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View Full Version : FanFic: Gaishen Dye Noer - Chapter 2



Sord
Jan 9, 2004, 01:44 AM
I hated my other two fics and decided to start from scratch.


Chapter 1

He tossed and turned in his sleep, dreaming of the past few days.


* * * * * *Seph sighed. How come Pioneer one always sends out hunters for exploration? I'm only sixteen and a graduate from the Hunter Academy, and they drop me off fifty miles from the dome to explore the land. What the hell are they doing with the military?" he grumbled to no one.

Seph continued to hack through the forest with his favored weapon, the Tsumikiri J-sword. All he knew about it was its poem. His parents had died exploring Ragol, but they had told him the saying of the sword many times. They always said it in a poem. However it was always in another language.

Gaishen dye noer,
Klei cha tou,
Jalou dye cliesha,
Tolia dye regit Gaishen,
Kly gwar shi na,
Gui kig jie noy,

No one ever knew a translation. His family only seemed to know the poem, but not why it went with the sword. Supposedly it was a gift given to his family from the ancient Agito dynasty.

Seph continued to hack, ignoring any animals, and they ignored him. The sun was setting, he needed to break camp. He managed to find a clearing. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small purple cube. He pressed down on a bump, and then threw it a few feet away.

The cube melted into a puddle. It wiggled a bit, but didn't move otherwise. "Damn it! How does a government expect me to explore without a properly working nano-tent!" Seph looked around. He saw a tree that had two roots that rose out of the ground a foot; the trunk in between them had sunken back a bit.

He inspected the tree. He realized it was a glaish, a relatively normal tree, but its bark was softer then others. Seph sighed and set his pack down. He would need to rest if he was going to trek the fifty miles back to the dome.

Setting his pack down, Seph sat between the roots, using them as arm rests. He laid back and drifted to sleep.

Seph awoke, hearing a few mechanical blip and beeps. He rubbed his eyes and looked into a giant, silver light. Seph yelped and the light jumped back. Seph now saw what the light was coming from. It was a mag, some strange kind of biotechnology that was discovered running wild on Ragol.

He grumbled. He had gotten scared for nothing. He wandered what his sensei would think about that. He watched the mag moving up and down, letting out its strange noises. Seph rolled his eyes in annoyance.

Standing up, Seph grabbed his bag and sword. He looked at the mini compass on his watch. At least this planet had poles. He began to walk and the mag hovered up behind his right shoulder, moving with him. Seph didn't really mind, accept it wouldn?t shut up. "Be quite or I go away." The mag let out a little bleep and fell silent.

Seph walked endlessly, only stopping to pick and eat fruits from various trees. When night finally fell, Seph had to sleep on the ground, using his pack as a pillow.

In the morning he continued his trek. Suddenly the forest went mute. Seph stopped and listened. Nothing happened, and then he saw a beam shoot out from where the dome was and make contact with a beam from space.

Seph had no clue that the beam from space was Pioneer 2. The beams disappeared. There was a loud explosion, and a giant sphere of blue lightning rose from the dome area. It spread for what seemed several miles. Suddenly a wind of magnificent force hit Seph.

Seph was blown onto his back. The mag following him was knocked into some brush. All the trees bent over and dust blew everywhere. The wind lasted for about five seconds before stopping.

Seph stood up, mag floating up behind them. He then heard a loud screech. Suddenly a giant orange mass burst into view. It shot fire into the air, followed by a mid air roll before diving back out of view.

Seph stared, eyes wide. He knew everyone was dead; no one could have survived these strange events. Suddenly Seph's body moved, and he was running west, between the way he came and the direction of the dome.

He ran, and ran, and ran. It began to rain, the ground became slippery. Seph slipped on mud and tripped on roots. Each time he got back up and kept running. Soon his body felt cold, and then it went numb. He kept on running, his subconscious pushing him forward.

Everything began to slow down. He began to hear each drop of rain land, slowly, hearing each and every compression of the sound waves. The world seemed to spin. Seph fell again, unconscious before he hit the ground.


* * * * * *
Seph finally woke. He tried to scream from the pain, but it only made his throat feel as if it was on fire. He lapsed back into unconsciousness. Waking up again, he realized he was on his back. The mag was hovering above him, letting a strange sparkle of light fall onto him.

He realized there was no pain. He tried to speak, "Wha, what are you doing?" he asked the mag. It let out a few blips and bleeps and stopped. Seph sat up and shook his head. How long had he been out?

