Kids can be really cruel

[navci]

So. Some of you might know that I volunteer in a school. I go there every week and spend an hour with a girl name.. well let's call her Katie. She is 12, in Grade 7.

Anyway. I went there today, and apparently Katie twisted her ankle and need crutches to walk. She was quite upset because well, aside from the fact it hurts. People in her class that she thought was her "friends" are also giving her a hard time. Some of them were laughing at her, some trying to steal their crutches, some knock over stuff and make her pick it up. Correction, all of them was done by one tall, blonde girl who is extremely popular in class. And the others just follow.

Understandably, Katie is quite upset. I think she was on the verge of crying quite a few times. I didn't know how to make her feel better. All I can do was saying that it is indeed a mean thing to do, they are probably not worth upsetting over. Blah blah blah, I listened to myself and know I am talking cliche. I wish there is something I can do to help her, like, beat those kid up, break their leg, .. you know, that kinda thing. Unfortunately, there isn't anything that I can do, legally.

Argh. Kids can be really cruel. They, need to be subjected to the kinda things they subject others to. Maybe then they will learn.

[ForceOfBrokenGlass]

That's middle school for ya. Realizing my peers were useless petty fools was one of the things that kept me sane then.

[tai_EX]

this is understood by all modern or not so modern people everywhere... the cruel world of the 7th grade girl... this is a sad world to be in if you are 12, in 7th grade, and are a girl which surprisingly is a large amount of the 7th grade population...


CURSE THE POPULAR AND THE BLONDE!! RABLE RABLE RABBLE! http://pso-world.com/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_argh.gif

[Dek]

Well I'm sure you know that this HAD to be the next question to be asked...

Does the teacher do anything about the situation?

[Nohra]

You could always tell the principal, though that might start some more bullshit with the students calling her a wimp. :< Bullies need to die. u.u

[navci]

On 2005-06-14 15:07, Nohra wrote:
You could always tell the principal, though that might start some more bullshit with the students calling her a wimp. :< Bullies need to die. u.u



Exactly. I am not sure the teacher is where I want to go to. I mean, I don't want them to be following her around and kick bully's ass cuz that will single her out.

And, if you have been a kid you'd know. The teachers don't always notice that you are doing something non-nice. The class is big, their attention can only go so far.

[HAYABUSA-FMW-]

Confront the bullying girl about it.
Set up a mediation with the teacher as well.

Even though Katie should be able to get over it, its something people don't need to see going on.

Phone call home to the bullying girl's parents might happen, among other things.

Hmm. A kid stole a cell phone from my little brother and ran off with it. The phone was used for a survey and class leadership project.

The kid comes to school later in the week and tells my brother: "You got me put in jail, but its cool." Then he proceeds to get into a fight the same day.

I told my brother: "No! You didn't get anyone put in jail. He did it to himself, he stole your property. Way to take responsibility this guy! Look how he just continued to do bad things. Talk to your leadership teacher about it to settle down the situation and get some credit for your work."

[Daikarin]

You need to call Shaft.

Seriously, kids are too dumb at that age to know what being mature is all about. I'm sure Katie will grow stronger with all that.

When I was around 12-14, I used to hang around the 6-year old area, waiting for my mom to finish work, and pick me up. I got to see a lot of lonely kids, and they all had the same problem: Self-pity. Teach Katie to enjoy life, even when it throws ugly stuff at you. It's ok to be carefree and living without worries.

Just the fact that you're there will make her realize this eventually.

[Sagasu]

Being put into a complex of buildings with hundreds of your peers for half of your waking hours is not for those who lack the ability to take care of themselves. Which is why it is absolute madness today.

If she doesnt seek an alternative solution, she'll just have to wait out the years of abuse. Does terrible things to your self esteem ,_,

[Ness]

Tell Katie this:

Who care about what they say to you? If they don't like you for who you are they can go to hell. Also tell her to tell them how sad it is that they have fun picking on a wounded person.

[HAYABUSA-FMW-]

On 2005-06-14 17:07, Sagasu wrote:
Being put into a complex of buildings with hundreds of your peers for half of your waking hours is not for those who lack the ability to take care of themselves. Which is why it is absolute madness today.


