Becoming alienated because I cannot tell the truth

[Tra]

On 2007-05-13 17:14, -Shimarisu- wrote:
This is my favourite forum on the internet really, I think a very great deal of it is stupid but I made a lot of good friends here and it's the only place I've ever really been accepted. Accepted as a troll yeah, by some people. But even a good bulk of those people see me as part of this community.

So basically, I'm a very honest person. I'm too honest for my own good. I've lost friends over it, but I choose to be this way. I've had one or two good friends in my life, I loved them like I think you should love friends. They loved me for my personality, with no bullshit. All the silly little minor friendships people build up, I have no time for outside of the internet. People tell me to go outside more and get off the internet. I do, but I'm generally alone.

So basically my problem is with this site, and why I'm finding it hard to post any more.

Yesterday I went on 360 too and left the mic off the whole time. I've alienated myself.

I've got myself in a crazy situation that I can't tell anybody about because being as honest as I am, I left my past wide open and it'll all come back to me, and that's something I can't allow to happen for evenmore reasons I cannot talk about. The inability to talk about the situation saddens me. I'm not ashamed of it, but the fact is it often leaves me lonely. I want to tell the world about what has happened and maybe get some support. The thing is, what has happened has completely and utterly changed my life, and possibly I'm going to lose a lot of what was dear to me.

I tried joining other forums under new IDs. Forums designed for support for people in my situation. But all other factors in my particular scenario caused posters there to say it was too crazy to relate to. And as a newbie I'm just getting ignored. Plus I don't like these people anyway.

And my situation really is THAT MESSED UP and I really can TELL NOBODY ON A PUBLIC FORUM.

I told several people on PSOW what was going on and got their support because they know me better than those stupid other forums, and can see what I'm going to have to go through. I guess they care because they've seen me in a more personal light than a bunch of faceless forums.

As for the rest of you...

I don't know if I know you well enough to say anything. And I'm sorry. But anyway this is why I've not been posting much, and trust me, I'm bothered by it.

Hey good news, I'm banned from the PSU General and Walkthrough forums for a month, you're stuck with me here then

and btw, I think from a previous conversation of ours, you pretty much told me about your past ^_^ Naughty woman...

[-Shimarisu-]

On 2007-05-13 17:45, Ether wrote:

On 2007-05-13 17:38, -Shimarisu- wrote:
I have no clue who Shotie is, and I very much doubt 99% of the community here do either.

No doubt the previous troll you and Triela failed at goading.

Nah, just someone who cheated on her husband with a guy she met on PSO

Nice analysis, but cheating requires lying and that's something I'd be unable to do.

[UnderscoreX]

Just say what you say how you say it whenever you saying it.
This is the rants foruim, you're meant to get things off your chest, and if the topic gets out of hand a mod will probably lock it.

[foamcup]

On 2007-05-13 18:28, -Shimarisu- wrote:

On 2007-05-13 17:45, Ether wrote:

On 2007-05-13 17:38, -Shimarisu- wrote:
I have no clue who Shotie is, and I very much doubt 99% of the community here do either.

No doubt the previous troll you and Triela failed at goading.

Nah, just someone who cheated on her husband with a guy she met on PSO

Nice analysis, but cheating requires lying and that's something I'd be unable to do.

lolwut?

Your topic title says you can't tell the truth, now you say you can't lie? <_<;

[Solstis]

On 2007-05-13 17:41, DikkyRay wrote:
I'm an idiot.

S'okay Shim, breaking in to a new forum takes some time. Lurk around those new sites for a bit, eh?

Dikky, you're not even that good at being an asshole. I give you a C-. You are the Velveeta of forum trolls.

<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: Solstis on 2007-05-13 19:49 ]</font>

[-Shimarisu-]

On 2007-05-13 19:43, foamcup wrote:

lolwut?

Your topic title says you can't tell the truth, now you say you can't lie? <_<;

Choosing to lie in real life is a little bit different from not revealing something about my life on an internet forum, and I've already said that my inability to do the latter is fucking up my ability to post much at all.

[Umberger]

A public forum (well, this one anyways) may not be the best place to seek sympathy. Yeah, there's people here who would be willing to have a long emotional conversation with you and such...but allowing every random person to comment on any imperfections or the like is probably a bad idea.

My final verdict, talk whatever it is out with a good friend or family member...just anyone that will support your decisions and help you through your time of need. Sorry if I'm not exactly the best with words here, but I wish you well and hope you find a solution to your emotional problems. =|

[-Shimarisu-]

I've already talked it over with friends and family and have their support, I just hate not being able to tell the truth on the internet and with my group of gaming friends (because I have only really known them for a short time.)

It's just how I am.

[Sayara]

Any of them you think you trust alittle more than others? If yes, maybe they're the first to know next.

[EphekZ]

ehhh, like someone above mentioned, seeking sympathy, or help rather, on the interweb isn't the best idea. I don't know what your situation is, but my advice would be to gtfo the interweb and take care of shit in real life. Everytime I have problems here I just take a break from the interweb and games and what not and deal with my problems. Since, it seems like from previous posts, you create drama it'd be best if you try to not get it from the interweb since a lot of it is created here, especially this forum.

regardless, I hope everything works out for the better.

edit:

I just hate not being able to tell the truth on the internet and with my group of gaming friends (because I have only really known them for a short time.)

It's just how I am.

Why do you need to seek sympathy on the internet? No need to be reminded of your problems in real life while trying to do something that's supposed to bring joy. Leave the drama in real life.


<font size=-1>[ This Message was edited by: EphekZ on 2007-05-13 20:16 ]</font>