Get Well Soon, Spaceman 【"Ash" posted 9.18.11】

[CupOfCoffee]

• • •

[qoxolg]

I like the idea of the story. Pioneer 2 being like that isn't that strange, since all of the serious guys (main forces of the military and scientists) were on Pioneer 1, which left Pioneer 2 with a bunch of citizens/hunters from 10 different nations.

Anyway, I really am digging this, especially since I am busy with doing a PSO based comic (I am doing quite some research on the story of PSO). Seeing your view on this story is very interesting and I might even use some of your ideas.


One thing I don't get about the PSO timeline is that it says that in AUW 3083 Rico forms a self-defence group called 'Hunters'. Since thats only one year before PSO takes place, that would mean the most of the hunters aboard Pioneer 2 are a bunch of mercenaries/assholes that would like to make some meseta.

Anyway, good read! :)

[PhotonDrop]

Oh wow, that was pretty funny. Looking forward to the next chapter :)

[McLaughlin]

Great stuff, as always.

[Seth Astra]

Huh. Couldda sworn I commented. Either way, funny as heck. Keep it up, or I will find something with milk to do with you.

Hmm...
Water-boarding with milk?
Milkboarding?
*Evil laugh.*

[McLaughlin]

That conversation was hilarious.

[qoxolg]

Must have been quite hard to make that conversation without messing it up.. good job!

[Seth Astra]

Hillarious. One question, though: Do you watch Doctor Who? This seems like something that would fit as one of the lighter stories. At very least, Matha reminded me of a recent episode.

[qoxolg]

Hey, you're right! I also thought it was Martha.. I thought you misspelled it for some reason.. :wacko: then again.. I remember there being some spelling errors of names throughout the game.

Did you know you can actually see the names of all NPC's in a level by using the auto-chat function? (the 'Hello > will create team' stuff).

[qoxolg]

gahaha more vomit! I like your idea of the teleports.. especially with the very trustworthy company that made it.. I wouldn't be surprised it it had some hidden banners / commercials in it.

Can't wait for the other 12 chapters :wacko:

[McLaughlin]

"When did I drink grape juice?"

And now I can't stop laughing.

[qoxolg]

Don't worry. I also sometimes have to giggle about funny's/jokes I make up in my head.. I guess it's just a normal habit.. thats is, if you can classify me as a 'normal' person :wacko:

[AzureBlaze]

I have to wonder, since the whole milk thing presists...
Did you use the wayback machine to somehow discover the Milk Puking League of America (MPLA) in order to inspire this particular twist?

*They did exist, in America (really now, where else would something like this be, because Australia already has the Underwater Ironing & Mountaineer Ironing championships) of dudes who would down a half-gallon and photograph the result while hurling it all back up off the sides of high objects, or just in the yard. I don't think it had a purpose other than photography, and understandably didn't stick around long enough to find out.

I know it wasn't very popular (gee) and I don't even remember why I know about it. Maybe SomethingAwful.com linked to them back in the day. But this story reminded me and it's so obscure I had to ask.

[qoxolg]

a mix of 2 Girls 1 Cup
Instantly I understood haha.. While I was still studying spreading that particular video was quite popular (or opening it on someones laptop while he was away, and watching the face when he opened the laptop). I think 'Thubgirl' had the same reputation :wacko:

[Broken_L_button]

Wow. The story is hilarious so far. So much, that I'm actually regretting having a glass of milk while reading it. At any rate, can't wait for Chapter 4!

[Seth Astra]

Once again, WTF-tastic, LOL-worthy writing.

[qoxolg]

I lol'd at the Booma dancing! I always wondered why they trow their hand in the air when you meet them, but this is a good explanation.. :wacko:

[GCoffee]

This is hilarious!

[PhotonDrop]

Let the record show that the stranger the story gets, the better it gets.

Intepretive dance... that's just awesome :wacko:

[Xaeris]

I laugh while reading this. I could say some other stuff, but is there any higher praise?

[McLaughlin]

That dance scene felt legitimately emotional, I thought. Great work again.

[McLaughlin]

Yeah, I remember that 'fic. Wish I could write half as well as some of the people here, but hey, that's what practice is for.

Very much looking forward to the next installment. Love the name of your fictional band too.

[Xaeris]

"Techniques are fake," Ash said with a dismissive wave of his hand. "I can't tell you how many horrible partners the Guild has stuck me with over the years that claimed to know how to do Resta, the healing one. They screw their mouths up and wave their hands around in the air and their faces turn unhealthy colors and then they let out a big, explosive exhale, and they give me this look like I'm supposed to be impressed, like something actually happened. And then they ask me if I feel any better. And I look down at whatever part of me was bleeding, and of course it's always still bleeding, and—"

I lol'ed. Considering how much effort I've put into imagining the world's mechanics, I'm surprised I never considered the possibility of fakers.

