PDA

View Full Version : FanFic: Moon-Rock Soup (complete short story)



MQuantum
Nov 30, 2003, 07:11 PM
Hi all, I'm back into this! Ok, this 'ere's a little short story, just an inspiration on a 7 hour trip...

Working on my old fic, new chapter probably in the month, and maybe the first bit of something I've been cooking for a while... we'll see.

Well, until then, Ooooooie....!!

*Note: This isn't as messed up as LSD's fight with Falz.
_____________________

Once upon a time there was a story that began with once upon a time... And was meant to be funny...



Two hunters warped to the surface of Ragol, with the assignment from Principal Tyrell to clear the whole of the Forests of all native resistance.

"d00d, 1 pwns joo 411!!!11!1? Bob shouted. He ran into the first room as Fred sighed and walked after him.

"Yes you do, little level one hacker..." He entered the clearing in time to see a booma's sharp claw fall on his 'friend?s' head. Bob flopped to the ground with an OMG!!!1!1!!!1, and a little white ball began hovering above his chest protectively.

"n00b..." Fred pulled out a box labeled 'Insta-Moon: the multi-purpose atomizer!' but a vicious growl from the beary kute bears stopped him.

"Wazz dat, ponk?" Fred nearly dropped his package when the booma spoke.

"Uhhh, I was just going to make some soup from this moon-rock here," Fred lied. He slipped a glowing green rock from the Insta-package. "See?"

"Oh, I betta tell da Don Bird." He let out a deafening roar, and a few seconds later five rappy shadows appeared. Four little yellows arrived, packing Uzis, but the middle shadow kept getting larger and larger. Then a HUGE El Rappy smacked down, and his entourage scoured the area for danger.

"Eh, what's this, what's this?" The big rappy mumbled in a Godfather gangster accent. "Moon-rock soup?"

"Yep," said Fred, rather proudly. "All I need is a pot bigger than you and the water for it."

Intrigued, the Don Bird produced a HUGE pot, and told Fred to fill it. The Don Bird called up two hildebears to help Fred out.



*****

Ten minutes later, Fred had a merry fire going, and a HUGE pot of water. There were eight boomas, four rappy grunts, two hildebears, and the Don Bird there to witness the cooking of the rock.

*PLOP!*

"Dat's it?" The booma leader queried.

"That's it," Fred answered. "Although it would taste better if it had two or three yellow rappies to flavor it..."

"SQWAWWK!" *PLOP! PLOP!*

"You got your rappies, my man!" The Don Bird had personally ordered the hildebears to dump them in. "That's it?"

"Well, yes... But it would be even better if it had a little eggplant, too."

"Aoouuuur?!" One of the hildebears roared.

The other hildebear answered. "Yes, he said eggplant. I suppose we could use a monest... they look like eggplants!" They disappeared and returned with a slightly crushed and bruised monest, but it went in anyway.

*PLOP!*

"Aoouuuur?" The first hildebear asked.

"Yes, that's all there is to it. I'm sorry to ask again, but if you were to have three spare boomas, it would be wonderful. I'm afraid it won't be very tasty with only this in it."

"Gwwarrr!" *PLOP! PLOP! PLOP!*

Fred was beaming. "Thank you, I'm sure it would be perfect for the Don Bird now, but..."

"What's this, But what?!" The Don Bird was flapping his wings and drooling.

"Well, it would be a hundred times better with a hildebear."

"WHY ME?! JUST BECAUSE I CAN TALK?!" *PLOP!*

The other hildebear danced around happily. "Aoouuuur, aoou! Arrroooooouuoooo!"

"Well, I would let you eat it now, but... It needs some last seasoning. Why don't you guys go and get a star atomizer from the Dragon?"

There was a stampede, and Fred was alone. He quickly set up a table, placed flowers around it, and lit some candles.

"Let's see... Three rappies left, five boomas, and a hildebear. Add me, and we'll have ten places!" Plates and cutlery made an appearance. "Well, I'm done!"

Since he had nothing else to do, he sat down next to Bob and poked the swirling-bobble light; while Bob's green Pushan spammed hate-simple-mail at him.


*****

Half an hour later, the weary animals stumbled back. They presented him with the long sought after green box, and it went *PLOP!* too. They all took their seats, eager to try this moon-rock soup that was only made from moon-rock and water.

