FanFic: The Immortal Feather - Chapter 1 - Birth of a demon

[Garanz2]

If you're not Mr_Rubbish, I bet you didn't see this coming. http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif I'm totally rewriting IHTIF, with some new characters and a TOTALLY different storyline. I'm going to step up my writing efforts into high-ass gear and get this done. Also, I'm introducing a new system of tournaments. Mortal Kombat is dead, but don't worry, a successor will rise from the proverbial ashes.

I am introducing something I call a G2 points system. Basically, I will award points to people who impress me, either with art, writing, or spotting things i hint at in my writing to spice it up a little http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif With G2 points, you will be able to 'buy' privelages in tournaments etc. I can keep track of everyone's points, and hope that this will bring a new and interesting gimmick to fanworks.

Back on topic, here are the major changes in the new IHTIF:
Radical rewrite - Anything you read in BFBRRR or IHTIF V.1 never happened!
Only what is stated in this IHTIF is right.
The Slash Edgewind character will take more of a back seat.
There will be far more emphasis on Del's feelings and nature.
There will be less emphasis on Falz.
New 'Hacker' character. 10 G2 points to whoever can guess who!
Del's origin and destiny will be gradually be revealed through this 'Hacker' character.

Anyway, enough of my rambling. I'll get chapter one up soon. The prologue is only from the hacker's perspective. The characters in this story talk from 10 years after the events.

Prologue

Coming soon

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Garanz2 on 2004-04-26 06:06 ]</font>


<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Garanz2 on 2004-04-27 00:08 ]</font>


<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Garanz2 on 2004-05-17 08:58 ]</font>


<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Garanz2 on 2004-05-25 05:36 ]</font>

[mr_rubbish]

I AM mr.rubbish and even I didn't see all that coming...
Total re-write?
Complete alteration of the fabric of time?
Different storyline?
10 years into the future?

And I'm sure Slash Edgewind won't be pleased... http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif

With the complete disregard for BFBRRR, does that mean I read all those chapters for nothing?
And if you change the story then my Pal Rappy short story becomes meaningless!

http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_argh.gif

Anyway...

The hacker is one of the following: Alicia, Antitank, mr.rubbish, Slash Edgewind or one of the Rappy fodder characters from BFBRRR. (But I could be wrong).

Well, it's certainly a start...
Roll on chapter 1!

[Garanz2]

Also, your Pal Rappy short is now a standalone so I don't need to take responsibility any more if people don't enjoy it http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_wacko.gif

Don't worry about BFBRRR and IHTIF. They were mostly rambling. If you liked them then...whoa. Imagine what I could do when I actually planned my story beforehand (Like I'm doing with this one) http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif

[RubyEclipse]

Good to see a new fic from garanz! Too bad everything I read previously never happened-- but oh well.

I look forward to reading more of this in the future!

Also, I have a guess or two as to the hacker-- but if I do (by some insane chance) get it right, you can give my g2 points to somebody else who wants them.

My Guess(es): Dr.Grave, Dr.Osto, Mome(I really hope it isn't mome) or maybe even Dr.Montague.

-- Ruby Eclipse

[Garanz2]

Here's a big clue to the videogame reference:

Machina

[mr_rubbish]

On 2004-04-26 14:41, Garanz2 wrote:
Here's a big clue to the videogame reference:

Machina



Deus Ex!!!!!

Give me my 20 points!

And I can't BELIEVE i forgot to list mome/montague as suspects for the hacker....

[Logical2u]

Wow, a complete rewrite of your story? You're real lucky the space/time continuum is flat. Anywho, good start, again. *Folds space*

[Garanz2]

Well done Mr_Rubbish! But, you can earn yourself a bonus 10 points if you can explain the reference to me. http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_smile.gif

I'll get chapter one up in a day or two. I'm writing fast again!

[mr_rubbish]

On 2004-04-26 14:54, Garanz2 wrote:
Well done Mr_Rubbish! But, you can earn yourself a bonus 10 points if you can explain the reference to me. http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_smile.gif


What?!? You'll have me writing the story for you next. http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_razz.gif As far as i can work out, it's the hacker's reference to having to upgrade his hacking subrountines... Keep those points coming!