[qoxolg]

I just read Chapter 5 (just got back from a short vacation). It was a nice read.

I am still making up my own theories about TECHs. I am wondering what you will come up with :D

[McLaughlin]

Morton kind of reminds me of Captain Hook.

Great chapter!

[NoiseHERO]

HAH! I never wanna have sex again!

[Xaeris]

I love the heroic entry. It might be criticized as cheesy, overdone, cliche, implausible, or whatever, but I'm a sucker for a last minute rescue. Especially when it's got style. As many (excellent) fresh ideas you have here, I'm glad you're not neglecting the staples.

[Broken_L_button]

An awesome, hilarious chapter once again! Kudos on that! I love the "English Gentleman" attitude the robot ushers have.

[PhotonDrop]

Mia Grave: Genre Savvy.

[Xaeris]

It sounded like a mix between a foreign sports car and a serious chest injury.

Well, there's a word I'm never reading the same way again.

[McLaughlin]

You say there's no such thing as puzzle homework, but you don't know.

You just don't know.

[Seth Astra]

Here's a question: If this is only 7 years in the past, how could Ash become his own grandfather? Is his grandmother also a time traveler? Interesting that Ash caused the entire catastrophy of Episode 1. But, at least Pauline did a great service to the hunters of the future.

[Seth Astra]

Oh, believe me, I shut off my common sense whenever I click the link to this thread.

[Xaeris]

lol, it's not the first time the butterfly effect's been done, but these were hilarious. Moore's an asshole indeed.

[Broken_L_button]

Mr. Grave should replace his glass tables with wooden ones. Once again, an extremely funny and well-written chapter. Good work!

Also, regarding the previous chapter:


Vagina. It sounded like a mix between a foreign sports car and a serious chest injury.

Vagina = Volvo + angina

...If you forget for a second that Volvos aren't exactly sports cars and that angina isn't exactly an injury (it's still related to the chest, though), it makes perfect sense.

[PhotonDrop]

All the quirkyness in the Grave family... Marshal and Lilian aren't cousins, are they?

[qoxolg]

I lol'd about Moores law (how many people here actually know it?) and the Mags.. :wacko:

[McLaughlin]

Please be Mome.

[McLaughlin]

Hating someone for their PJs is harsh.

Great stuff.

[qoxolg]

Though you can still go all ways with Osto. He is a mad scientist after all! Growing big worms and infecting old man with D-cels and computer AI.. hmm..

Nice chapter by the way. I loved the part with the Magic rocks (wasn't there another one beside moola?)

[McLaughlin]

I felt so smart for getting the Salinger reference.

[McLaughlin]

Is anything Mome does glamourous?

Can't wait for more.

[McLaughlin]

Hyle crept like a mongoose

I'm not sure why, but this made me laugh like a hyena.

Great stuff.

[Seth Astra]

"We need to stop murdering so many people,"
This is an epic quote. I may use it (just in the singular).

[Seth Astra]

The ending of that chapter was the best part. A very funny best part.

[McLaughlin]

"Inertia is a property of matter," she whispered tearfully.

Something something, Bill Nye the Science Guy.

Great chapter.

[Seth Astra]

Hah, I remember that show. I used to watch it when I was, like, 3. It was pretty cool.

[Seth Astra]

15.

And I am now very excited for an upcoming chapter. I love physics-breaking weapons. Designing them is even a hobby of mine.

[McLaughlin]

That last paragraph is a work or art, my friend.

Edit: And I did indeed need to google the reference. Worth it, though.

[Seth Astra]

Not too exciting, but that's more plot development in one chapter than the entire rest of the story.

[qoxolg]

Awesome! you just motivated me to draw your requests :wacko:

[McLaughlin]

Robot indigestion is never a good sign.

[McLaughlin]

That's almost exactly how I had her pictured.

[qoxolg]

That is pretty much thanks to your detailed writing! The only thing that wasn't in your description is the Whitill tattoo I added to her left arm (using the ID calculator, for RAmarl). Usually when I design PSO clothes that are not from the game, I always add something for the section ID. In the WORKS controlled future, I can imagine they got rid of those sections, hunters being more of a necessity, not a job. In order to honor the hunters, I figured adding the section ID as a tattoo would be cool.

[blace]

Well isn't that a twist. Not the surprising kind but more like when and where it happened. Who know Vol Opt was into that kind of stuff anywqy.

[FOkyasuta]

-3- Wow. Just wow.

[Seth Astra]

That ending was hillarious. Simply hillarious.

[blace]

Pardon my typos and such, was rushed and was on a phone when I typed it up.

Anyway, I never thought of that rod that way being his possible phallus, considering that the rod comes out right in the middle of where his "body" is. Thanks for making the fight with Vol Opt that much more uncomfortable knowing he could be jizzing all over us when he does that.

