KaOsTheOry12
Sep 12, 2003, 10:19 PM
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Episode 1 - A Gun? What's that?
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Aaron Jecan, media icon extraordinare and hero of the masses, arrives from his recent hunt in the Forest. During his battles, he comes across a weapon known as a Cannon. Having sold many of these, Aaron never thinks for a minute to actually USE one. But they are such confusing systems. Aaron much rather prefers his basic good old Agito and his Varista.
Arriving at the Weapons shop, he greets the weapon seller. ( We'll call him Bobby, just for kicks. )
Bobby: " Fair greetings to ya, Aaron J! "
Aaron: " Bobby, my man, my man, have I got some stuff for you. "
Bobby: " Oh, good! We can always use more weapons to sell to the other hunters. What have you for me today? "
Aaron: " Feast your eyes upon this! It looks surprisingly complex. "
Aaron removes the Cannon from his shoulder and places it on the counter. A nearby Ranger idlely glances over. ( We'll name this ranger Houston, again for kicks. )
Bobby: " Hmmm... A Cannon. I can give you about 1400 Meseta for it. "
Aaron: " Bobby, buddy, what're ya doin' to me? This baby is super high-tech. I can't even USE this thing. It HAS to be worth more than that! "
Houston approaches the haggling dealers.
Houston: " Pardon for interrupting... I noticed the Cannon over from the distance there. You're Aaron J, right? "
Aaron: " Aaron Jecan, Hero of the People, and the Master of Damn Fine Hair. How can I help? "
Houston: " The Cannon... " Houston says as he picks up the weapon. " ... is a rather fine shotgun-style weapon. Why don't you use it rather than selling it? "
Aaron: " I can't use a Shotgun. They're so bloody complex that I could never figure it out. I'll stick to my sword, thanks. "
Houston: " What's so confusing? You point the weapon, pull the trigger and BAM!... There's no more critter. "
Aaron stares dumbfoundly at the man.
Aaron: .... I don't follow you.
Houston ( slightly annoyed now ): " How can't you follow me? POINT... CLICK... DEAD.... "
Aaron: ... I still don't get it.
Houston (now even more annoyed): " Oh, come on! You can't understand that?! How the hell are you some super hero if you can't even understand how to use a gun?! "
Aaron: " Oh, I use a gun. "
Houston: " I mean, come on, it's one of the... Wait, what? "
Aaron: " I use a gun. " Aaron unholsters his famous handgun, The Varista.
Houston: " THEN WHAT DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND ABOUT THE CANNON?! "
Aaron: " They're so complex. "
Houston is now infuriated with Aaron.
Houston: " Look! Hold this gun like this... " Houston gives Aaron the Cannon and sets it up right. " and your gun like this... " He then puts Aaron's Varista in his other hand.
Aaron: " Man, this is getting confusing. "
Houston: " Okay, do you see the similarities? All you have to do is pull the trigger on the cannon. "
Aaron: " ... What? "
Houston: " PULL. THE. TRIGGER. "
Aaron: " Where's the Trig.. How did you pronounce it? "
Houston points to the Varista's Trigger.
Houston: " THIS! "
Aaron: " Oh! The trigger! Well, why didn't you say so? "
Aaron then points the handgun at the wall and fires, with a deadly accuracy.
Houston: " Okay, show off, now use the cannon the same way. "
Aaron: " Which way? I don't understand this thing. How do I turn it on? "
Houston, now seething mad, grabs Aaron by the arm with the cannon, and points the cannon at the wall. He then forces Aaron's finger to pull the cannon's trigger, and it fires a burst at the shop's wall.
Houston: Now do you understand?!
Aaron: " WOW! That was incredible! How did you do that?! "
Houston, screaming, runs from the shop.
Bobby: ".... Okay, I'll give you 2200 Meseta for it. "
Aaron: " That's better. See you later, Bobby. "
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The End
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KaOs; the only theory worth mentioning
Episode 1 - A Gun? What's that?
