I'm getting upset just reading this......
I'm getting upset just reading this......
Hmm kinda sounds like the rest of your family gave up on herNot surprising what with society's shity atitude towards people with mental health issues.
If it didnt i might have been able to ask for help back when i needed it but whatever i somehow managed to get my self in to a happy stable mental state. I think
Um anyway your sister sounds like she needs some professional help. Sending her to some jesus camp, beating the crap out of her or threatening prison will get ignored or make her worse. Well a police visit might be a wake up call but i doubt it.
Oh dear. As I post this, she's freaking out and yelling at my mom about something I'm not entirely sure about. See, she's in summer school right now to make up for all the credits she didn't receive in her freshman year, and I think mom wanted her to complete her homework before taking her to her friend's house. Well, now she "finished her assignment", and mom wants to see the finished work. My sister is claiming mom can't see it because she already sent it to her teachers and didn't save it and there is 100% no way she can prove to my mom she did her homework.
But she totally did it and so mom is a liar and a bitch and a whore and ugly for not taking her to her friend's house now. And my sister claims she is never good enough no matter what she does.
Siiiigh. I just somehow feel like she might have not done her homework? Anyway...
We have heavily considered sending her off. Boarding school, mental institution, boot camp, juvenile hall, what have you. But what .Rusty. says is correct. My parents are lawyers and are familiar with the mental health system as whatnot, and they are sadly extremely ineffective at actually treating people. A mental health institution would do little more than just medicate her, not give her extensive therapy and rehabilitation like she needs, and juvenile hall... well, what good would that do her, right?
Sending her to boot camp or some other highly structured/disciplinary equivalent might get her in line, but it would also completely kill her relationship with my parents forever, most likely. My mother has spoken to many people who say that they were sent away as children, and while a few of them say it might have improved them, those people want to remain cut off from their parents/families for doing that to them, in general. Something along those lines. I don't remember precisely what my mother said, but it made sense enough.
Therapy, then... it's hard to send someone to therapy who claims they hate doctors and won't accept help from anybody. I mean, she HATES doctors. "What can they tell me about myself that I don't already know?" she claims. I know, I know. Stupid. Infuriating. But you can't rationalize and debate and have a discussion with someone who is being completely irrational.
Uh oh--the situation I said earlier? It's escalating again. She's starting to freak out, and I'm pretty sure there's going to be some destroyed property, or worse. She made plans, and we are interfering with her plans by asking her to do her schoolwork, and when we interfere with HER plans (how dare we!) she goes absolutely batshit.
For the record, I am 17 years old, as I believe that was asked earlier.
Oh alright. Camp - Bad idea.
Just the only thing that came to mind. Sorry. ._.
I've been thinking since Crimera's post though... If one parents disciplines and the other one enables then the disciplin isn't going to have any effect, is it?
I think violence should be avoided if at all possible though. Still got to at least defend yourself on the other hand!
Um... I don't think I'm helping much.
I think you're being strong for being 17 though! If that means anything.
... I'll just be quiet now. ._.
No no! I GREATLY appreciate anything anyone has to say on this issue. It's greatly relieving to know that someone cares or is interested enough to offer their advice. Don't be embarrassed or anything.Originally Posted by Ghost Inside
What you said just now is correct as well. One parent is disciplining, the other is enabling. So... you can imagine how well that works out. What's even worse is that the one disciplining is the one who makes all the money, and the one enabling is just giving that money to her. :s I know in marriage you're supposed to give up the "my money, your money" mentality and it becomes "our money", but I don't know how my mom stands it, sometimes.
One question, avoiding the hatred for Bootcamp might be inevitable, consider:
How were the people who attended it improved?
You're looking to prevent crisis here. If she ends up disabling or killing you, that'd be far more harmful than getting her ass beaten a few times for not making her bed or whatever it is they do.
After reading this, I feel the same... >_>
I am so sorry once again for your situation....
...but she needs to have a royal ass whipping.
ROYAL.
Part of the reason why I am so upset just hearing this is because I understand the feeling of not being able to do anything.
As a child growing up, my father was abusive...not drunk guy abusive, but I'm going to stab you to death abusive. He would put my older brother through walls (literally) and tried to stab him with a kitchen knife. He use to throw iron kitchen chairs at my mother for being late to pick him up from the airport (his job at the time). While sitting next to her in the passenger seat... He punched her in the face for being late to pick him up from the train station. It was midnight and my mother didnt know where she was (lost).
I was a kid, but even I knew my mother should have left him/put him away. When the cops came over one day for neighbors "hearing screams next door" (our house), my father said he wasn't doing anything wrong... while my brother was bleeding in the room just around the corner. I was too scared, I had just awoke to my father yelling like a mad man. No one knew until the cops actually left. My father would apologize (probably out of fear of prison) the next day always.
It goes on and on and on. I would pray everyday in hopes that he would die or that my mother would take us (me, older brother, little brother) away from him forever.
There was nothing we could do, but time killed him. My father was diagnosed with Lupus in 2008-ish. My father died in January of last year after battling Lupus for 4 + years... I just wish we would have gotten him help or something..... I don't know.
I'm older and wiser now. I know that some people will never change. This sister of yours is going to need some serious help. More help than just your immediate family can offer. Get everyone you can involved. That is the one thing I wished we would have done with my father. We tried to handle that monster alone....
EDIT: ;A; Sorry for wall of text ;A;
Last edited by Crimera; Jul 15, 2012 at 07:20 AM.
"she needs to have a royal ass whipping" and then that post o.0
The beat the crazy out of her idea is kinda what what i mean about society's shity attitude. Sure it might make her behave herself for a while but whatever is makeing her act like an asshole is still gonna be there and now she is bottling it up.
it's just an all round crappy situation you cant help her unless she admits she has a problem
Last edited by .Rusty.; Jul 15, 2012 at 11:30 AM.
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