[McLaughlin]

I'll never look at Vol Opt the same way again.

[McLaughlin]

I had never thought Unicorns would be particularly adept at combat. I see the noble variety is no better.

Hilarious and gripping at the same time. Great chapter.

[Seth Astra]

Wow, that was deadly serious. I liked it. You are a brilliant writer.

[Seth Astra]

Actually, making her an antihero just made me like Laurel more. I like antiheroes, what can I say?

[McLaughlin]

Great work. Again.

[McLaughlin]

Red > Blue.

Come at me, bro.

[Xaeris]

You (along with a couple others) have been a consistently good thread supporter, so thanks also for that. It's always thrilling to see the thread link in bold and a Most Recent Poster who is not me when I make my PSOW rounds.



Obs is good for that, isn't he?

I had some catching up to do, which I did yesterday. The story remains hellaciously entertaining, though I have to admit I'm a little worried if you can follow the act of Vol Opt/WORKS, but you haven't given me a reason to doubt you yet.

[Seth Astra]

This is bad.

And yay, paradoxes!

[McLaughlin]

Oh no no no no no, my friend, you've got that a bit backwards. Vulpix and Ninetails alone beat out any of the weird Electabuzzes and shit to be found in Red. Plus, on Gameboy Color, the Red version's whole world looked creepy and bloodstained, and Ash was green. Blue was much easier on the eyes. (I actually owned both at different points, though. Haha. And Yellow, too!)

Arcanine. That is all.

(I definitely owned all three from each generation all the way up until Black/White. I'm a sucker like that).

[qoxolg]

I sure have laughed! though I really had to hold it in a few times in the Bus (I usually read stuff during my Bus ride from work which is 20~30 minutes), else people would think I am a weirdo that laughs at his telephone :wacko:

Can't wait for the ending! If you want me to draw more stuff for your story's you can always drop a request :D (actually I've always been open for request, people just never noticed)

[McLaughlin]

That backwards talk has me rolling every time.

[Seth Astra]

You are brilliant.

[blace]

That backwards talk has me rolling every time.
This.

[Seth Astra]

Wow, Responsibility really was his middle name.

[blace]

A.A.A.R.A.A.

His initials sounds like an really obscure corporation.

[McLaughlin]

closed her eyes and thought of fooseball, and had healed the damage within seconds.

That might be one of my favorite lines from the entire story.

Great work, dude.

[Seth Astra]

That was a nice ending. You just made my day (and I was already having a great day).

[Xaeris]

"Marry me, Pauline," Ash said. Irene stirred by her wall and muttered something about satisfaction.

"No," Pauline replied, shaking her head.

"C'mon," Ash insisted.

"Not yet. Don't propose to me in a hallway with blood all over your arms and no shirt on. Ask me again later. On the Rough Wave."

I lol'ed. Anyway, your finished product is a thing of excellence and I'm happy to have read it. It was great laughs garnered more through witty writing than crude jokes (though a good ratio was struck), and it was carried by entertaining protagonists. The epilogue was just sweet, I think I actually tasted it while I was reading it.

And you think they hottified Irene? Check out what they did with the bank chick. They put a pair of serious gazongas on that lady. I mean, dayum.

[McLaughlin]

http://30.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ljbvvyIi2f1qg8i80o1_500.jpg

E-fist bump.

[Seth Astra]

Umm... How do I get the file on my Android Phone? When I try and follow the link on my phone, I get some weird computer code-esque text. But it works normal on my computer. Help please?

[qoxolg]

Works fine on my iPhone, it automatically prompts me to open it in the default books app.

[Seth Astra]

I did DL an e-reader. Still won't work.

[Seth Astra]

That makes me happy.

[McLaughlin]

Totally worth it.

[XTenguX]

Yay youre making another one:D.

Spaceman was great and you had me laughing a lot with the dialoge lol.

It was very descriptive to the point that i could SEE the scene in my minds eye and it was touching as well.

But ONE line stayed with me till the end:

"MOORE'S AN ASSHOLE"XDXD

[qoxolg]

Is it already a year ago that you wrote this one?

One of the reasons why a fic for the original PSO worked so well, was because the story of PSO was full of holes and there was plenty of room to use your own idea's. The game never tried to tell an epic story, heck you had to do some major research to be able to grasp just some bits of story and stitch them together.

[XTenguX]

Oh well that explains Seven,i was reading it too .

Thats too bad that you lost your inspiration,thats like the most important part there.

Hope you inspired again and good luck:)

Oh yeah i forgot to mention.

I had a mental image of Ash,if any of you has played Xenogears beflol.

Ash's description reminded me of Jassie(hes a guy dont worry lol).

[XTenguX]

Oh well that explains Seven,i was reading it too .

Thats too bad that you lost your inspiration,thats like the most important part there.

Hope you inspired again and good luck:)