Indeed.
A lot of schools can be just looked at as babysitters with books. No one needs to learn, and just to get them out of the streets and out of trouble.

I always hated how some students in class would immediately make scenes and distract minutes from the time we needed to get things done, for thier own selfish reasons.

Sometimes teachers would be almost helpless. They could send the student out of class, to the principal's office, but there would be a chance the student would just take it as a free pass to go and mess around outside of class-and not go to the office.

The student would be caught and say they weren't able to learn since the teacher kicked them out of class. They failed to mention that their bad behavior causes them to be removed from class.

Some people don't get it.

However I'm a "negative Nancy type."
Smoke bombs, sexual harassment charges, physical abuse charges, etc. have been a part of my 4 years in High School.

Also a classmate of mine was expelled from school for pulling fire alarms numerous times in a row. Last month he committed armed robbery and one of his group of criminals was shot dead.

The world is terrible sometimes.
Sorry for derailing the topic.

[CupOfCoffee]

So you were there when it happened? As in you actually witnessed the blonde girl messing with Katie? If so, then the next time Blondie starts her routine, just look at her in the eye and say, "What the hell are you doing?" Then maintain eye contact until she weirds out. Kids in 7th grade are big sissies, and will cower in fear at the sight of a high schooler asking them what the hell and then giving them a good stare to go along with it. Trust me, I've done it lots of times before, and it's great.

One time I saw some kids screwing with my brother over the exact same thing (crutches). One of them was like, "Hey, what would you do if I took one of your crutches!?" so I walked up and said, "Hey, what would you do if I took one of your fingers?" Not only was it hilarious to me, but the kids then left my brother alone.

Of course, this is only a temporary solution, because you're basically giving Katie a fish instead of teaching her to fish for herself. But still, it might work well enough to deter Blondie until Katie's crutches are gone.

[KodiaX987]

On 2005-06-14 17:27, Ness wrote:
Tell Katie this:

Who care about what they say to you? If they don't like you for who you are they can go to hell. Also tell her to tell them how sad it is that they have fun picking on a wounded person.



This strategy = fail. Usually, bullies who realize their words won't get to you will start smacking you around instead.

[ForceOfBrokenGlass]

On 2005-06-14 18:36, KodiaX987 wrote:


On 2005-06-14 17:27, Ness wrote:
Tell Katie this:

Who care about what they say to you? If they don't like you for who you are they can go to hell. Also tell her to tell them how sad it is that they have fun picking on a wounded person.



This strategy = fail. Usually, bullies who realize their words won't get to you will start smacking you around instead.



Bullies also bring their bully friends in on it to make you pay if you snitch.

[Ness]

On 2005-06-14 18:36, KodiaX987 wrote:


On 2005-06-14 17:27, Ness wrote:
Tell Katie this:

Who care about what they say to you? If they don't like you for who you are they can go to hell. Also tell her to tell them how sad it is that they have fun picking on a wounded person.



This strategy = fail. Usually, bullies who realize their words won't get to you will start smacking you around instead.



It always worked for me.

[navci]

This is part of what is frustrating as well. As the volunteer that I am, I have very limited access and ability to intervene. It is also this limitation that makes anything being done by me close to impossible. All I can really offer is support and some positive thinking. It pisses me off sometimes on how little I can do for her too.

I am not asking for advice here. Mostly just ranting about the inability to do things. :/

[Sayara]

On 2005-06-14 19:30, Ness wrote:


On 2005-06-14 18:36, KodiaX987 wrote:


On 2005-06-14 17:27, Ness wrote:
Tell Katie this:

Who care about what they say to you? If they don't like you for who you are they can go to hell. Also tell her to tell them how sad it is that they have fun picking on a wounded person.



This strategy = fail. Usually, bullies who realize their words won't get to you will start smacking you around instead.



It always worked for me.


Too bad not everyone has the personallity of Ness.

[RoninJoku]

Omg I effing HATE middle school kids! >.< Not only did I get a whole lot of shit in middle school... But I can remember so many instances where I caused pain to people around me because of my stupid actions... God dammit! I'm so sorry ~insert name here~ ... Sorry I turned my back on you and was such an asshole... I didn't realize I could be causing so much pain... *sigh*

[Sayara]

And for you nabi, while Jin is right and letting her deal with her problems, you could at the least support her and if this keeps at it perhaps get some attnetion pointed to it.

