HAYABUSA-FMW-
Feb 27, 2005, 06:36 AM
Well I've been holding this in for quite some time and it has bothered me to no end. It boils down really to my own incompetence and holding a grudge. It can be further viewed as just plain insecurities and lack of social skills.
My whole life I've had a different group of friends every few years. It has been weird. People mature and move on. Yeah, part of life. I have a problem with this though. I feel excluded and left in the past everytime. The more I open up, the more I put myself in a position to be excluded and left in their dust.
High School in particular was a terrible time for me. The people I considered friends would not, and did not give me a reason to, be around me anymore. Peers my own age. I considered them as individuals with the same kind of interests as I did.
This was wrong. I just tried to fit in and stood out like a sore thumb, probably. I was always the fifth wheel, someone of no importance and a train car that could be let go.
I ended up hanging out with Freshman kids whilst I was a Senior. You don't want to know how fun that was. http://pso-world.com/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_frown.gif A few were siblings of my previous friends who were Senior classmen as well.
I again stood out and looked crazy by doing this. The year ended and I continued to try to hang out with these younger folk. They are still in school and I have a job. We used to find time to hang out and do things. I don't drive a car and this shows some similarity of interest and accomplishment to them.
I can't escape the prying questions of why I don't drive a car at my age(19) though.
They talk about stuff I don't care about or have no reason to. Example being 14 year old freshmen girls at school, or some teacher they don't like, or how they didn't pass their math test and have to be scolded by their parents.
I always passed my tests. I wasn't a below average student by any means. I can't relate to that, or having crushes on barely teenage girls. They are spoiled to no end by their parents when I had to work hard in school and only get a $2 a day allowance for lunch. The average lunch was about $2.50. More fun.
They always pulled some crappy jokes outta their bastard minds to put me down. Most times I would laugh along and just enjoy spending time with them. I didn't at any time make jokes about them right to their face and laugh at them to put them on the spot.
Sometimes I would be extremely angered by such behavior and let it out.
There is no reason for them to be hypocritical about menial things like pronounciation of words in another language, other than ignorance and plain immaturity. They did so and were prejudiced towards me for this. I didn't like that but didn't say anything like that if they badly mispronounced something in Japanese in front of me.
"The last straw" so to speak came when they called me to attend a movie with them. I was glad they invited me I and was looking forward to it. I waited 2 hours+ for them to meet up and they never did. Upon me calling them back several times, they said they were "Coming and almost there," then later "Oh we're at some church thing."
I asked directly:
"Why are you there if we were supposed to meet up?"
"Can you see if Shaun of the dead is playing?"
"No. Answer my question."
*talking directly into the phone but to another of the people in question in front of him*
"He won't check for us."
"Hello! I'm not your servant to go wait in the cold for 2 hours and check on some movie time for you! You can call the movie theater yourself, that's what I do if I want to know if something is playing! Forget it, its too late now."
*again to friend and not to me*
"He says he doesn't want to anymore, its too late."
*person in background*
"Wait wait tell him to wait we're almost done here."
Click.
Bitches.
They come into my workplace every so often now with a group of more rich kids who I've never seen before, and don't really care about, and spend their parents money and stare at me. I ignore them. Why would I want to look at you spoiled brats wearing $300 worth of shit your mom bought you for no good reason?!
They came in on Friday and told a cashier up front they wanted to say "Hi."
Fuck no.
Its been 6 months. Its too damn late for "Hi, lets go hang out," don't you think?
Its damn near past overdue for "We're sorry. It won't happen again."
You have my number you can call on your cell phone your parents provided for you. Oh that's right, when I called you before, I was "wasting your minutes." You don't even pay for them, sucker! You don't even know how to call the damn movie theater ahead of time either.
Hang out with those rich punks you bring in with you some more.
I always tried to be generous about birthdays and Christmas and shit but the favors were never returned.