Oh... and the chapters too! http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/anime2.gif

[Zzzzzz]

I expected you to change the story perspective but...
rewriting the whole thing?
WHOA!
And you're asking me to take IHTIF V.1 off my reading list?
WHOA!
G2 point system? Cool! I can see it now:




Hunter's License: $10 a month
GCN: $100
Earning enough points to win Garanz2's tournaments: Priceless
There are some things money can't buy. For Garanz2's tournaments, there are G2 points.

[BOC]

im liking what ive been reading so far.

but im stumped as to who hacker is.

but the deus ex reference was painfully obvious to me http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_wink.gif. then again it may have glanced rubbishs answer before posting and could be lying http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_razz.gif

a radical re-write. its a brave thing to do garanz, and i reckon it'll pay off.

and for u non-believers remember this: a small game developer started work on a game. once they had finished it they looked at it, deciding while it worked it could be better. they went back to the drawing board and started again. One year later the game was released. Half-life.
or i think thats how the story goes. point is garanz's fic will probably be much better this time round. not that it lacked qualiTy (with a capital T) before.

PEACE!!!

[SlashEdgewind]

.. yea, you only THINK Slash Edgewind will take a backseat, but in Del's mind, he'll PWN like NO there's no tomorrow, and he will CONTROL EVERYTHING WITH THE POWER OF HIS MIND!

Slash

[Garanz2]

http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_lol.gif Calm down Slash! How do you know that Slash even gets soul-bound with Del at all in this rewrite? Hmm?

BTW, I know that my fics are the only reason you visit PSOW any more. Bless.

[SlashEdgewind]

yea well I COULD check out other things, but the other boards *Cheaters technical q's stuff like that* don't interest me, aaaand you're the only writer I know soooo.. yea... plus I just love your fics.. they are awesome pants...

Slash

[Garanz2]

My fics are awesome pants?

[SlashEdgewind]

yes... yes they are. and Awesomepants is a good thing *although sometimes pants can be considered bad.. pants are ALWAYS IN MY WAY DAMNIT!* Awesomepants is like.. awesome.. only adding pants to it

Slash

[odie2088]

you put that quite eloquently slash...im amazed at your grace with words, its "amazingpants"

[SlashEdgewind]

heh... thank you..pants...

Slash

[Garanz2]

As you'll be able to see, I've made a lot of changes to various elements. Here's the first half of chapter one.

Also, the story has been renamed to 'The immortal feather' A simple title for once http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_smile.gif

-----

The Immortal feather - Chapter 1 - Birth of a demon

Rerouting - Attempting file access...
0011000100110011001100110011011100100001
...
...
...
...
---Come on, baby! Get in there!---
01010000010010000011001100110100010100100010000100 00110100001010
...
...
...
...
Access - granted. Welcome to your personal files, Miss Tyrell.

---Oh, yeah! Good stuff at last.---

View profile_

Rico Tyrell Personal log files
Security clearance level seven
Firewall active

Scan for unauthorised users_
01001000010000010101100001011000010011110101001001 011

01000100001
...
...
...
...
...
No unauthorised network connections detected.

01010100011000010111001101110100011001010111001100 100

00001101100011010010110101101100101001000000110001 101

1010000110100101100011011010110110010101101110
Unlimited Security clearance - granted.

---Oh man, If I wasn't afraid for my life I'd be telling myself how much of a genius I am.---

CUANet Search: 'Blackbird'_
Please stand by...
01100100011010010110011101101001011101000110000101 101

10001101001011000110110100101101111011101010111001 1
...
...
...
One match found.
Open? Y/N

Y

Rico Tyrell personal log files
Most Recent Entry - Audio only - 4 files found
Date - *Corrupted* File may be damaged or scrambled
Location of recording - Unknown

"I don't believe it. I just DON'T believe it! The government was conducting research into these freaks right under our noses! We were never told about this...this city, or the tunnel network, or the labs! Beta - 117, Operation Blackbird, the deployment of the AI cores... Oh, shit. here comes another one."

FILE END - DISCONNECTED

Playing next recording...