-----
Aaron Jecan, media icon extraordinare and hero of the masses, arrives from his recent hunt in the Forest. During his battles, he comes across a weapon known as a Cannon. Having sold many of these, Aaron never thinks for a minute to actually USE one. But they are such confusing systems. Aaron much rather prefers his basic good old Agito and his Varista.
Arriving at the Weapons shop, he greets the weapon seller. ( We'll call him Bobby, just for kicks. )
Bobby: " Fair greetings to ya, Aaron J! "
Aaron: " Bobby, my man, my man, have I got some stuff for you. "
Bobby: " Oh, good! We can always use more weapons to sell to the other hunters. What have you for me today? "
Aaron: " Feast your eyes upon this! It looks surprisingly complex. "
Aaron removes the Cannon from his shoulder and places it on the counter. A nearby Ranger idlely glances over. ( We'll name this ranger Houston, again for kicks. )
Bobby: " Hmmm... A Cannon. I can give you about 1400 Meseta for it. "
Aaron: " Bobby, buddy, what're ya doin' to me? This baby is super high-tech. I can't even USE this thing. It HAS to be worth more than that! "
Houston approaches the haggling dealers.
Houston: " Pardon for interrupting... I noticed the Cannon over from the distance there. You're Aaron J, right? "
Aaron: " Aaron Jecan, Hero of the People, and the Master of Damn Fine Hair. How can I help? "
Houston: " The Cannon... " Houston says as he picks up the weapon. " ... is a rather fine shotgun-style weapon. Why don't you use it rather than selling it? "
Aaron: " I can't use a Shotgun. They're so bloody complex that I could never figure it out. I'll stick to my sword, thanks. "
Houston: " What's so confusing? You point the weapon, pull the trigger and BAM!... There's no more critter. "
Aaron stares dumbfoundly at the man.
Aaron: .... I don't follow you.
Houston ( slightly annoyed now ): " How can't you follow me? POINT... CLICK... DEAD.... "
Aaron: ... I still don't get it.
Houston (now even more annoyed): " Oh, come on! You can't understand that?! How the hell are you some super hero if you can't even understand how to use a gun?! "
Aaron: " Oh, I use a gun. "
Houston: " I mean, come on, it's one of the... Wait, what? "
Aaron: " I use a gun. " Aaron unholsters his famous handgun, The Varista.
Houston: " THEN WHAT DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND ABOUT THE CANNON?! "
Aaron: " They're so complex. "
Houston is now infuriated with Aaron.
Houston: " Look! Hold this gun like this... " Houston gives Aaron the Cannon and sets it up right. " and your gun like this... " He then puts Aaron's Varista in his other hand.
Aaron: " Man, this is getting confusing. "
Houston: " Okay, do you see the similarities? All you have to do is pull the trigger on the cannon. "
Aaron: " ... What? "
Houston: " PULL. THE. TRIGGER. "
Aaron: " Where's the Trig.. How did you pronounce it? "
Houston points to the Varista's Trigger.
Houston: " THIS! "
Aaron: " Oh! The trigger! Well, why didn't you say so? "
Aaron then points the handgun at the wall and fires, with a deadly accuracy.
Houston: " Okay, show off, now use the cannon the same way. "
Aaron: " Which way? I don't understand this thing. How do I turn it on? "
Houston, now seething mad, grabs Aaron by the arm with the cannon, and points the cannon at the wall. He then forces Aaron's finger to pull the cannon's trigger, and it fires a burst at the shop's wall.
Houston: Now do you understand?!
Aaron: " WOW! That was incredible! How did you do that?! "
Houston, screaming, runs from the shop.
Bobby: ".... Okay, I'll give you 2200 Meseta for it. "
Aaron: " That's better. See you later, Bobby. "
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The End
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KaOs; the only theory worth mentioning