anwserman
Jan 30, 2005, 07:41 PM
Such was my title on my MSN username.
Do note that I'm not sitting here crying while writing this.
Do note that I'm not sitting here wondering, "What the hell did I do wrong?"
Do note that I'm not sitting here wishing things were different.
Do note that I'm not wishing things were different.
Three weeks ago, give or take, I wrote a rant essentially titled, "I fucking hate you two." If you read its contents, it essentially told Mitch and Kelli to go fuck themselves and to stop being irresponsible, immature fuckers. Yet, once again I gave both of them yet another chance at friendship.
Kelli. 1. Mitch. He can burn in Hell. Really. Now he can.
This whole week has been a mess. I don't have class on either Tuesday or Thursday, so Monday night and Wednesday night Mitch and I go out drinking.
It was planned on Wednesday, however. Monday was unexpected... however, I didn't get smashed and had only the equivelent of two beers. Mitch, however, got buzzed and, blah, long story short, we were out for three hours. During that time, his girlfriend calls numerous times and then calls my cell-phone.
He begs me not to answer, and holds it against me that I shouldn't answer it because it would go against his wishes. I should have, he held our "friendship" and "bond" that we have to persuade me not to.
OK, whatever. We talked, he bitched about his girlfriend for the whole time and he said that he owed me a night to talk about nothing but me. We decided Wednesday we would do that.
Wednesday comes, and HOLY SHIT it was an awesome day. I have a profile at gay.com, and I noticed that a guy I was checking out last semester was listed on the site. I got his email address earlier in the week, and I messaged him and we talked. Long story short, I end the convo since I wanted to go to the gym, and so I get there... and he comes and SEES ME. It was awesome, and now I'm waiting for him to respond to my latest email... it took him four days or so to respond to my first one, so it might take a while to get the one I just sent him.
I was pumped, it was so cool that I actually met this good-looking guy and we talked for 20 minutes. Anyway, it was going to be good conversation material for that night. Mitch comes, and we decide that we would meet at the pool hall around 9PM.
I'm there at 9:15. He's not there. So, I end up playing pool until he shows up. At 11. However, he messaged me saying that his friend Matt called, with problems in his life and that they talked for a couple hours and shit. No big deal, we play pool until midnight and then go out and drink until 4AM.
So, we're drinking. A little backstory now, Mitch was/is cheating on his girlfriend Heidi with a girl named Margie. I've warned him for the last 3 months or so that he could not be doing that, that he needs to choose one or the other, but not both. He doesn't listen, and so Heidi gets suspicious (and also gets his cell-phone bill), gets a cell-phone number and calls Margie up in Superior where Mitch and I went clubbing before. She wonders what the hell is going on. So they talked.
We talk about my whole guy situation, but the topic ends up switching back to Mitch, Heidi and Margie. Completely drunk, Mitch says that if "he had things his way that Margie would no longer be a virgin" and that "she is probably so tight that he couldn't fit his finger"... yeah. He gets pissed that Heidi ruined his chances of getting with Margie. (note how it isn't his fault.) I say to him that it was his own fucking fault and that he's the one to blame, duh. Anyway, we have this argument/discussion about him, Margie and Heidi right before we go. We part ways at 4.
At 4:30, he calls Heidi completely drunk and pissed, yelling at her.
Next morning, I get a text-message from Heidi, wondering what the matter is with Mitch about him going out driving twice in a week, drinking, alone both times.
...Wha?
I call her, and we talk for an hour.
Basically, we find out that...
On Monday, according to what Heidi said, Mitch was drinking alone and ran into me at the Holiday gas-station for 10 minutes.
On Wednesday, he was meeting Luke at the pool-hall at 10PM and I was doing college application essays that night... I asked when she talked to him on Wednesday, and I was told between 9-10PM. Whatever happened to Matt?
He lied to us both.
Anyway, I do realize I shouldn't have done this but it is done and overwith... but I make mention to Heidi about Mitch's comments about Margie's virginity.
Heidi confronts Mitch.
Mitch confronts me.
So....
He doesn't know who I am anymore after all of this shit I've pulled.
I'm a liar.