Thanks for nothing. Oh wait, thanks for wasting a few years of my life. Stop coming into my workplace and making me look like the bad guy, or at fault. If you're not going to apologize, I have nothing to say to you anymore.
My whole life I've had a different group of friends every few years. It has been weird. People mature and move on. Yeah, part of life. I have a problem with this though. I feel excluded and left in the past everytime. The more I open up, the more I put myself in a position to be excluded and left in their dust.
High School in particular was a terrible time for me. The people I considered friends would not, and did not give me a reason to, be around me anymore. Peers my own age. I considered them as individuals with the same kind of interests as I did.
This was wrong. I just tried to fit in and stood out like a sore thumb, probably. I was always the fifth wheel, someone of no importance and a train car that could be let go.
I ended up hanging out with Freshman kids whilst I was a Senior. You don't want to know how fun that was. http://pso-world.com/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_frown.gif A few were siblings of my previous friends who were Senior classmen as well.
I again stood out and looked crazy by doing this. The year ended and I continued to try to hang out with these younger folk. They are still in school and I have a job. We used to find time to hang out and do things. I don't drive a car and this shows some similarity of interest and accomplishment to them.
I can't escape the prying questions of why I don't drive a car at my age(19) though.
They talk about stuff I don't care about or have no reason to. Example being 14 year old freshmen girls at school, or some teacher they don't like, or how they didn't pass their math test and have to be scolded by their parents.
I always passed my tests. I wasn't a below average student by any means. I can't relate to that, or having crushes on barely teenage girls. They are spoiled to no end by their parents when I had to work hard in school and only get a $2 a day allowance for lunch. The average lunch was about $2.50. More fun.
They always pulled some crappy jokes outta their bastard minds to put me down. Most times I would laugh along and just enjoy spending time with them. I didn't at any time make jokes about them right to their face and laugh at them to put them on the spot.
Sometimes I would be extremely angered by such behavior and let it out.
There is no reason for them to be hypocritical about menial things like pronounciation of words in another language, other than ignorance and plain immaturity. They did so and were prejudiced towards me for this. I didn't like that but didn't say anything like that if they badly mispronounced something in Japanese in front of me.
"The last straw" so to speak came when they called me to attend a movie with them. I was glad they invited me I and was looking forward to it. I waited 2 hours+ for them to meet up and they never did. Upon me calling them back several times, they said they were "Coming and almost there," then later "Oh we're at some church thing."
I asked directly:
"Why are you there if we were supposed to meet up?"
"Can you see if Shaun of the dead is playing?"
"No. Answer my question."
*talking directly into the phone but to another of the people in question in front of him*
"He won't check for us."
"Hello! I'm not your servant to go wait in the cold for 2 hours and check on some movie time for you! You can call the movie theater yourself, that's what I do if I want to know if something is playing! Forget it, its too late now."
*again to friend and not to me*
"He says he doesn't want to anymore, its too late."
*person in background*
"Wait wait tell him to wait we're almost done here."
Click.
Bitches.
They come into my workplace every so often now with a group of more rich kids who I've never seen before, and don't really care about, and spend their parents money and stare at me. I ignore them. Why would I want to look at you spoiled brats wearing $300 worth of shit your mom bought you for no good reason?!
They came in on Friday and told a cashier up front they wanted to say "Hi."
Fuck no.
Its been 6 months. Its too damn late for "Hi, lets go hang out," don't you think?
Its damn near past overdue for "We're sorry. It won't happen again."
You have my number you can call on your cell phone your parents provided for you. Oh that's right, when I called you before, I was "wasting your minutes." You don't even pay for them, sucker! You don't even know how to call the damn movie theater ahead of time either.
Hang out with those rich punks you bring in with you some more.
I always tried to be generous about birthdays and Christmas and shit but the favors were never returned.
Thanks for nothing. Oh wait, thanks for wasting a few years of my life. Stop coming into my workplace and making me look like the bad guy, or at fault. If you're not going to apologize, I have nothing to say to you anymore.