Even if its the not perfect ending.
Age 12 anyone is super unstable time.

[Ness]

On 2005-06-14 20:43, Tingle wrote:


On 2005-06-14 19:30, Ness wrote:


On 2005-06-14 18:36, KodiaX987 wrote:


On 2005-06-14 17:27, Ness wrote:
Tell Katie this:

Who care about what they say to you? If they don't like you for who you are they can go to hell. Also tell her to tell them how sad it is that they have fun picking on a wounded person.



This strategy = fail. Usually, bullies who realize their words won't get to you will start smacking you around instead.



It always worked for me.


Too bad not everyone has the personallity of Ness.



I'm not the only one that strategy has worked for.

[Sayara]

On 2005-06-15 04:57, Ness wrote:
I'm not the only one that strategy has worked for.


I say that because not everyone is as confident in themselves as you are anyone who had that action successful.

I mean, like i said, 12 year olds are unstable, some could be already low in confidence, or way to psyched out for your method to work.

[Ness]

On 2005-06-15 06:29, Tingle wrote:


On 2005-06-15 04:57, Ness wrote:
I'm not the only one that strategy has worked for.


I say that because not everyone is as confident in themselves as you are anyone who had that action successful.

I mean, like i said, 12 year olds are unstable, some could be already low in confidence, or way to psyched out for your method to work.



I have to agree with you there. When you're 12, you care about what people think and that's can be your downfall. Even I was guilty of this, but after 7th grade I just stopped caring and people stop screwing with me.

[Jett_Kakashi]

If I was there, I would walked up to that Blondie, and just said "Sit your a** down now! Or go back to f***ing elementary school you stupid prep!"
Or wouldve done the yell and stare at her thing.
I have one ear, so my Junior High School days were ptretty rough. I was an exile. Now, people in High School thinks Im one of the coolest people out there..cuz I just dont give a two sh**s about what people say. Ussually I just say "Who gives a crap if I have one ear. Means I can sleep better at night. Right?"

[tetujin]

One day I messed up my ankle on my bike, but I didn't sprain or break it, so I could go to school. I got excuse from P.E. and blah blah blah. This one kid who is one of the many who look down on me because of my "big-head" >_> (it's actually the same size as the most popular boy in school, WTF?) Kicked me in the ankle. May I notify you that he is the lead soccer player. I fell hard, and even my "best friends" laughed at me.


Life will suck, but it wil get better.......eventually

[Genoa]

Megid them?.... 0_o
But seriously, that's pretty low... maybe someday that blond gurl will grow up and realize she was a complete ass when she was younger and she'll feel bad about it for a long time... but maybe not >_>

I can't stand most middle school kids... they're trying to be mature, cool, and popular all at the same time... but fail miserably. And again, I said most not all... but yeah, Tell Katie we're sorry for her eh?

[booRAD]

well, its not a guy bully. u cant go about a situation as bluntly as u could with them. its a girl, which is a completely different category. the last thing u want to do is to try to talk sense to them. girls in middleschool are all insecure as it is, so they are easily swayed. reputation is everything, so u must violate it. do something to the popular girl to make her feel embarrassed. or if u want to get them good, see if u have friends with little brothers around 15-16 years old, because girls that are in 7th grade will immediately think the guys are hott just because they are older and talking to them. have them come into the school one day, laugh at the popular girl because shes so ugly, and have them hit on all of her friends and hang out with them. support starts to weaken for the one popular girl ... it works every time. and since the friends will take a liking to the older boys, when the popular girl tries talking shit about them to build herself back up, her girlfriends arent going to listen, because they will think that they are above her. then the popular girl knows shes fucked cuz her followers ditched her because cooler ppl said that shes worthless.


thats probably near impossible to pull off tho, seeing as no 15 year old guys would want to help out a teacher and go that far out of their way. but the divine plan always worked in highschool when u had a core group of friends and wanted to weed out a single bad apple from the opposite sex