I'm purposely trying to fuck up his life.
I'm manipulative.
I'm pulling this shit because I'm gay and because I like him.
Yup. "Get into your vehicle, back out of this driveway and get the fuck out of my life." Pondering all of the shit that he just said...
I remember exactly what he said that night. I shouldn't have said it but I wouldn't have fabricated it just to fuck up his life, and among other things, three other people's lives (including my own.)
I confront him on Friday, and basically tells me that he's sick of my shit, that I need to get out of his fucking personal life (yet, he's the one who bitches to me when its convenient for him) and that "he can't breathe." Yeah, because he's fucking irresponsible and because.. I try to keep himself to his own word.
Analyzing what he all said to me.. people know how good I've treated him. People know my word. People know I wouldn't fuck around like that, and people know that I wouldn't manipulate or fuck around with people's lives because I'm, by my own words, queer. Especially with a straight guy.
So. He has issues. Serious fucking issues. He said that he would never say anything like what I said he said... except for the fact that he thinks she's fucking gorgeous, that he's made out with her and they've dry humped each other. Plus, if he doesn't remember saying that, it means he blacked out and thus has issues with alcohol (which he actually does.) Now, instead of actually thinking that he might have said that, he assumes that I'm a fucking liar. He's been around me enough to know that I wouldn't pull shit like that. I have been there time and time again to help him succeed, and never wanting him to fail. I gave up my last package of cigs 2-3 weeks ago off of him saying that he wanted to quit smoking... I didn't want to be an influence on him. If he does remember saying that he wants to be Margie's virginity taker, signifies that he's lying to save face and that he cannot accept responsibility for his own actions.
Basically... he's a mixture/combination of...
1) Alcoholic
2) Compulsive Liar
3) Person who cannot take responsibility for his actions
Now, a friend would be there to help somebody if they admit that they have a problem. If Mitch came and apologized to not just me for being a fucking ass... and admitted he had a problem.. I'd do my best to help him. But no. He's not admitting he has a problem, he's denying responsibility for his actions and he's telling me to fuck off.
What a fucking loser.
Ian, you were right.
Do note that I'm not sitting here crying while writing this.
Do note that I'm not sitting here wondering, "What the hell did I do wrong?"
Do note that I'm not sitting here wishing things were different.
Do note that I'm not wishing things were different.
Three weeks ago, give or take, I wrote a rant essentially titled, "I fucking hate you two." If you read its contents, it essentially told Mitch and Kelli to go fuck themselves and to stop being irresponsible, immature fuckers. Yet, once again I gave both of them yet another chance at friendship.
Kelli. 1. Mitch. He can burn in Hell. Really. Now he can.
This whole week has been a mess. I don't have class on either Tuesday or Thursday, so Monday night and Wednesday night Mitch and I go out drinking.
It was planned on Wednesday, however. Monday was unexpected... however, I didn't get smashed and had only the equivelent of two beers. Mitch, however, got buzzed and, blah, long story short, we were out for three hours. During that time, his girlfriend calls numerous times and then calls my cell-phone.
He begs me not to answer, and holds it against me that I shouldn't answer it because it would go against his wishes. I should have, he held our "friendship" and "bond" that we have to persuade me not to.
OK, whatever. We talked, he bitched about his girlfriend for the whole time and he said that he owed me a night to talk about nothing but me. We decided Wednesday we would do that.
Wednesday comes, and HOLY SHIT it was an awesome day. I have a profile at gay.com, and I noticed that a guy I was checking out last semester was listed on the site. I got his email address earlier in the week, and I messaged him and we talked. Long story short, I end the convo since I wanted to go to the gym, and so I get there... and he comes and SEES ME. It was awesome, and now I'm waiting for him to respond to my latest email... it took him four days or so to respond to my first one, so it might take a while to get the one I just sent him.
I was pumped, it was so cool that I actually met this good-looking guy and we talked for 20 minutes. Anyway, it was going to be good conversation material for that night. Mitch comes, and we decide that we would meet at the pool hall around 9PM.