"Why wasn't the Hunter's guild informed? the army never stood a chance against these things! they've released somethign far beyond our control, and it's spreading. it's like these things...evolve... they grow and change to suit their environment. Those fools must have known, there must have been signs!"

FILE END - DISCONNECTED

Playing next recording...

"This may be my last message... I...I've reached the center, where those damn beasts came from in the first place. there are...computers and bodies everywhere...overgrown with this pulsing red filth... I'm hurt more than I thought. I've lost my MAG, my shield...some of my weapons and most of my survival equipment... it's our only chance... I have to destroy everything here... Pioneer Two can't be allowed to find it..."

FILE END - DISCONNECTED

Playing next recording...

"D...Dad...If you can hear me...I've...failed. I...I couldn't destroy it... If you can access this message...show it to the civilians in the...dome...and on Pioneer...Two... they deserve to... Don't let the ship land! I'll sur-"
...
...
FILE END ABRUPT - SUBJECT WND? INCAP? KIA?

---Kevin Tyrell, my boss, as it happens, never got the message. The radio waves never reached this ship. I've only found these files by hacking Rico's log entries. Normally, I'd inform Principal Tyrell immediately, but that isn't really possible right now.---

Search entire network: 'Blackbird'_
01101001011001100010000001111001011011110111010100 100

00001100011011000010110111000100111011101000010000 001

11001001100101011000010110010000100000011000100110 100

10110111001100001011100100111100100101100001000000 111

10010110111101110101001000000110010001101111011011 100

01001110111010000100000011001110110010101110100001 000

000111010001101000011010010111001100101110

Failure - unknown network prescence detected

Retry_
01100001011100100110010101101110001001110111010000 100

00001110100011010000110010101110011011001010010000 001

10100001100001011000110110101101100101011100100010 000

00111001101100101011000110111010001101001011011110 110

11100111001100100000011000010110111001101110011011 110

111100101101001011011100110011100111111

Failed

---Oh, shit. That's all I need - another hacker.---

Assigning subroutine to combat unknown presecnce - disconnecting.

I returned to my physical body with a jolt, leaving only a small auxillary program to contiinue the search. I guessed my five minutes were up. Normally, I'd get up, make sure my joints were all functioning, recharge myself slightly, then go to work. As a military android, that would mean either desk work, or peacekeeping. But, I didn't dare move. my motion sensors detected small objects, hundreds of them, all clustered around my most vital body regions - My head, torso and power cell.

Daggers. But not just normal daggers. For one thing, normal daggers need someone to hold on to them. These daggers didn't. Normally, daggers had handles. These didn't. Normally, daggers were made of steel. These weren't. Normally, I didn't have a guy in a cloak, controlling these hundreds of daggers with his mind, sitting on my sofa.

"I searched the network, Syd. I came close, but there's another hacker preventing me from digging any deeper."

Several of the jet-black dagger-like objects thudded into my upper leg.

"For now!" I added hastily. As an android, I did not feel pain as humans did. I simply registered damage. But although I felt no pain, I knew full well how much damage those blades could do. The shredded remains of everything non-vital in my apartment, including the furniture, upholstery, and majority of my electrical equipment testified to that. All that was really left was my weapon locker, half of the sofa, which 'Syd' was sitting on, and the military terminal I had been trying to hack deeper into. Everything else had been cut to ribbons, from the table to the ornaments.

Syd got to his feet, and started pacing back and forth. His footsteps didn't make the same impact as boots on carpet. "I hate this. I hate this damn city, this damn society...I hate all of you!"

"Syd...I know I'm pretty much dead whatever I do. You're very interesting and I want to know exactly what you are."

"WHAT? Why?"

"Because... I want to help you."

"FUCK YOU!"

Several more of the blades cut into my body. This time, they cut something important. my left arm went completely limp. Various damage warnings flashed across my visor, but I remained hunched over the computer terminal, not daring to move. Me, a famous hunter, held hostage by a psycho in a cloak...

"Without me, you...can't find out what you need to know..."

"You want to know what I am? I can show you what I look like, but not what I am. I am not as I was meant to be. I have never been! I WANT TO BE NORMAL!"

Several more blades contributed to my pincushion-like new look.

