SabZero
De Rol Le phobic

Surprising development!

The area that "caught" fire was eucalyptus trees! It caught fire exactly a year ago, too (the mayor found that fact "intriguing")!

In case you don't know about eucalyptus, they actually want fires to start, to extinguish the competition. Why the fuck are they allowed to spread? Beats me. There are laws that say you need express permission to plant eucalyptus trees in Portugal, but there is no effort whatsoever to control the wild spreading. So there.
The soils are all turning into sand, but that's great, because it's like the beach!
Ground water levels fall, but who needs that!
More forest fires, but that's just dirt anyway! (yes, any piece of land with vegetation on it is called dirty)

Newstime!

New suggested name for Portugal: Fucktugal or Portufuck

News #1 - The beach crumbles and kills (not all) humans! LINK with picture
So these beach lovers lie in the shade of an isolated sandstone pillar. It falls on them. They ded! Oh yeah, there *was* a plaque warning of danger on that particular beach. I guess that's why that clan was alone there, and only four dead, two in hospital.

News #2 - FIAHA. About time too, I guess the arsenist waited for a windy day.
Surprise, it's in the golf club/luxury condo. Every time they want to build some more "luxury" apartment buildings, something's gotta burn! This time, a little area with trees on the other side of the cemetary. Yumm.


As luck would have it, the smoke came over the city I live in. It still stinks. Good thing I'm not asmatic. Oh wait!
Over 400 firemen, two helicopters and two airplanes, the police, military and god knows who got mobilized. Gee, I wonder how much taxdollars that's gonna cost.

EDIT: that shit fire started at noon, and at 19:00 it's still going. WHAT THE FUCK.

K, so we went to the health center to get vacine refreshments. Wait half an hour. They don't give adult the polio vacine, wtf. Tetanus and diphteria vacine - the nurse says it may hurt after an hour, if it swells and is red, ice it before meals. I get the icing it part, but before meals, wha.

Basically, it was a sting and enjoy your world of pain. Turns out I'm OK.

Oh ja, I have a booklet for vacines by the WHO. They refused to make the crosses in there. They have to give me a version of the booklet that is so basic, it's fucking stupid. Great going. Oh, and my WHO fucking INTERNATIONAL booklet is now out of date. GREAT GOING.

Well, I actually never fainted, but sure felt like it after having blood taken.

Hm. I should put something witty here. Just imagine I did.

Hey, I had blood drawn for tests. Hey, I didn't have any breakfast before it. Hey, I had a "weird face" when we left the clinic. My heart is beating like a jungle drum. darunkadunk da-*faints*

W0lb0t: only acceptable if you hunt them down yourself. I don't think there's Tucans in Australia though, are there?

Edit: How many animals ain't I eating? Infinity? Try to eat three times that.

Hey, my IRS "return" arrived. Now I knew I'd have to pay them, but not this much. The simulator told me something around 300EUR, but this one is 730EUR. They also put a cent too much because apparently math rules have no meaning in Portugal. Yes, I made a claim. Let's see what they says.

Hahaha, so true.
No matter how often the waves spit people out, they keep going back in, then they get taken way out. Hm, didn't Eddie Izzard do a bit on that. "The ocean says, so you want to come in? How about you come in a couple miles."

Aditional reasons not to visit beach.

-No matter how much shade and sunscreen you use, you will still get sunburnt.
-You will always end up swalowing your own bodyweight in seawater.
-(this may only apply to australia) Everything in the sea or on the beach is trying to kill you. the sea dosen't want you, but you idiots keep going in it.

People are bothering me to go to the beach. Let me tell you about the beach:
It's fucking boring. And you get to look at strangers asses, flabs and poor choice of beach wear. The fucking waves are too fucking loud, I don't like being in the sun, and don't get me started on sand. And it's always at least a one hour drive, and no one has a decent enough car to have air conditioning. No thanks, "pal".

So today, Sunday, my husband has to be having a router ready, because some guy is in a real hurry to have it. (turns out it is the ex husband of his sister). so he's trying to call her at noon, because he never showed up. Quite urgent, you see. So
I says: "So is this costing more, because its Sunday?"
He: "No"
Me: "Why not?"
Him: "I need the money"
Me: "Exactly!"

So this was my illustration entry.
"1up floader fun"
Not enough votes. sad face.

Thank you all! Right back at ya, bay sick

happy birfday! [my b-day too.]

Happy day to ya.

Happy Birthday!

Aww shucks, you guys

Happy Birthday

Happy Birthday!