I'm there at 9:15. He's not there. So, I end up playing pool until he shows up. At 11. However, he messaged me saying that his friend Matt called, with problems in his life and that they talked for a couple hours and shit. No big deal, we play pool until midnight and then go out and drink until 4AM.
So, we're drinking. A little backstory now, Mitch was/is cheating on his girlfriend Heidi with a girl named Margie. I've warned him for the last 3 months or so that he could not be doing that, that he needs to choose one or the other, but not both. He doesn't listen, and so Heidi gets suspicious (and also gets his cell-phone bill), gets a cell-phone number and calls Margie up in Superior where Mitch and I went clubbing before. She wonders what the hell is going on. So they talked.
We talk about my whole guy situation, but the topic ends up switching back to Mitch, Heidi and Margie. Completely drunk, Mitch says that if "he had things his way that Margie would no longer be a virgin" and that "she is probably so tight that he couldn't fit his finger"... yeah. He gets pissed that Heidi ruined his chances of getting with Margie. (note how it isn't his fault.) I say to him that it was his own fucking fault and that he's the one to blame, duh. Anyway, we have this argument/discussion about him, Margie and Heidi right before we go. We part ways at 4.
At 4:30, he calls Heidi completely drunk and pissed, yelling at her.
Next morning, I get a text-message from Heidi, wondering what the matter is with Mitch about him going out driving twice in a week, drinking, alone both times.
...Wha?
I call her, and we talk for an hour.
Basically, we find out that...
On Monday, according to what Heidi said, Mitch was drinking alone and ran into me at the Holiday gas-station for 10 minutes.
On Wednesday, he was meeting Luke at the pool-hall at 10PM and I was doing college application essays that night... I asked when she talked to him on Wednesday, and I was told between 9-10PM. Whatever happened to Matt?
He lied to us both.
Anyway, I do realize I shouldn't have done this but it is done and overwith... but I make mention to Heidi about Mitch's comments about Margie's virginity.
Heidi confronts Mitch.
Mitch confronts me.
So....
He doesn't know who I am anymore after all of this shit I've pulled.
I'm a liar.
I'm purposely trying to fuck up his life.
I'm manipulative.
I'm pulling this shit because I'm gay and because I like him.
Yup. "Get into your vehicle, back out of this driveway and get the fuck out of my life." Pondering all of the shit that he just said...
I remember exactly what he said that night. I shouldn't have said it but I wouldn't have fabricated it just to fuck up his life, and among other things, three other people's lives (including my own.)
I confront him on Friday, and basically tells me that he's sick of my shit, that I need to get out of his fucking personal life (yet, he's the one who bitches to me when its convenient for him) and that "he can't breathe." Yeah, because he's fucking irresponsible and because.. I try to keep himself to his own word.
Analyzing what he all said to me.. people know how good I've treated him. People know my word. People know I wouldn't fuck around like that, and people know that I wouldn't manipulate or fuck around with people's lives because I'm, by my own words, queer. Especially with a straight guy.
So. He has issues. Serious fucking issues. He said that he would never say anything like what I said he said... except for the fact that he thinks she's fucking gorgeous, that he's made out with her and they've dry humped each other. Plus, if he doesn't remember saying that, it means he blacked out and thus has issues with alcohol (which he actually does.) Now, instead of actually thinking that he might have said that, he assumes that I'm a fucking liar. He's been around me enough to know that I wouldn't pull shit like that. I have been there time and time again to help him succeed, and never wanting him to fail. I gave up my last package of cigs 2-3 weeks ago off of him saying that he wanted to quit smoking... I didn't want to be an influence on him. If he does remember saying that he wants to be Margie's virginity taker, signifies that he's lying to save face and that he cannot accept responsibility for his own actions.
Basically... he's a mixture/combination of...
1) Alcoholic
2) Compulsive Liar
3) Person who cannot take responsibility for his actions
Now, a friend would be there to help somebody if they admit that they have a problem. If Mitch came and apologized to not just me for being a fucking ass... and admitted he had a problem.. I'd do my best to help him. But no. He's not admitting he has a problem, he's denying responsibility for his actions and he's telling me to fuck off.
What a fucking loser.
Ian, you were right.