"Calm down...I'll do another system search."

(-----)

It was dark...because it had always been dark.
It was warm...because it had always been warm.
I was happy...because I never had any reason to be sad.
Nothing changed. The pass of time was not of my concern.

What must have been days, weeks, must have passed since I first became self-aware.
Nothing happened. I had everthing I needed. Warmth, nourishment, not a single care.
Until the day instinct took over.

Once the metaphorical spark was lit in my brain, I knew the time had come. the time to do something I had never even thought of attempting before. Something I had never wanted or needed to do. It was time to move. I did not know how, but it came naturally. the first contraction of my muscles showed me just how cramped i was. I needed more space. I could not stay here forever. It was time to break the perfect, sheltered harmony that I had outgrown.

I struggled again...Nothing.
AGAIN! Nothing...

Simply moving, which was a great effort in itself, was insufficient. I needed to devise another way out. I tried moving various muscles independantly, to little effect. I remained almost entirely restrained. I struggled and writhed as best I could, to no avail. Gradually, panic set in. I slammed my consciousness, which I now understand was my face, against the smooth wall. I didn't know why. the pain ricocheted through my body, but I did it again, not knowing that it would hurt just as much the second time. Ignoring the pain through sheer frustration, I slammed the hardest part of my face agains the surface a third time.

At once, I felt pain, elation, and confusion as I felt the heat and light of the sun on my face, my still unopened eyelids stinging with the sudden exposure. The cooling wind caressed my naked skin, and then, with a final burst of energy, I struggled free of the shell. Within a few seconds, I learned three things. The difference between light and dark, the difference betwen wet and dry, and the importance of breathing. Suddenly, I was swept up by something, and I learned two more differences. The difference between soft and hard, and heat and cold, as I was swept off the ground by something warm and fluffy.

Perfect memory...A blessing worth praising, and a curse worth damning. Yes, I remember my hatching, and the voices I heard, in sweet calming tones.

"Congratulations, Shuus-Nan. your firstborn is a healthy female."

The second voice, lacking the calmness of the other, stuttered a little. It was joyful, but underlaid with sadness.

"Kuun-Lan, I can't tell you how happy your help has made me. Phuur-Nan would be overjoyed if she were here today."

"Don't worry, I understand your concern. But let's not dwell on past mistakes. Phuur-Nan has gone on to a better place, and I am sure you have the strength to raise your young one alone. Having said that, I believe you may need a little aid..."

"What is wrong? Do you not trust me with a chick?"

"I trust you with all my heart, Shuus-Nan. But look at your young one and tell me what you see."

The warm embrace parted slightly, and I squirmed. A second gentle prescence loomed over me.

"Oh...oh, goodness!"

"She is indeed truly special, hmm?"

"She is a Khazrak!"

"And shall be treated as such. If she desires food, teaching, or aid, I will be at your service."

"Kuun-Lan, you offer your service to one as humble as me?!"

"The colouring of feathers means nothing when events as important as this occur. Look into her eyes, while they still cannot open, and touch her mind. Her name will come to you."

There was a long pause. For the while, I was content, and yawned lightly as the pain faded.

"Her name shall be...Caal."

"A good choice. For 'Caal' represents purity. Caal-Shto she shall be."

Caal-Shto...

Purity...





<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Garanz2 on 2004-05-17 06:08 ]</font>


<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Garanz2 on 2004-05-17 08:46 ]</font>


<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Garanz2 on 2004-05-25 05:37 ]</font>

[mr_rubbish]

Mutants... Psychotic telekinetic dagger-wielding nutjobs.... Android hackers.... Science gone mad... Incredibly long binary numbers... Mystery and intriege...

This fic has ALMOST everything!



PS break the numbers in half... it makes the page too wide otherwise

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: mr_rubbish on 2004-05-17 08:11 ]</font>

[Garanz2]

Thanks. Fixed the numbers.

Oh, yeah! Points questions!

For 20 G2 points, what are the hidden messages?
For 50 G2 points, can you spot both halo quotes?

[MQuantum]

Good progression, so far. This new character is quite interesting, with his 'powers' he seems to have. Definately wouldn't want to run into him in a dark alley at night. Or in a brightly colored street. Or in a highly gaurded security complex...


