Quitting seems so simple.

[Jive18]

Alright, here's a long story cut short:

So we reached the end of the year and had a few meetings/announcements about marching band section leaders for next year, the one part of band I truly care about. For alto saxaphones there were 3 people auditioning for the two spots; my friend, some girl, and myself. It took a while, but I just heard that the other two made it, leaving me empty.

Not only does this mean I've been demoted from my spot last year (I was section leader as a junior), but it also means that I now have to take shit from the girl that replaced me. Apparently my director favors her, this is just another title she has been given over me within the last two years.

I'm not going to lie - I'm being completly selfish right now. But you have to understand my point of view. I've taken so much fucking shit and worked so hard in band over the last three years that not getting this makes me feel like my director hasn't recognized my abilities and contributions whatsoever. I feel like I can't help the band near as much now; being a section leader obviously gives you the ability to reach and influence more people.

I can't get over this no matter what I do. I keep trying to tell myself it will be better and easier this way, but it won't. My past experiences mean very little now, and it seems that there is nothing left for me in band, except my friends (most of whom are section leaders).

How can I get past this without just giving up? In many ways band has been more important to me than even school, and being stabbed in the back like this is just miserable. I refuse to stay in band if I'm going to continue to feel so much animosoty (sp?) towards my director and others. Afterall, band was only supposed to be fun, not give me all this grief.

Whatever my decision is, I have to make it soon. I have so many other things I need to start working on, mostly college related, and this band-dilemma is consuming me now. Band meant so much to me, and suddenly I don't feel the same about it anymore.



<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Jive18 on 2006-06-17 21:56 ]</font>

[jkrox4eva]

hm i understand.. i tried playing in band in 6'th grade... quit halfway through the year. my teacher was a friggin crazy ass guy. lol

[Charmander02]

Keep working hard, your director will eventually notice your skills.

[InfinityXXX]

Jive, your not being selfish, I KNOW EXACTLY what you are going through.

Me and my best friend are Juniors (going on Seniors next year) along with our band friends. And I went through a similar situation like you. Basically, as you said, most of your band friends do be section leaders especially when your entering your upper class years.

What had happened with me, was that I had gave myself an ultimatum, If I didn't become Drum Major I would quit the band since I could not take orders under the people that were trying out since they cheated their to their positions(Their Parents). My friend also made an ultimatum too, saying if he did not become section leader of the Trumpets, he would quit since he was up against freshman. Luckily, I became Drum Major but my friend had lost his position to a freshman.(He lost because of his poor sight reading) And he was pissed.

Its not that people are being selfish, its just that, when you get and hold a position for so long and lose out to some newcomer, its hard to take.

My only advice, is to be like my friend and take up another instrument so you can get into another section.

I'm sorry and I hope it all works out some how.

[Getintothegame]

Agh, it's unfair. Trust me, teachers do have favorites and there is really nothing you can do about it. Just show that you are better and people will notice- eventually people will know that he favors her and that you should be picked.

That will really only work if it's more of a democracy in your class. But I know what you're going through. Chorus is just the same way - solos go to the favorites. Even if they suck at them and other people are amazing with them.

[Nai_Calus]

Ugh, having to take Chorus when I had to switch schools during senior year because of moving made me hate singing. Backstabbing bitches.

And yup, teacher had pets. Solos went to her pets.

OK, we did that disgusting bastardized version of Joyful, Joyful from Sister Act 2. Nevermind that it's a bunch of white middle-class southern kids who wouldn't know how to sing like that if their lives depended on it. Well, it starts with that solo that Lauryn fricking Hill does. It's split in half and given to the TWO MOST CLASSICALLY TRAINED GIRLS IN THE FUCKING CLASS, the ones who can barely do BROADWAY because they're so fucking stuck in opera mode. Neither of them would know soul if it jumped up their asses. One we never even heard audition for the part.

I got my comeuppance, though. Twice. Once when nearly the entire class(not all at once, mind you) told me privately later that I should have been the one to get it(I CAN sing like that, and quite well.) The second time was when me and Teacher's Pet #1 were singing seperately at the baccalaureate(We were both seniors, so both graduating). I sang before her. Did Bette Midler's 'Wind Beneath my Wings', which I kick ass at(Oh, my computer died before I was able to get my backing track burned, boyfriend at the time found a karaoke version online for me and mailed it, but it was shortened and didn't have the ending, so I just did it acapella and nobody even noticed that I didn't tell unless they really knew the song and were paying attention. XP). Got a standing ovation, the first anyone at the school had seen anyone get. TP#1 goes. Does Whitney Houston's 'Greatest Love of All'. Sounds awful, she can't DO Whitney. Polite clapping. I so fucking won. (Made up for teacher bitch giving me a fucking C. Excuse me? I did your shitty little assignments, moreso than your fucking pets. I put up with your crap. You, ma'am, suck shit. But even you shut up about it when I had to audition acapella because I couldn't hear morning announcements over annoying freshmen and still nailed my fucking song to a WALL, didn't you?)

...My point with this rambling being. Do what you do best. Nail everything. Own the hell out of the favorites. The teacher will be eternally blind, but anyone whose opinion is actually worth something will notice. Your fellow students will recognize, and they will end up on your side. Fuck the teacher. Just be yourself and shine. Nevermind the titles. Just own and enjoy the little victories.

[FOAtHeart]

If you love playing your instrument, does your placement in the band matter? http://www.pso-world.com/images/phpbb/icons/smiles/icon_confused.gif


I have been in similar situations but I never got mad about it. I just practiced harder.

[Jive18]

Of course I do, otherwise I would've quit sometime ago. Marching/field show is different though. It's so much more than "just playing".

Anyway, thanks to everybody so far. I guess for now I'll stick with it (very grudgingly) and just try and get through this last year as fast as possible.