren't for warranties, I would be out thousands of dollars. However, I would like to thank the retailers for picking up the check for MS inexplicably bad manufacturing process.

Jakosifer
Aug 20, 2008, 09:04 PM
Ohhhhh snap.

Kylie
Aug 20, 2008, 09:09 PM
You should get with the PC/PS2 at least until it's been replaced. </3

Leviathan
Aug 20, 2008, 09:14 PM
X-Box breaks often. I heard it has an 16% failure rate. D;

Sorry to hear that. I'd cry if I were you. Especially if I got a new game.

<Shares sympathy pie.>

Powder Keg
Aug 20, 2008, 09:15 PM
6th? My god man....

Well, at the very least the bullet you dodged is the one you would have had to pay for.

Sidney
Aug 20, 2008, 09:21 PM
Wow, that really stinks... as much as I feel bad about your situation though, it sure was a blast to read! I really like your writing style! I laughed quite a few times while reading it. :lol:

Here's to hoping the XBOX gets better soon!

P.S.: I'm adding the term "enema of failure" to my lexicon.

Lyrix
Aug 20, 2008, 09:36 PM
...im glad my xbox hasnt exploded yet...*hopes i dont jinx it*

thats GOTTA suck though.

HAYABUSA-FMW-
Aug 20, 2008, 09:52 PM
Good job on the mad dash out the parking hell hole.

Bad job on the disc, Too Human, including human error?
Too much human error, not enough human ingenuity to get it right XBLOX.

I called up MYXBOX for something else a while ago and said I had purchased it one year later than I really did when prompted. Was going to call back about that, or they should remedy my mistake anywho, but I would like to get some 1 year just in case extra warranty in case of such things.

Best of luck with your latest Xbox so it won't be another Brick. Box. Blox. XBLOX.

Sord
Aug 20, 2008, 09:53 PM
6th xbox, good lord man. With how much warranty money is spent on you it would be cheaper for them to just send you a perfectly working one.

Seority
Aug 21, 2008, 02:50 AM
That was almost like a fairy tail story!
You should be a writer! :3
<Sorry and all that jazz. XBLOW is krappy, sadly.>

Adriano
Aug 21, 2008, 03:06 AM
I would've said fuck it at 3.
You must lub you some xbob.

amtalx
Aug 21, 2008, 09:00 AM
Well, I have a sizable library of 360 games. It would all be a waste if I abandoned the system. Besides I can always get back at MS by burning copies of Windows by the spindle and giving them out to friends and strangers alike.

stukasa
Aug 21, 2008, 01:25 PM
Your sixth Xbox?? Two is too many, six is beyond belief! ^^; To be honest that's one of the main reasons I never considered buying an Xbox (plus most of the games don't appeal to me). Good thing you have the warranty, but still, MS has been in the gaming business for a few years now, it's surprising they can't build a more reliable machine.

Zarode
Aug 21, 2008, 02:11 PM
X-Box breaks often. I heard it has an 16% failure rate. D;

It's SO SO SO MUCH higher then that, I swear it is.


Eh, at least you are quick on your feet. :wacko:

McLaughlin
Aug 21, 2008, 03:08 PM
That's a bummer, dood. I hope you get it replaced soon.

Apparently, the only stroke of good luck I've ever had (and likely ever will) was getting a launch console that lasted the two and a half years that it did. It died, I sent it in, got it back within four days. My Elite works fine too.

Of course, this is all offset by my internet connection as of late. >_>

Darkly
Aug 22, 2008, 09:12 AM
i remember the guy at gamestation tellin me the 360 has a 6 month lifespan lol.

Anywho you should write more rants, it was a good read.

Mewnie
Aug 22, 2008, 05:07 PM
The only good use for a 360 ;3


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sKUyQUifHS8

amtalx
Aug 22, 2008, 05:42 PM
I was waiting for him to fly into a rage and just toss it out the window the ENTIRE time.