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Rei-San
Feb 7, 2006, 08:56 PM
I finally desided to write my own
fan fic. I was able to write an epilouge for my series.





Phantasy Star Unlimited


Epilogue:



Games are things in which people try to get together and have a little friendly competition, or in which they have fun just to come together and chat. Whether if they are in video games or in real life. Then, People decided to combine the two in a revolutionary way. This is an example leading to a new game made called Phantasy Star.

Phantasy Star is a popular online game that is sweeping the nation. In this game, players can gather together to chat and go on quests and adventures via virtual reality. This game has a high amount of popularity, but it’s not perfect. There are some players in the game that ruins everything. These players are called hackers. These are players that cheat to make themselves stronger or to ruin the fun for everyone by corrupting innocent players. But there’s one group who plans to wreck the game and make it theirs.

“So, how are things coming?” One boy asked the other. “Not quite there yet.” He answered. “Almost done, but we can still do some damage with what we have.” “Good.” He replied. Then he turned to the female of the group. “Are all the systems up?” He asked her. “All systems are up, we can start now.” She responds. One of the guys had a disapproving feeling about the whole idea. “Aren’t you afraid that we’ll get caught?” He asked. “We’ll get in big trouble if we do.” Then, with a sure look on his face, he responds, “Nah, We did our homework didn’t we? We’ll be fine.” They then started their plan. The turned on the game, Put on their VR Visors, and started the game. “Let operation Digital Nightmare begin!”

And so they began their plan to take over the game. They think there’s nothing anyone can do. Their evil program hacked its way into the game. All hope seems lost. But, there is one party of players who can stop them……



Tell me what you think. I'll try to make the other chapters. It might take a while since I can't get to my computers most of the time.


<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: RayMaster on 2006-02-07 18:05 ]</font>

EphekZ
Feb 7, 2006, 09:12 PM
umm sounds more like a prologue...but ok?

anyways sounds like .hack Ill keep reading along.

Dre_o
Feb 7, 2006, 09:32 PM
On 2006-02-07 18:12, darkgunner wrote:
umm sounds more like a prologue...but ok?

anyways sounds like .hack Ill keep reading along.


THAT'S what it reminded me of! Yes indeedee. But I too, will continue reading.

Rei-San
Feb 7, 2006, 09:36 PM
Great, I'm glad you like it. I'll make a new one soon.

KaFKa
Feb 8, 2006, 12:25 AM
Well, great fic now that its over, what will be your follow-up?

Sarcasm aside, you need to slow down when typing out your fics, there is little to no detail. At all. The idea is great, and has a lot of potential, but you really need to SLOW DOWN. It isn't a race to push out chapters or any of that, just take your time and let the story flow naturally. Because this prolouge seems forced with no flow to it whatsoever.

You need to remember, that although you should be writing for yourself, things need to be conveyed to the reader that has no idea of what's going on.