Figuring it wouldn't matter, he looked at his compass watch. He was facing the direction he came from. He quickly turned around, taking a step. He smashed straight into a wall.

Seph fell on his rear, nose throbbing. "DAMN IT!" he shouted. He stood up and walked backward. He had walked into what appeared to be an entrance to a tomb.

He had run into the door of it. Strangely, it had a sort of knob. There was writing on it. He walked up to the door and stared closely at the writing. It appeared to be some kind of characters. He reached his hand up and touched it.

Suddenly everything went white and he heard his sword's poem, reverberating in the empty whiteness. Suddenly his vision snapped back. On reflex he withdrew his hand quickly.

What the hell was going on? Seph stared at the door with the writing. He slowly reached the knob. He turned it, pushing the door. The door opened the rest of the way, squeaking on what was probably hinges. Seph stared into the tomb. It was black. "Well, I have nothing to lose." Seph took a step into the black abyss.

EDIT: question mark crap, one word change, and one grammar change, other stuff

So whadya think?




<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Sord on 2004-01-08 22:56 ]</font>


<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Sord on 2004-01-08 22:57 ]</font>


<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Sord on 2004-01-09 10:10 ]</font>


<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Sord on 2004-01-09 10:46 ]</font>

Nai_Calus
Jan 9, 2004, 02:38 AM
Not bad so far. You're a better descriptive writer than I am, heh. XD And it held my interest enough for me to read through it, I'm one of those people who tend to wander off to do whatever in the middle of reading something unless it's got my interest enough, so.

Keep it up. ^^

Sord
Jan 9, 2004, 01:46 PM
Well, after working late into the night (and getting up at 11:00 this morning.) Here is chapter two.


Chapter 2

Seph walked completely in. The stone door slammed shut behind him. "Shit! Now how am I going to get out of here?!" His mag bleeped and turned its light on full power. It moved the beam over the walls and floor.
The circle of light stopped on a large ring attached to the floor. The mag blipped and bleeped excitedly. Seph walked over to the ring. He grabbed it, and then pulled. He fell back on his butt again.
After a long stream of curses, he finally paid attention to what he was holding. The wrung was attached to a large, thin, square piece of rock. Apparently he had ripped it clear off its hinges.
Standing up, he looked into the hole with the help of his mag. It led to stairs. Suddenly his mag began beeping rapidly. It started to go down the decline. "Hey, where do you think your going?!"
Seph then realized he either stayed in this dark, or go down the steps. He sighed and started following the mag. The stairs seemed endless. His step reverberated down the tunnel. He finally hit bottom and expecting another step, stumbled.
He regained his balance. His mag blipped a few times. Suddenly torches just lit up along the wall. Seph looked around; he appeared to be in some kind of vast, circular chamber.
In the center was a small shrine. On either side of it, horns protruded from it and then two more small horns protruded from each of them. Laid between the crooks was a sword.

It was shaped exactly like his own. The blade seemed to be made out of crystal. The hilt was a kind of rich purple stone. At the base of the hilt was a bright green stone.

He walked up to the shrine. Before he could do anything, a white ball of light shot out of the shrine and went into his chest. Seph flew back on his rear yet again, but wasn't in the normal state of mind.

Seph's mind's eye opened. He saw a planet. He saw an alien race. They looked almost human, but had a bright, white, glow to them. Over their shoulders hovered what looked like various forms of mags.

Time seemed to speed up. The aliens where battling a great evil, one that threatened to destroy them. The battle lasted for two centuries. In the end, the bright people managed to trick the leader and his minions of evil in a ship.

All but two died in the attempt. All the others had been bait to lure the evil into a chamber of a ship, once in the chamber, the evil was locked in. So were the bright people. The monstrous beast riding a four headed animal slaughtered all of them with the help of his dominions.

The two that lived drove the ship. One left the ship and jettisoned toward a far star. Seph's mind followed the jettisoned ship. It wasn't a star it was heading for, it was a planet. Seph realized it was Cloral.

The ship landed their, and the bright man made his way through the land. Anyone who saw him, bowed to him. He claimed his name was Agito. So many people bowed down to him, he became emperor. During his time he forged a sword.

He worked on it day after day, night after night. The only timed he paused was when an assistant told him the problems of the people, which he in turn told the assistant what to do.

When Agito had finished the sword he decided to pick a bride. A large crowd of women where summoned to the palace. Agito inspected all of them. He finally chose a bride. She wasn't the prettiest girl, but she wasn't ugly either. Seph thought she looked familiar.