Unfortunately, I've never played Halo storywise, but how's my binary? I think these are what it says...


0011000100110011001100110011011100100001= 1337!

PH34R! = 01010000010010000011001100110100010100100010000100 00110100001010


HAXXOR = 01001000010000010101100001011000010011110101001001 011

01000100001 = D


01010100011000010111001101110100011001010111001100 10000001101100011010010110101101100101001000000110 001101
1010000110100101100011011010110110010101101110 = Tastes like chicken


01100100011010010110011101101001011101000110000101 101

10001101001011000110110100101101111011101010111001 1 = digitalicious


01101001011001100010000001111001011011110111010100 100

00001100011011000010110111000100111011101000010000 001

11001001100101011000010110010000100000011000100110 100

10110111001100001011100100111100100101100001000000 111

10010110111101110101001000000110010001101111011011 100

01001110111010000100000011001110110010101110100001 000

000111010001101000011010010111001100101110 = if you can't read binary, you don't get this.


01100001011100100110010101101110001001110111010000 100

00001110100011010000110010101110011011001010010000 001

10100001100001011000110110101101100101011100100010 000

00111001101100101011000110111010001101001011011110 110

11100111001100100000011000010110111001101110011011 110

111100101101001011011100110011100111111 = aren't these hacker sections annoying?



Quite a sense of humor the system has, no? http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: MQuantum on 2004-05-17 13:34 ]</font>

[Garanz2]

http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_lol.gif yup, that's right. I added those bits out of boredom. 20 points for MQuantum.

[SlashEdgewind]

..... binary.. don't.. understand.. Binary....

yay! ranzy wrote something!

Slash

[Garanz2]

All of teh chapter moved to the first chapter post




<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Garanz2 on 2004-05-25 05:37 ]</font>

[Garanz2]

And for pointXorz...

50 Points if you can identify where the names in this part came from!

[mr_rubbish]

The coming of Del Rappy!

No idea on the names though http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_frown.gif

[MQuantum]

They came from Garanz's head! Yeah, that's it! Compltetely made up, just to confuse us on the question. http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_biggrin.gif

Good awakening.

[SlashEdgewind]

they came from the aliens plotting the eventual destruction of Ragol, that or uhh... I dunno...

Slash

[BOC]

well i have no clue where you got the names from dude, but i must say this has been quite an interesting read.

i was starting to wonder though what the hell a man was doing hatching from an egg. then i realised it was a rappy. yes i am that slow.

can't wait for what comes next.

PEACE!!!

[Garanz2]

There are a lot of changes due for this chapter, and I'm gonna be adding and removing a lot of stuff during the week. This is far from a final version, but the names will remain the same to keep the question annoying http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_smile.gif

How about trying a little research guys? http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_wacko.gif

Clue: It's an expansion pack of a game by the people who made half life.


<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Garanz2 on 2004-05-23 09:14 ]</font>

[Garanz2]

Major name/gender editage! I'm also rewriting the prologue and I'm going to edit it into the first post shortly. Still more changes to come too.

[Zzzzzz]

On 2004-05-23 09:12, Garanz2 wrote:
How about trying a little research guys? http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_wacko.gif

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Garanz2 on 2004-05-23 09:14 ]</font>


*is playing Halo*
Research? Never! http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_wacko.gif

[Garanz2]

Just watch the cutscenes http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_smile.gif

[Garanz2]

I think Question time is up now http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_smile.gif

Halo quotes : "They must have known! There must have been signs!" - Cortana at the end of Assault On The Control Room.

WND? INCAP? KIA? Hard one http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_smile.gif It's the flashing text at the end of the recording from the helmet chief picks up halfway through Guilty Spark http://www.pso-world.com/psoworld/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_smile.gif

The names (Kuun-Lan, Caal-Shto) came from Homeworld's little-known expansion pack, Homeworld:Cataclysm

Work continues on prologue and chapter 2 but it's exam week at school so obviously a lot of my time is used up at the moment. I've got serious plans for ths fic and it isn't about to die any time soon. This is merely a delay, not a vain chance to prolong the inevitable.