Fred circled around dishing out the good soup. When he got to the Don Bird, the Don Bird demanded the rock in his portion, but Fred just laughed. "No, no, I'm sorry, but that's the chef's honor!"

The soup that had taken over two hours to cook was gone in under two minutes, but everyone was satisfied. Except for Bob. And his Pushan.

"Boy, that was soooo good, I think I'll stop attacking hunters!" The Don Bird announced, and was echoed by eight other voices. "Next time you're going to make some more soup, come on down and let us have some!"

Fred gave his word that he would, and waved good-bye to the now-friendly departing animals. Once again he was alone with the bobbling white sphere and Bob.

Fred pulled out the moon-rock and took careful aim.

*WHAAPP!*

"//34r 4m 1?!!!!1!!111!1? Bob reached up and felt his head where there were two large bumps. "d00d, t|-|3y p//ns //3!!!1!"

"Well, it's time to go back and tell the principal the mission has been accomplished."

"d00d, |-|uh?!!!111!1? Bob scratched his head.

*WHAAPP!*

"n00b, I make you un-l33t!" Fred screamed, dropping the moon-rock.
_________________________________


Ok, folks, the moral of the story is which of these?

A.)Thinking on you feet can get you out of bad situations.
B.)l33tness is BAD!
C.)Moon atomizers are rocks.
D.)There must always be at least one drug reference in all of my stories. COCAINE!




<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: MQuantum on 2003-12-01 05:05 ]</font>

KaFKa
Nov 30, 2003, 07:18 PM
...now thats some good shit there, quantum. very funny http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif

MQuantum
Nov 30, 2003, 07:23 PM
What happened to the capitalized ends... I'm dissappointed... http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif

KaFKa
Nov 30, 2003, 07:27 PM
gOOD sHIT <----make you feel better quantum? (i was actually too lazy to do it the first time http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_razz.gif)

MQuantum
Nov 30, 2003, 07:34 PM
Yes, much better.

Skett
Nov 30, 2003, 07:40 PM
Congratulations. You have turned one of the most annoying PSO things (noobs getting but kicked after boasting) into one of the funniest fics on PSOW at the moment. This is actually pretty funny and was surprised when laughing escaped my mouth. Fanney!!


This post is rated F for Fanney!

MQuantum
Nov 30, 2003, 07:55 PM
yes, Skett likes it too! Yah!

of course, there's not an over abundance of funny fics at the moment... stay away, good comedians! lets me have my 15 minutes of fame!

KaFKa
Nov 30, 2003, 07:58 PM
uhh... you're currently at 17 minutes...

Robert_Wolf
Nov 30, 2003, 10:58 PM
Ok... Interesting. This is one of those stories that seems so absurd that it's funny. Is it bad that I understood it somehow? http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_confused.gif Anyway, very funny MQuantum. Hope to see more from you.

Garanz2
Dec 1, 2003, 06:59 AM
LOLOLOLOLOLOL!!!1!!1one!!1

*ahem*

Definitely one of the funnier shorts I've read in a while. Don rappy was funny. Maybe there's a rappy mafia! OH MY GOD!

MQuantum
Dec 1, 2003, 07:15 AM
Thank you for your compliments! http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif

Is it better to understand it and think it's funny than to not understand it at all and still think it's funny? http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif

And about the Don Rappy... I was poking around on Encarta to see if Don was really the word I wanted to use, and when I put it into the dictionary, several meanings popped up.

One was the Mafia one, but another was the Spanish head of the household. Since "El" is a Spanish prefix, AND the Bird seems like he runs a mafia, it's doublely effective, no? http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif

Robert_Wolf
Dec 1, 2003, 06:16 PM
Deep, dude. Very deep. Who would have thought that this fic could have such intellect lodged inside it. Very Nice.

mr_rubbish
Dec 1, 2003, 06:29 PM
Trippy Hippy Huggy Druggy...

PS Finish the next chapter of your damn fic already!

MQuantum
Dec 1, 2003, 06:57 PM
Give me another month on my fic, I beg of you!

Well, I think I've gotten over my rush of work to do, so, I can begin working on it again. Unfortunately, that involves typing the stupid thing...

Carpel tunnel is not your friend...