Suddenly time seemed to accelerate at an amazing speed. Civilizations were created and destroyed. Wars lost and won. The world's geography changed. Through all this the Agito family continued to live on, passing the blade to its each and only son. The son would then pass the sword on to his son, for several years.

Now the names of the Agito had changed, it was Arigato. Seph saw his grand father, then his dad, then himself being born. Suddenly his mind shifted back to the ship with the evil trapped inside.

The driver of the ship purposely crashed it into a planet. The man left the ship. Over time he worked on a sword as well, using materials he had brought. He worked and worked, eating, drinking, and sleeping only when needed.

He finished the sword. He then began to build a tomb, his tomb. When it was finally done, he cast a spell so that the entrance may only be seen by the savoir. He sealed himself in the tomb, with the sword. He placed it on a shrine, and then he died. His life had been spent making the sword and the tomb; the spell had taken the last bit of anything he had left.

Seph's mind shifted again, and he was standing in space, galaxies, planets, and stars where everywhere. Seph just stood in the center of it all. So did the bright man. He opened his mouth and spoke. It wasn't in Seph's normal tongue; it was the language the poem of the sword was spoken in.

Seph knew the language. It was his peoples' language. He understood everything the bright man said. He spoke the poem of the sword, but now Seph understood it.

"Darkness will fall,
Two need be one,
Another will remember,
Both will fight darkness,
Only they stand a chance,
For good to survive."

"What is that supposed to mean?" Seph chocked out.

The man sighed, "The beast is the Darkness; the two are the swords; you are the one who remembers. Combine the swords and defeat the darkness. We knew we could not defeat the Darkness, so we sealed him away. We knew he would escape one day, so we set out our plan. You have seen it all, because you are the plan."

"I'm?supposed to kill that, that, whatever it was! I'm only sixteen! I don't have anyone on my side! No one is alive to help me! All I have for a weapon is a sword! How am I supposed to kill that thing, as well as his minions?!"

"By combining the swords, also you will have my friend there to help you."

"What friend?"

"Why, the mag of course."

"If that is your mag, why is there more than just one?"

"All the other mags are the dead ones' mags."

"Oh?" Seph stated, sorry he had asked.

"It is no matter. My mag shall aid you. If you want out of my tomb, then combine the swords. That is all."

Seph felt like he had been whipped back into consciousness, which he had. He opened his eye's to see the ball of light begin to fade, and then disappear. Seph stood up and walked over to the crystal sword. He drew his own sword with one hand, and picked up the crystal one with the other.

He pointed them both up and held them close together. He didn't know how he knew this would work, only that it would. A bolt of energy sprang from one sword to the other.

Seph jumped back, letting go of the swords. They remained hovering in the air. They began to push against each other. Energy was sparking off of the two swords dramatically. The energy gave off to much light, soon Seph had to block his eyes, and then close them.

Seph no longer heard the cackle of energy, he opened his eyes. He was outside of the tomb. For that matter, the tomb had disappeared. The shrine hadn't though. On it sat his sword. It was encased in the jeweled one.

He picked the sword up. It was surprisingly light. He stared at the edge and got dizzy from trying to see how sharp it was. He swung the sword in a horizontal swing.

A loud whoosh erupted from the sword. A trail of blue energy shot forward from it and cut through a tree and then two others before it cackled away. Seph opened his eyes wide and quickly sheathed his sword. Only realizing it fit in the sheath after he had put it in, much to his surprise.

The mag appeared and began to form into a blob. It then began to take another shape. When it was done, it looked like a cat, but with out any back paws, it just ended in a tale. It was black with silver padded paws and a blade along the top of its tale. It eye's where silver as well.

"What are you supposed to be now?" Seph said in an arrogant tone. The thing hovered right until there was in inch between either of their faces. It opened its mouth and said, "I'm a Sato!" in a high, perky voice.

Seph yelled and jumped back, before losing his balance and falling on his ass for what seemed to be the millionth time in one day. "This is one hell of a way to live," Seph thought.





Any feedback? Thoughts? Comments? Constructive Criticism?

Sagasu
Jan 9, 2004, 06:42 PM
Is it chocked, or choked? http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif

Its moving nicely, keep at it bud.

Jaks
Jan 14, 2004, 09:14 PM
Damn! Someone better fic writer than me.

Zebulan7
Jan 14, 2004, 09:20 PM
Nice job, becoming enjoyable, not that it wasn't at first. stopping now with that...

Nice writing, not that I'm set up to be a critic for anyone.